what is more important jealousy or love?

Question

3 months ago I asked my fiancee for time apart. things were moving fast, marriage was coming, and I thought I needed to think alone. She was very upset, but I insisted and didnt see her for a month. I realized how much I loved and I asked her to take me back. At first she was still angry at me and she was dating someone else. She kept dating him for about 1 week. She eventually forgave me and we are engaged again. Recently I found out that she had sex with the other guy the night before she took me back. She says she wanted to experience him, but that she wanted to teach me a lesson and test my love. She also said wanted the guy was very sweet and she wanted to thank him. She told him she would go back to me, so the last night she admits they did it almost all night, three times. We have talked a lot, about how she was hurt, and I have expressed its ok to tell how she enjoyed the sex. we are back in love and my heart knows that, but I cannot stop my head from being jealous. advice

Answer 1

aaww..i know how you feel! i have to deal with a very easily-jealoused bf in the past..but look dude..if you really love her and she mean the world to you then don't hold on to the past..she's the one you love and let's be rational here..you were the one who needed time off the relationship..you gave her the opportunity to date another guy and to have great sex with..if you didn't let her go for a month mind you..all these wouldn't have happened..you're lucky to have gotten her back! so now all you have to do is to deal with your jealousy..telling her how you feel exactly might be a great way..let her know! but now..the most important thing is being with her and learning to treasure what you've got..because u know you can't afford to lose her again!

good luck =)

Answer 2

Maybe I'm from the "old school". It makes me wonder how much she loves you if she jumped into a relationship with another guy so fast and even had sex with him AFTER you and her decided to get back together. There are ways to say thanks without having sex all night. I wouldn't thank a guy for having sex with me anyway or having a relationship with me. I would thank a friend for advice, or a store clerk for showing me whre a product was, etc. How may people go around "Thanking" someone they were in a relationship with. That's just dumb. I have had broken relationships as have many people. I was too hurt to even think about another man for a long time, let alone only a month. Better rethink the engagement. (And this is from a woman's point of view) I'm 50 and have lived a while and seen lots of things.

Answer 3

"Recently I found out that she had sex with the other guy the night before she took me back. She says she wanted to experience him, but that she wanted to teach me a lesson and test my love".

What kind of b.s. is that? I'll sleep with someone to "test your love" and not only that but she seemed to have found someone else pretty quickly didn't she?

My advice, run buddy, run. Forget her, having read this I understand why you needed time alone, it's because she's full of $#!+ She isn't right for you and will cheat on you. Don't say you weren't warned!.

Answer 4

This isn't going to work out. I'll tell you right now, you both are, were way out of align. She did something that might happen once your married. She treated sex like it was a bargaining chit and free for anyone that she deemed reasonable. I'm sorry but that's my feeling about it.
Every time an argument is going to come up I'll bet this comes up, it's going to be the basis for your troubles and it's just not worth it. I wouldn't worry about her feelings, she seems to be very shallow to do this to you.

You had every right to ask her to wait, everything was moving to fast but, that didn't give her the option to jump into the sack.

Answer 5

Jealousy do now not see no undergo in techniques if a guy or woman is literate or an illiterate. And it additionally do now not see gender. In professionalism, a female might have jealousy over her male colleague and vice versa. because of the certainty of healthful jealousy only, which in turn creates competency, lots of the corporate residences flourish.

Answer 6

You guys are not ready for marriage. I would get some pre-marital or individual counseling. Sounds like she has some issues with being faithful and it wont necessarily stop once you are married. She shouldnt be having sex with other guys to teach you a lesson or to test you...that is just plain wrong.

Answer 7

If you two were apart, you have no right to act upset that she slept with someone else. But, if you were under the assumption that you were back together, basically it is cheating. I think the two of you need to work out some issues before you get married. You sound as if you're unsure about marriage and she shouldn't need to test your love.

Answer 8

let me tell you your reality with other view.
You got scared from the commitment so you told her to be alone few time before marrige.[You are without excuse!]..She felt angry and because she wanted to ''punish'' you she date an other men..You, eventually understand how stupid was that you did and you desided that you want her back. She -unfortnatelly- agreed and [i really don't know why...] she forgive you. After all these, she wanted to test her feelings about you , who you really disapoint her, so to be sure about something she is going to change her life...Now, you r telling us that you are jealous and you want advice....My advice is ; be carefull cuz you r really stupid not see the angel you have in your side and how much she love you and you may loose her...

Answer 9

well if that is her way of saying thanks id advice you to think the re engagement over.....she stated that he was sweet and wanted to thank him...think about that if she really loved you she would have never slept w/ him dating is one thing cant say that was wrong maybe she didnt want to be alone wanted someone to talk to whatever but sleeping w/ him to say good bye is not a good sign....sorry take my advice plz and how is that testing your love....does that mean that she can go do it over and over again to test your love sorry again but that makes no sense

Answer 10

ya in your case it shows you love her , starting every thing work smoothly , when its become old start to hit back to your life , Love is more impotent , but be Wise to be with it. Good luck