Ok, she and her friend were talking about stuff in my room while i was at piano practice. When practive was over, i asked them to get out of my room so i could finish my history project, so they left the room and talked in the living room. I go to my computer, get rid of the screensaver, and see this "americansingles.com" thing, and so I'm starting to get some thoughts, so I play around a bit, being the tech wiz I am. The screen is on this thing called like a "hot list" or something and it has a bunch of guys on it that my mom apparently has added to it, and so I read some of their profiles, and then I get this thought: Why didn't my mom tell me about this? I go to her profile page and see that she has been a member for this thing for 2 months now...and I'm shocked. What should I do? I'm happy and fearful for her at the same time. I'm 12, gonna turn 13 in April, and I'm a girl. My parents are divorced, and my dad almost never sees me anymore, so its like I just have my mom....HELP!!
2007-01-06 15:01:52 · 20 answers · asked by ok_go_kid 3 in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
Just to tell you, she's 50 already...and when I asked her about it, she kinda just avoided the answer.
2007-01-06 15:08:04 · update #1
She probaly didn't tell you because she was afraid to. Be happy for your mom to meet someone. You will be leaving for college in 6 years and it would be nice if she wasn't alone. Tell her you know about it and you want to know what she is doing. She deserves to have a boyfriend.
2007-01-06 15:06:00 · answer #1 · answered by weswe 5 · 3⤊ 0⤋
I am sure that your mom loves you that will never change but you have to understand that adults need companionship that only other adults can provide.It is hard for people to meet other people if you are home with your kid so she is trying something new. She needs to feel wanted after going through the divorce and that has nothing to do with you or how much time you spend together. If she's been a member for 2 months and nothing bad has happened then she is obviously using good judgement. She didn't tell you cause it is none of your business. If she meets someone she likes then I have no doubt she will tell you. Trust your mom, I do she is raising a bright,caring young lady.
2007-01-06 15:15:23 · answer #2 · answered by noddy 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
She may be your Mom, but she's got a right to a love life, too. How long have your parents been divorced? Maybe it's time for her to move on.
Keep in mind that her deciding to go on this site doesn't mean she's ready to get remarried...or even have dates again! But she may be tired of being alone.
The best thing you can do for her is to have a serious conversation with her...and let her know that no matter what, you'll always love her. Try telling her about your fears - I'm sure she'll be quick to reassure you that any boyfriend of hers will never replace your Dad, and that you'll have veto power over her dates.
Good luck and God bless.
2007-01-06 15:07:01 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
First, take a deep breath. Then remember that your mom has the same rights to privacy as you do - - in fact, she has the right to more privacy since she's older and she's the mom. At your age, you're probably starting to be more involved in school and social activities, leaving your mom with more time on her own to fill. I know the idea of sharing her is tough, but keep in mind that: (1) She's probably lonely. (2) She is just as interested in guys as you are. (3) You won't be around forever and you don't want your mom to be alone the rest of her life. Trust her judgement and try to be mature about her need to be with other adults, especially male ones.
2007-01-06 15:09:39 · answer #4 · answered by semiserene 1 · 2⤊ 0⤋
well it is hard for her to tell you not to talk to strangers on the internet when she is. But she is older and wiser so it still is good for you not to do it.
She could go out on dates with alot of loser and leave you with a babysitter or she could narrow down a few hopefulls to date that do not run when she says she has a kid.
You can tell her you saw the sight and she may just be looking but reinsure her you understand she is an adult but she needs to be careful also you will always be a big part of her life but she needs one also. Look at it this way it is always just you and her than you will be 20 or 30 or 40 and not dating either becasue your mom will always need you
2007-01-06 15:09:14 · answer #5 · answered by G L 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sweetie, your mom just wants to have a life. I'm sure she loves you, but there would be no reason for her to tell you about this, as she probably just thought it would upset you. Just because she's on this website doesn't mean she's actually seeing any of these guys, and if she is, she probably won't tell you about it unless she starts to get serious. I don't think she's hiding anything from you, really, she probably just wants to start dating again, but doesn't want to upset you.
You should talk to her about it, without getting angry or accusing her of anything. You'll feel a lot better if you do.
2007-01-06 15:08:53 · answer #6 · answered by rufus_rob 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
It seems like maybe you are afraid that if your mom dates you will lose her, and she's all you have. Sweetie, I don't think you have to worry about this. Just because your mom is on a dating website doesn't mean much, and even if she starts dating, she will still be your mom. I know that you want her to be happy, and it sounds like you have a pretty good relationship with her. Why don't you ask her about what you saw? I think she would answer you and reassure you.
2007-01-06 15:05:55 · answer #7 · answered by Cris O 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
She'll come around to talking to you about it when she feels comfortable. Her life has changed for a variety of reasons, her age, your dad is gone, etc., but she still wants some happiness. I would not have told you either as this is something that's personal and nothing substantial has come of it. Be happy though, she seems as if she still has some jazz.
2007-01-07 09:58:23 · answer #8 · answered by Emerald Jones 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sorry kid but you are OUT OF BOUNDS HERE! She normally didn't have to tell you until she was ready, but since she got a little careless, & used the computer in your room to log onto a dating site, I guess you are now in a position that you can ask her about it since she left the computer logged on to the site.
Just let her know that you found the site open on your computer, & leave it up to her to come clean about it. If she decides she's not ready to tell you everything then you need to back off because it's really none of your business.
2007-01-06 15:10:13 · answer #9 · answered by No More 7 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Its not wierd that your mom didnt tell you. Shes the parent and you are the child. Your mom is just looking for someone to make her happy and this is her way of doing it. If she finds someone that she really likes then she will eventually introduce you but until then its shouldnt be a concern of yours. If its really bugging you then bring it up to your mom.
2007-01-06 15:07:56 · answer #10 · answered by lilly 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋