Some things just tick you off just because it makes sense in your head why it annoys you so much. I'll tell you the situation: Girlfriend wants to have a "double birthday party" with one of her friends. Well I told her that those never work out well. But shes going to do it anyway, which I was cool with. Well we are like best friends dating so I've never intentionally missed her birthday party in three (maybe) 4 years! But shes having an all girls "slumber party", which was still okay... She told me on speaker phone that she was going to just have a double date movie thing with me and her, her friend, and her friend's boyfriend, which doesn't seem right to me. I got quiet after I heard this cause I admitted that I didn't like the idea, but now my girlfriends friend just blurts out "oh don't be mad, thats a stupid reason to be mad" And it just got me. Its like the were siding against me just like that! They weren't, it just feels like it to me. I felt seriously one sided. Caused anger.
2007-01-05 15:11:30 · 4 answers · asked by Tom 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
It just felt like just like that my girlfriends friend just took over my gf's ideas and completely changed her mind and is pushing me out of the situation, when I've been the one hanging out with her and talkign to her about it.Know what I mean? Why does it tick me off (very very dangrously) bad?
2007-01-05 15:13:22 · update #1
I don't mean to keep adding more information, but also, have you ever experience anger like this, or is it just me? Like having a best friend/girlfreind that you are very close to then someone not very close to her taking over her thoughts and ideas and changing her ... ideas! Ugh..(the main point of me asking this question)
2007-01-05 15:21:39 · update #2
Thanks Rudy, and you're right, I wanted to take her out to dinner for her birthday. And buy her something "shiny" ^_^. I can still do that, but apparently she'd be having a slumber party, movie day double date, AND dinner (so basically she already has everything planned).
2007-01-05 15:38:43 · update #3
Dude, we (guys) have all been there: at the mercy of the girl's stupid friends. The one's who always know your feelings better than you do. However, you must realize that to hold a rose, we must sometimes deal with thorns.
Personally, I don't blame you for getting angry. It sounds like your girlfriend somehow got caught up in this whole 'gotta be my own woman' mood, and you get to pay the price. I'm also willing to bet you had something special planned with your girl (not to mention the fact that you are probably very annoyed with her friend and would probably not make the best company).
That said, have you communicated your feelings about this with your girlfriend? I hate to admit, but if you're this angry, then you probably have really strong feelings about your girlfriend, and I wouldn't put it past the most emotionally balanced girl to push a guy to find out just how much he feels about her.
If that was confusing, it's because you're a guy and we don't think like they do. They want to know how we feel, and we want to know what they want us to do.
My suggestion is to take a day to chill. No phone calls, e-mail, texts for at least 18 hours so you can go in with your head screwed on straight. Ask her to meet you, alone, and explain how you feel about the entire thing. Spill the beans about how you feel about the birthday slumber party extravaganza, the double date, and how you feel the girlfriend tried to put you into a corner. She may or may not agree, and that's cool, but she really needs to respect your feelings.
If that doesn't work, there's always man's ultimate trump card: jewelry, really expensive jewelry... and flowers.
2007-01-05 15:30:03 · answer #1 · answered by Rudy G 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
That's understandable, getting roped into things makes me mad too. I have a friend who makes plans and then doesn't show up for them. The best advice I have is a deep breath or two, explain that you are not mad but just not enthusiastic about the plans. Offer to do something special with her before she goes out with her friends or after, but that she should respect that what she has planned isn't something you will enjoy so you'd like to make alternate plans while still leaving room for her and her friends.
2007-01-05 15:18:18 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
You are not happy with this situation, it doesn't matter what your girlfriend's friends say, you are upset, and you have every right to be! Let your girlfriend know (in a calm matter, of course) that you are not happy with the plans. But, you gotta think too, this is you girlfriend's party. Try seeing it as something that will make her happy.
2007-01-05 15:14:46 · answer #3 · answered by *~*RaChAel*~* 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
slap that ho
2007-01-05 15:14:42 · answer #4 · answered by joe v 3 · 0⤊ 3⤋