My boyfriend has expressed to me that he is not ready to settle down or to be tied down. He said he is commited to me in his own way by being faithful to me and when he says he will call me or he will meet me, he has never ever disappointed me in this way. He has always been pretty reliable, which I really like about him. Other guys in the past sometimes did not call when they said they would. He is always very honest even though it sometimes hurts but he says he prefers to tell me the truth rather than lying to me and doing bad things behind my back. Anyway, I am 2 years older than him, he is 26. He's a very ambitious person and he is aiming very high in his career. He says he is now at the stage of his life where he wants to focus on his career. We've been together for a couple of years but for the last year, it has been a long-distance relationship. I admit I have been quite pushy with him for more commitment but he says he isn't ready to give up all of his freedom. Should I worry?
2007-01-06 10:46:46 · 11 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
No, you should be happy. You have the man most would woman could only dream of. He's not leading you onto anything and he' being straighforward with you. It doesn't mean you're not the girl for him, it just means it's not the time. =) No reason to worry...be proud of him for being realistic and thinking ahead. And think of it this way, the reason why he wants to wait is because when you guys get married or something, he wants to give you his all, not only half of himself. It's for the best for both of you.
2007-01-06 10:51:36 · answer #1 · answered by brendi ^_^ 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It doesn't sound good, sorry to say. The long-distance thing makes it even harder.
The best you can do is take this guy at face value. That means if he says he's not ready to settle down and doesn't want to be "tied down," take him at his word. Assume this is really what he wants, and act accordingly. That means you either need to extract yourself from it or discuss with him about your seeing other people.
If what you want is ultimately more commitment, I don't think this is the guy for you, sweets. Sorry.
2007-01-06 10:51:14 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yes you should. You're entitled to. But don't do anything stupid. The thing you did wrong, was push him. Guys are afraid of commitment, he's afraid of it because of something that happened in the past. You need to help him out of it and show him that it's not really bad. He's a good guy, you're a good girl. Be patient with him. Good Luck.
2007-01-06 10:52:16 · answer #3 · answered by Girl-In-Blue 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yes, clearly. If a guy says that to you then you should worry. Sounds to me like ou are giving more than you are getting back. There has to be a balance.
My advice - when you find someone who loves you as much as you love them - and gives as much as you give - then thats the right person. If you don't feel that way, then its not the right person.
2007-01-06 10:51:29 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sounds to me as tho he may be using you... he sed he is being faithful but if he doesnt want to be in a relationship and is still ringing you to meet up every so often i'd say its only for one thing. and if he's not getting that one thing, he's definately hoping he will. and if he is getting it, he's ringing cuz your his reliable booty call. Trying cutting off the supply and if he still shows interest in you have a chat with him about the siyuation again...
2007-01-06 10:54:45 · answer #5 · answered by ciara_e2007 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I'm no expert but this is definately not the time to push for commitment. Look around but don't run around. This may be Mr Right Now not Mr Right.
2007-01-06 10:53:45 · answer #6 · answered by Sid B 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
He means what he says. He's not ready. One day he may be. Are you willing to wait? Are you willing to accept the consequences if you wait and he decides it's not you he wants to marry. I think if I were you I would have him state clearly his intentions. Then Iisten. He means what he says.
If you want to wait or be in the kind of relationship you have now then stay. If not time to date others .
2007-01-06 10:50:25 · answer #7 · answered by BRENDA 1 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
propose women are no longer the only ones who arise for themselves. a candy female does not could desire to a pushover, and maximum adult adult males does not want that besides. effective women arise for themselves, too, and could argue with something she disagrees with. that's a reasonably ridiculous assertion that girls folk who arise for themselves and argue are propose.
2016-11-27 00:31:57 · answer #8 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you keep pushing him, yes. Give him time to "make his mark" on the world. Be glad that he is trying to make something of himself.
2007-01-06 10:49:04 · answer #9 · answered by NAN G 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Just let him do what he wants with his life. He hasn`t forgoten about you.Don`t worry.
2007-01-06 10:52:20 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋