How can make sure i only attract guys that are serious and not players??

Question

I have told im good looking quite a lot (not that im cocky about it all im flattered)
im at college/university and bcz im more confident in myself and hate being fake/superficial, have recentely broke up with someone (who i am sorta over now and semi ready for something new maybe), etc etc im making a lot of new guy mates etc. so im attracting a lot of male attention
Currently I am dating 2 guys at the mo they both knw their probs not the only potentials (so my morals are intact just about!)
one is a player who apparently likes me a lot
the other is not but im still a lil cynical... i like the player more ahhh!!
How can i find a decent man at university (im in england) who doesnt lead me on and doesnt just want a fling/sex im getting cynical and sick of it!!!
Help? Or are most just too immature at this age?? but i still want to find myself a nice boyfriend!!! cz i get emtionally attached easily and are a lil too forgiving help??

they both know im looking for a relationship!!! and will decide soon so not my problem i didnt go looking for it, it happened!

they know that before the words g/friend / b/friend have been spoken ..
besides havent slpt with them or anything!!

how the hell do u know if im up my own ****?? jeez whos the whos presumptious, just cz i know my own worth but arent cocky and use it for bad reasons!! This is the 1st time i have ever dated 2 guys... u just wish it could happen to you.. ive been worried sick about the morality of it all plus made sure i wasnt hurting anyone so screw u, u dont know me!

i didnt know the 1st guy was a player at 1st i found out!!! and was told thru one of his best friends who didnt want me to get hurt!!! and 2nd was told that he does really like above the one other gal he was seeing so you see my dilemma?? i asked him what he is looking for?? a relationship or more?? and waiting for his reply....

Answer 1

you need to play hard to get.

Answer 2

Treat others the way you want to be treated. If you don't want players, don't BE a player. Dating two guys at the same time spells trouble. You might be ready for something new, but you need to step back and really take a look at everything that's available.

When you go to a restaurant, do you ALWAYS know exactly what you want to eat? No; there's factors that affect your decision, such as mood, weight, your budget, the time of day, and so on. It works the same way with relationships. You're zoned in on one particular "type" of guy that you don't know what else is out there. You're not seeing the FULL picture.

As far as the guys -- the first one sounds like he's not what you're looking for. If he's a player, there's no question -- he's gonna play you like everyone else. Tell him it's been real and move on. The second one might have a chance if he's not used to jumping around from girl to girl.

Personally, I don't think you should be concentrating on getting a new boyfriend right now. You need to take AT least a few weeks off of the dating scene and really analyze yourself. What do you REALLY want? Figure out details. How educated do you want your boyfriend to be? What do you want him to do without question? Where do you want him to be financially? Do you want a guy with good looks or a good personality? Then the most important part is to STICK with whatever you choose for yourself, and don't settle for anything less.

Hope that helped.

Answer 3

It is exceptionally hard to find any guy that isn't a player. There is no way that you can guarantee you finding someone serious. The thing is that there will always be nice guys along with all the bad ones, so you have to kind of sort through the bad to recognise the good ones when you do eventually find them. It is really hard to do! Look at it this way, after going through a whole bunch of bad relationships with guys who were only players and were not serious about their relationships with you, when you eventually find a guy who is serious about your relationship and who isn't with you only for your looks and sex appeal, then you will recognise him and appreciate him more than ever. There are some girls who are lucky enough to find a great guy first time around, but then they often don't appreciate their men, so those who have been through bad relationships know what its like and are grateful to have found a good one. Hope it works out for you!

Answer 4

1. Groom immaculately
2. Dress nicely
3. Study harder than ever
4. Spend an hour a day in the library
5. Spend an hour a day at the gym
6. Honor your parents and your teachers
7. Get involved in a worthy school function
8. Volunteer a few hours a week for a worthy cause
9. Help someone every day
10. Go to Church
11. Invite your friends to Church
12. Take group dance lessons
13. Take more cold showers

Good Luck

Answer 5

Ok, seriously the only way to make sure that a guy will stay with you is not to let him have a fling tease him, get to know him. And the thing where u like the player more, why do u think hes a player its his job to get girls to like him, dont feel bad about it just try to break away from it. Once in a while ask him a question about urself he should know such as your middle name or how u spell ur last name ussually a player wont know.

Answer 6

You should be looking for a man for a serious relationship--don't date boys.
If you think you can settle down with a 'player' you will be in for a great big shock when he goes out and does his playing with someone else instead.

edit--she's not in a serious committed relationship--so she can date 100 different guys a week if she wants to--having lots of fun while at it too!

edit--If I knew how to flush out some of those player types I wouldn't have got smoked on more than one occasion and I could give you sound advice on that subject--it can be tough if you get attached too soon.
There is the problem--if you want to take someone serious you have to take yourself right up to the edge with them before you can sometimes find out if you are being suckered--and it might be that you went over the edge and you end up getting burned.
'been there--done that'

Answer 7

Well, I am 14 years old and I am player and i go with a lot of girls but the difference with me is, I am young and I shouldn't be thinking about having sex. Plus I am not the type of person that will hurt a girls feelings and stuff like that. Cause before asking the person out I tell them point blank on the type of person I am. (For some reason they like the fact that I am honest). But basically what i am trying to say is find someone that is sincere and honest, cause you can't always go by the looks.

Answer 8

Well...first off, why are you dating 2 guys? If you do that a BIGGER problem could jump on for a ride on thje other problem. Now, just because players & non-serious guys are attracted to you, doesnt mean you have to be attracted to them. So..(also if im sounding mean or anything i apoligize =] ) Just when a guy asks you on a date or something or to hang out or whatever...go. See how he is. If hes a loser...a player..a non-serious guy...then say yep great time bye..and go fishing again...plus...you cant just LOOK for a boyfriend...you have to find one...because if you look, all that will cause is stress and depression ect.....plus...i dont think it will be hard for you to find someone in not time because like you said...ppl think your goodlooking and VERY confident in your self...which are 2 fantastic traits for men to have in there women GOOD LUCK

Answer 9

How about first you stop labeling people and see them far who they are. Then maybe you will see past your little prejudices and see who you might really be interested in. Take a good hard look at yourself too, may you want to be used by a man or two before you settle down.

Answer 10

You can't. You'll attract guys who are interested in your for all kinds of reasons. It's up to you to only "PICK" the one's you're interested in. It's up to you. So, apparently you're looking for a husband, not a boyfriend. Even Good guys who are looking for girlfriends are interested mostly in sex. If you plan to hook up with a nice guy, do you not want him to be interested in sex? Yeah, you do need help if that's what you're thinking. Maybe

Answer 11

what does it matter to you if or if not you get a player, your a player yourself, dating 2 men at the same time. So if you can play the game i hope its played on you!