I repeatedly told the guy im dating that If he drank thats the end of our relationship. Im not a drinker myself. And he said he understood that I wanted a alcohol free relationship. However tonight... he decided to drink (his 1st time drinkin since we been together). He said he deserves one chance. I somewhat agree. However I thought he understood.... i stressed it enough. What do u think?
2007-01-05 23:08:52 · 19 answers · asked by mmm 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
I think that this relationship won't work. Someone who is not opposed to alcohol will want to drink sometime. He's going to drink again. Your view on alcohol is clearly a strong opposition, his is obviously in favor of alcohol consumption except that he is being restrained by you, you can't change his mind.
2007-01-05 23:13:00 · answer #1 · answered by Celebrate Life 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
I think you need to find a guy that you don't feel you have to change to suit your taste. The guy has rights too...just as you do. If he wants to spend his drinking....well that is his choice....not your's. The only choice you really have is to accept it or move on to someone that has the very same values, taste, desires, etc. that you do. I'm sure it's unpleasant for you to hear, but you don't have the right to control this mans actions and personal behaviors. Perhaps you should reconsider what constitutes a "drinker".... an occasional drink does not make an alcoholic.
2007-01-06 07:39:56 · answer #2 · answered by slick chik 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i think u need to put this in perspective. for him to drink and know it might upset u he might be stressed or worried and or he might just want a drink every ONCE in a while if its done in moderation to where its never a real issue like him being so stinking juiced hes doing the maccarana 4 in the morning in a pair of red heels and a hoodie in the middle of the street,lol. u should be able to bend a little for him being a rational adult. u can be coming off a little controlling u know? this lil bitty thing could push somebody special away u know? so ease up and take a look at the situation, away from the facts of just what u want. if u kno hes not a lush or a daily or even weekly drinker u should be able to coop as long as he understands u wont tolerate drunkenness. u feel me?
2007-01-06 07:21:05 · answer #3 · answered by MinniePearl 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
As long as he's not drinking to excessively. 3-7 drinks per week, would be within reason. Just simply demanding an alcohol free relationship is going to cause resentment on his part.
If you want a totally alcohol free relationship then perhaps you best move to Salt Lake City, Utah and marry one of those goody two shoes Mormon Missionary types.
2007-01-06 07:14:13 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
No drinking means no drinking.
This is your choice.
I too do not accept drinking in a relationship because I see what it can do to the person as well as the relationship. You have to stand strong on your own words, you can't say that it is OK today and not OK tomorrow.
If you don't like a guy who drinks...................let him go.
Last, this guy is a drinker and once you are married, he will do what he wants "drinking". OH, wait a minute, he didn't even wait to hide it.
2007-01-06 07:14:41 · answer #5 · answered by Sunflower 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
i can understand that if you've told him numerous times then he obviously knew how you felt about him drinking. on the other hand i can understand that yes people can tend to slip up. if he's the one telling you that you should give him one chance, it kind of sounds like he had planned it all along, knowing you;d give him that chance. is up to you, but i think you're being a bit harsh on the guy. let him a have a drink!
2007-01-06 07:14:16 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you want to give him a second chance, go ahead. The sad thing is you will be lowering your standards and he will always think he can get you to forgive him. If he truly respected you he would have told you from the very start that he could not be the person you wanted.
2007-01-06 07:20:45 · answer #7 · answered by goldengirl 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Good question. I myself am a drinker, but if a girl I cared about asked me not to drink, I would abstain (EXCEPT on my birthday and the anniversary of my best friend's death. Those days are reserved by me to do whatever the hell I feel like).
2007-01-06 07:12:19 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
TOUGH LOVE---alcoholics---druggies---fire bugs---abusers---they all need that chance----reality check---they are just weak in the knees people who cannot control themselves---and what happens next time---you going to go through this your entire life???You're not his mommy---so get out and find a nice normal guy---unless you have some kind of need to play nurse and tolerate this behavior--if you choose to--you deserve what ever happens---that's just tough love...wisen up move on
2007-01-06 07:15:18 · answer #9 · answered by fire_inur_eyes 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It's just a jump to the left
And then a step to the right
With your hands on your hips
You bring your knees in tight
But it's the pelvic thrust
That really drives you insane
Let's do the Time Warp again
Let's do the Time Warp again
2007-01-06 07:12:45 · answer #10 · answered by erinbrae_erinnbree 1 · 0⤊ 1⤋