what do i do to assure him that i will not hurt him purposely and convince him to keep loving me?
(he had been hurt from a previous relationship)
2007-01-05 14:37:14 · 22 answers · asked by youmakemesmile :] 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
Do nothing but be yourself. If you play into it now, it will get worse. His insecurities are his baggage and he needs to check his baggage at the front door of the relationship. Have him find a therapist, support group, self help books, whatever it takes, HIMSELF. Don't carry his baggage for him or allow it into your life.
2007-01-05 14:41:00 · answer #1 · answered by vtctom 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
There are no guarantees. That's the interesting part of being in love. You take a chance on that person. Everyone is scared to be hurt. Whether a first time burn or a fourth. It's hard every time.
That is what he has to realize for himself. He has to know that you're worth taking that risk again... and all you can do is show him you love him.. for him.
2007-01-05 14:42:44 · answer #2 · answered by ? 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If he really is scared of being hurt again, I think you should have some success from treating him well and respecting him, and embracing his vulnerablilites. If you're constantly nice to him, I think you can make him realize that you aren't like that other woman. If he starts to look glum, try holding him or cuddling with him. It's pretty easy to do, and he will come around IF he likes you. Don't wait TOO long . . . but give it a chance. Good luck!
2007-01-05 14:43:07 · answer #3 · answered by anonymous 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Please don't tell me this guy won't commit to you because he's scared of being hurt!!! The reason I say this is because I've been there, done that. Yes, I understand he's been hurt before and is trying to protect his heart...BUT YOU'VE BEEN HURT BEFORE TOO AND YOU STILL GOT BACK OUT THERE RIGHT? So I say that if he really loves you, then he should have no problem taking that risk for you.
Guys say that stuff when they don't want to hurt the girl. Sometimes they really have been hurt, but if that's the only reason they won't commit, it's a bunch of bs...Sorry sweetie. I'm not saying walk away, but don't wait around on him for too long. I waited around for 3 years and it never happened.
2007-01-05 14:40:36 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 1⤋
Hey let him know how you are a totally different person, And explain how much you do care about him.
Talk about if he keeps his guard up always, he won't be able to be happy with anyone. It will be hard for him, but continue to just have a nice relationship, and you both will feel secure and comfortable with each other after awhile-Yes, just keep doing well and he will feel comfortable naturally with time
Make sure to be mindful of what's happened to him before, and that he is soft and sensitive in a certain way, and it's very understandable.
Keep being truthful about how you feel and be understanding and just naturally have a nice relationship.
2007-01-05 14:52:00 · answer #5 · answered by carrington 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
"Scared of being hurt again.", That is a guys way of saying, "I'm not THAT into you, so we can spend some time together(I'll use you), but if opportunity knocks, I'm still gonna go do what ever I want, with who ever I want. And this is my way of doing it and having my cake (you or someone else) and eating it too(you or someone else) Guys aren't that deep. He's trying to be nice.
2007-01-05 14:47:04 · answer #6 · answered by 123..WAIT! 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The one thing in a relationship like this is trust. Be sure that he knows that your feelings are genuine and that you want to be with him no matter what. be patient and just talk to him and most of all be there for him. I know that this sounds like a lot on your part, but you must realize what he has been through. this kind of hurt is something that will take time for him to get over. I hope that both of you can work this out. Most of all draw strength from your love for each other.
2007-01-05 14:43:50 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
He's still scared, sweetie. Just keep reassuring him that you would never hurt him on purpose. He still needs to get over what happened with him in his previous relationship, so leave him be for now.
2007-01-05 14:39:24 · answer #8 · answered by *~*RaChAel*~* 5 · 0⤊ 1⤋
If he liked you really liked you he would go for it.Sounds like he isn't sure about you as a person.Men always think that there is something greener on the other side.
2007-01-05 14:45:48 · answer #9 · answered by Teenie 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Just tell him that u're not like his other girlfriend and will always go with him in many situation.Or just tell him to forget the past and live hapily with u!
2007-01-05 14:47:47 · answer #10 · answered by Alex 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋