i was recently left by my wife now almost every weekend is a new girl.I always call the next day and still talk to alot of them ,but i cant seem to commit and i cant seem to stop.
2007-01-06 11:49:29 · 32 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
Well, I don't think it's unhealthy. I went through a period of one night stands a few years ago, but have passed that stage and made other things priority. Now all is balanced....just have fun and you'll know when to stop...as long as you have safe sex, there's nothing wrong with what you're doing.
2007-01-06 11:53:24 · answer #1 · answered by Renee 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I'm sure a lot of people will scream - OH NO don't do it, it's bad, it's immoral, etc. I say - do whatever works for you. One-night stands can be a great distraction when you're going through a traumatic experience; you can't always be a pillar of strength - sometimes you NEED distractions, however midless and stupid they may seem in comparison to your normal experience. Be honest with yourself and with others - this is the best you can do; don't promise them more committment than you feel you can give at the moment. The whole situation you're in right now is "emotionally unheathy": being left by one's partner is probably one of the most difficult experiences one can go through. I'm of the view that desperate situations call for desperate measures; just like when sometimes it feels good to let off steam by throwing a plate against the wall, the one-night stands might simply be your way to deal with your anger and resentment. As long as you don't keep throwing plates against the wall on the daily basis for years, I'd say there's no problem. Just remember to employ other, more productive ways of dealing with trauma at the same time - therapy, exercise, hobbies, friends and family; things will get better eventually, they always do. Good luck.
2007-01-06 12:02:16 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
A friend of mine went through this after she split with her boyfriend of several years. Why can't you commit? If it is because your afraid of getting hurt then you do need to stop it soon, unless you want an STD. I'm being serious, this will end badly if your not very careful. It's not unhealthy unless it's making you feel bad for doing it. If you do feel bad about it, the next girl you see, don't do anything with them. Give the relationship a little time to mature. See what happens. Maybe your not ready for a committed relationship, and you need time. There is nothing wrong with that.
2007-01-06 11:55:22 · answer #3 · answered by christinedaae 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Interesting answers but when you get right down to it - you are an adult with adult women. You have just left by a woman you were committed to. This is natural, normal behavior. Enjoy it for what it is. If you spend tooo much time analyzing it you'll go crazy.
I am a woman and wish I had several one night stands to "worry" about. I have been divorced for 1 and 1/2 years. Of course the standards are different for women.
Oh well, enjoy yourself. SMILE
2007-01-06 11:59:54 · answer #4 · answered by goddess 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It's not emotionally healthy, it's destructive behavior and won't leave you feeing anyhting close to satisfying. It may not seem as destructive for a guy to be doing this but it's seems to be bothering you already. It's high risk behavior and even if you are being supaer careful you chances of catching a disease increase with each conquest. Think about seeing a therapist or going to a support group.
2007-01-06 11:53:07 · answer #5 · answered by Rachel Green 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
It all depends on the reasons. if youare doing it to fill a void then no it's not the right way and it will just take some time to get over your wife.
If it's for fun and you're not hurting anyone and are practicing safe sex, there's nothing really wrong with it.
I find that they are never worth it and I always regretted it the next day, don't you?
2007-01-06 11:52:22 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
This is very unhealthy emotionally and physically not only to you but to the woman you are having sex with. Woman have a whole different mental attitude toward sex then men do. For men it can be unattached but women emotionally attach themselves to their partners.
You probably already realize this and this could be some weird behavior you have established to punish your wife.
Stop it and seek some professional counseling
2007-01-06 11:55:48 · answer #7 · answered by Sparrow 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Emotionally you will eventually probably burn out and feel empty. Then there is the physical to contend with. Over 40% of people have genital herpes (symptomatic or asymptomatic). Will that tend to cool your jets? And that's only one STD. Do you think the next "love of your life" will enjoy whatever you bring to the table?
I am not judging you by any means, but please look into the health ramifications of this behavior.
http://www.cdc.gov/nchstp/dstd/disease_info.htm
2007-01-06 11:53:47 · answer #8 · answered by Lake Lover 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you're sleeping with several women, I hope you are using a condom for your sake and theirs. Emotionally healthy -- probably not (especially) if it's a game to you. But it's fairly normal since you just became single again. Why worry about committing to anyone when you aren't over your last relationship. If you are honest with the women and let them know you aren't looking for a relationship -- then that leaves it up to them if they want to sleep with you.
2007-01-06 11:53:46 · answer #9 · answered by JusMe 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Addictive isn't it?
Be careful here.
You are going through a lot emotions after a divorce, there is probably self esteem issues, depression, possible guilt, loneliness, anger, and hurt.
You are afraid to commit and be hurt again. I would take some time off from relationship period and take time to heal yourself. When you are emotionally healthy you will attract better friends, better lovers and better relationships.
Take time for yourself, you deserve it.
2007-01-06 11:54:15 · answer #10 · answered by Missy Lyons 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋