tell me a joke?

Question

i need a good joke
and laughter id the best medicine

i seriously want new and good ones
not lame ones

Answer 1

moo

Answer 2

The prophet Muhammad was walking along the dusty road out of Medina when he realized he needed a place to sleep. He saw the root gatherers hut in the distance and headed for it. He knocked at the entrance-way and the root gatherer came to the door and said "Yes". The Prophet said, " I am a traveling religious zealot with delusions of godhood and I need a place to sleep for the night." The root gatherer said, " You are welcome to sleep here, but you will have to sleep up in the loft with my pre-teen daughter." He answered "OK" and climbed the ladder to the loft. The next morning he came down and squatted down next to the root gatherer and accepted a cup of tea. The root gatherer asked, "Did you enjoy sleeping with my daughter?". The Prophet said, "Yes I did very very much, but I have to ask, why was there rice in her mouth?". The root gatherer replied, "Oh, that is not rice, that is maggots, she has been dead for two years."

Answer 3

If everybody would just listen to Jack Bauer the show would be called "12".

Answer 4

a white man had a pet monkey and a black guy was selling bananas.so the back guy said "mr.can u look after my bananas iam goin to the tiolet"."oh yes go ahead"said the white guy.when the black guy came bac there were no more bananas and he goes mad,"where are my bananas?"the white man says "ask your brother".then the white guy said few seconds later,"can you look after your brother im going to the tiolet.the black guy says ok.when the white guy came back the monkey was dead and he went mad asking "what happened to my monkey"?the black dude says"mr. dont get involved its a family matter

Answer 5

Where do cows go on Saturday nights?
To the Movvvvvvvies