Why do people insist on punishing children?

Question

I get realy annoyed that parents find it easier to chastize a child for being naughty, rather than sit down and realise that a child is only being a child......As humans we dont like to be punished for something that we understand to be wrong, so why do some people think they can go around hurting children. Am a mother and know the strains put on us, but is there any need for punishment..............Kindness starts at home not in society......

Answer 1

It depends what you mean by "punish" do you mean physical smacking or verbally telling a child off?
Sometimes you need to tell the child off, to teach them to have boundaries. Ive told my daughter numerous times "dont touch the oven, it will burn you." but she still tries to go near the oven so i told her off and put her back in the livingroom.
If the child knows they are doing something wrong then they need telling off! what would happen if the child done something that could seriously hurt them, knew it could, but still wanted to do it, dont you think that child needs telling more sternly?
What i do think is that people need to explain why kids shouldnt do things, for example the oven being hot and they can get hurt etc rather than just shouting no and them not knowing why they shouldnt do it.
As for physical punishment i think thats a very taboo subject, sometimes a child needs a tap on the bum/hand but i dont think that any child should get a beating or even one smack hard enough to leave a mark, not even a bit of redness!

Answer 2

haha, well, i know a lot of kids who arent "chastized," as you put it, and lets say that they are BRATS who think that the world revolves around them. Also, chastizement doesnt necessarily mean beating someone with a wooden spoon...there are many non-violent forms of it. Grounding, for example, teaches a child the meaning of trust. They must first prove to their parents that they can be trusted to follow simple rules, and only then will they gain priviledges. It's like any working environment in the "real world", like school or an office building. There are rules to follow, and if those rules are broken, trust is lost, and there are reprecussions. The sooner children learn this the easier it will be for them.

Answer 3

The bible says that he who does not chastise his child hates him. A lot stronger than spare the rod and spoil the child. Whether you end up hating them because they're horrible brats because you didn't punish them or if you hated them and that's why you didn't bother to punish them it doesn't say but either way you'll end up hating the child and yourself for letting him get the way he is. How is a child supposed to know what is appropriate behavior with no punishment? Where do you draw the line? Do you suffer from the misguided belief that children are perfect and thus do not commit sin? Newsflash we're all born with evil tendencies, it's discipline that shapes a good person. Train them up in the way they should go and they will never depart from it.

Answer 4

Actually, there is a new method of punishing your children. Instead of taking something away from them or other harsh punishments, you should scold them or tell them you really disapprove of their actions. Strangely enough, children want their parents approval of things they do and usually stop afterwards. Punishing someone because of what they did will only discourage them from being a good person afterwards.

For instance, me and my dad got in an argument and he took away privilege to the car. This made me care even less about getting along with him and even less about school. The same with the computer in my room. It makes children care less, this is the opposite of what most parents want.

Scold them, they should care if you didn't anger them too much. Besides, you can't beat your children and even if it was legal lots of my peers brag about beating their own parents up at school. Thats not right!

Answer 5

I was punished as a child and it taought me that if i do something wrong there would be punishmwent and that is how it is in life. dont do get work get fired. break a law go to jail. i would with adults that are so spoiled they dont care what they do. if it hurts other. it even says in the bible if you dont chastize you child you do not love them. this does not always mean spank. I do not agree with parents who hurt there children, but a good pop on the butt sometimes is warented

Answer 6

Have you ever watched the "Nanny" or "Nanny 911". Some of those kids...OMG. Most of that is the parents fault.
Kids need to know right from wrong. . Don' get me wrong I don't believe in child abuse but when my children were small they knew what NO meant and that there were consequences. A paddling, privilege's take away. Sometimes it hurt me more than the kids. I know I would probably be in trouble today for that one. They have all turned out to be well adjusted adults.

Answer 7

A child should be asked why they did what they did to see if they are doing it just to get attention, because they don't understand, etc. Then explained the consequences for why that is not a good choice.

Then if punishment is truly necessary, depending on that child - some may only need a time out, others might need to be grounded, and still others might need a spanking.

It depends on alot of factors; situation, understanding, age, appropriateness, etc.

Answer 8

you don't have to punish, you do need to make them aware of their mistakes I am also a mother. I have seen the difference between a child who has been taught right from wrong. then the ones the parents just said oh that's just a kid being a kid. I work with young people and most of them say my parents allowed m to behave this way so it carried over into their adult hood. you don't have to abuse your child to chastise them. but it is our jobs, as parents not society's to discipline; you are a grandma so I do understand where you are coming from.still you must realize that discipline is necessary.. you don't wait until they are old to teach them you start when they are young and are willing to listen. do because you love them.

Answer 9

For a lot of parents, the job is all about controlling their children. Personally, I don't see it that way. My job is to teach my child to control THEMSELVES. This does involve discipline, but discipline and punishment are not the same thing. For some children this does require spanking, for others it is enough to simply sit down and talk.

Answer 10

The only reason you know what is right or wrong is that some time in your life you were taught that. How else are they going to learn. If you don't teach your children the difference between the two and the consequences what will ever stop them from doing what ever they want.