Should I risk our friendship and tell him how I feel or keep it to myself and miss out on something so real?

Question

About two months ago I realized that I had developed feelings for one of my best friends. I don't know when these feelings came about, I just looked at him one day and saw him differently. When he smiles at me it makes my heart skip a beat. i think about him all the time, little things that don't matter to other people remind me of him. When I hear his voice it makes me smile. I don't know everything about him, but what I know tells me that he is a genuine person and makes me want to know all of him. All of our friends see something between us and declare we should be together. I want to tell him how I feel, but I am scared. There are signs that shows he has mutual feelings, but they are not obvious. He is kind of shy, so even if he does feel the same, I don't think he would ever say anything. I would have to be the one to make the move and I have never been the aggressive type of girl. I don't want to lose out on something great because of fear. What should I do you? Help, please!

Answer 1

Of course you have to tell him your feelings!You don`t see him like just a friend and he has to know!Don`t let the time go by and loose moments of happiness.It is very important for a relationship to start as a friendship.That means you have a lot in common.Even in case he doesn`t feel the same you will know it and live with it.Reality is always welcome.Find ways to show your feelings and soon you`ll have the opportunity to express them.Touch him, hug him,whisper to him things.There are a lot to do instead of talking.Body language will help you.Good luck! And don`t forget life is to short.Don`t waste it by hiding yourself behind your fears!

Answer 2

Girl! Go for it! You only live once I always say. If he's a "true friend" you making the move should not deter your "friendship" If he doesn't feel the same he can tell you and you can keep the friendship and know at least you tried. If you don't you will never know and may have regrets. You don't want regrets. Let your heart lead the way. It will never mislead you. Best wishes for you both. Sounds promising to me. You like him, he likes you! Do it!

Answer 3

Listen. Listen Good. Listen real good. I was in the same situation. Liked the best guy friend, him being shy, everyone saying we should date, getting advice on yahoo. Teachers even said it, and they took a picture of us and someone gave it to me for Christmas.....the picture was cute.......it'll be in the yearbook......anyway.....Well, he flirted and stuff with me. I fell for him, and then I decided I couldn't wait anymore....so I told him. At first he did not believe me. Then, we didnt talk for 2 days. Then I told him that we were being distant and that I still had feelings for him. And I also wrote him an email stating my feelings for him. I kinda wanted him to ask if he liked me, but i didnt. And then when i told him i had feelings for him, he started turning red. Then the other time i told him, his words got kinda shaky afterwards, but hes really shy. Never had a girlfriend, doesnt get many crushes. Well, after that i stopped liking him. I told him. Every since then, we havent associated with each other the same. I recently wrote him an email about how i felt about this. He hasn't responded, but he did tell me that he didnt want to end the friendship. We've been talking alot more these days. Well, i said my story because maybe it could have helped you a little. But besides the story, i advise you to just kinda do small things to him to show him how you feel. Like, if you ever hug, give it an extra squeeze before you let go, flirt, and when your standing next to him try and scoot in a little closer to him. See how he responds, and try to make it noticeable. Nobody would probably pay attention if you leaned a centimenter closer to him. If he scoots in to you too, thats good. But if he moves away....might be bad. If he scoots in but goes back out, he is probably just being really shy. If he doesnt move, maybe he isnt sure how he feels about you or didnt notice. Give him a smile. If he returns it, turns red, or something like that its good. Try and look at him, and try to put on a smile. Basically, just do stuff you wouldnt normally do to friends and judged by his responses, maybe you could tell if he wants a little bit more or not. But, be careful--boys sometimes tend to lead girls on. But yes, he sounds as if he likes you.

Answer 4

boy, this is a tough one. I myself was in this boat this past spring. A friend of mine and I that I thought were just good friends ended up being something more. Only it took us about a year to fess up to it. He gave me his email address one night and we got on messenger and started talking, when he asked me if I was attracted to him. I said yes, we talked for a long time, and it just kind of snowballed from there. And it culminated in a very nice, however brief, affair. We are still really good friends and we still think the other is hot, but he has a girlfriend and I am attached.
Now, maybe, if you both have computers...maybe you could get on messenger and talk that way. You're not face to face, and you can pretty much say what you want. My situation was a good one. However, not all situations like this end up good. Follow your heart, dear, maybe drop hints. Place your hand on his shoulder or something...and watch his reaction. Can you ask one of your mutual freinds to help out in this instance? Maybe you need a messenger. Good luck, dear.

Answer 5

I was in your situation....I have a very close guy friend but a couple of years ago, I too started to see him differently...As you said when he smiled my heard skipped a beat....So one day I decided to tell him just how I felt, but I couldn't say it to his face, so I wrote a letter to him...It was very long...I couldn't get to the point, but eventually I did..I gave it to him like nothing big was in it...He read it and we talked about it...We agreed that being friends would have been better and to this day we are really close...I do have love for him but it's a different type of love.....Just be straight with him...If he likes you then go for it but if he doesn't then don't lose a good friend....

Answer 6

Seriously I think one of you have to take the initiative coz if both of you is not going to do something to this relationship, then both of you won't know how the other party feel for you. It is better to make a move now rather than regret later. But you should also bear in mind the fact that he may just treat you as one of his close friends and the relationship may changed after you confess your feeling to him.

Answer 7

I understand your situation... I'm sure you know that many people will say things like, just tell him, or honesty is the best policy, or what have you got to lose, but I totally understand that it is very difficult to do just that - tell him.

What I would suggest is, let a mutual friend whom you trust, do the asking/testing when you are not around. Let your friend (preferably someone close to him) casually ask him, "what do you think of so-and-so? Would you like to go out with her?" something along those lines.

Answer 8

GO for it!!!!!! The best relationships are friends first.. You both, Know how you feel on a lot of things.. You don't have to be something your not.. Because, He knows the real you.. You should tell him...Just do it..Get it over with.. Good luck.. I don't think you need it. Your friends even see it... Have a good one..

Answer 9

I can answer this from personal experience. Two years ago, I met my best friend, and we were instantly very close friends. Over time, it became apparent that we both had feelings for each other, but we never acted on them. It came down to me not wanting to risk losing her in my life. Now she is dating one of my ex-roommates, and we both have acknowledged our feelings for each other, but it is too late for us. We still are very close friends, but I regret everyday not having made a move for it. The reward is worth the risk believe me, if only to not have to live with that regret.

Answer 10

Take the initiative.

1)if u tell him n if he freaks out,then u can calm him all down n let him know that loving someone is a 2 way thing,n no matter what u respect his decision (if he treats u just as a frd) n then will let him know that the 2 of u r frds.

2)if u tell him n he feels the same then bingo!be happy!!