Would you confess to a new lover how many past sexual relationships you`d had?

Question

I admitted to my fella that i`d had over a 200 and he finished the relationship!!I mean whats his problem?He asked and i told.I thought honesty was the best policy

RAGE997.......bore off knobrot

Answer 1

blimey 200 is a reasonable amount. he was probably a virgin until he met u so i reckon ur better off wivout him. personally i`d go for another 200. the only time a guy should have a problem wiv how many guys a girl has been wiv is about 50,000. i`d probably question that one! wen the number gets to 50,000 they tend to walk like john wayne wiv extra bowed legs :)

Answer 2

You know what I had the same problem, i was in the forces and slept with so many men over the three years, when I left I found that no-one I wanted a relationship would take me seriously if I told them, I met my husband and told him straight away, get it out in the open as soon as you know about each other the better, who the hell cares about what went on in the past, at the end of the day he can't go comparing himsrelf to all the men you have slept with, he's clearly not worth the effort, hold on and you will find the right person, if it was a guy he'd have expected a pat on the back, why must women be different?

Answer 3

I've been honest with this question in the past and it has turned round and bitten me on the **** and I have had it thrown in my face for years afterwards. Not all partners would chuck it back at you and constantly bring up your past but there are plenty who have insecurities and would deifnitely find it very difficult to deal with. I don't believe in lying and would like to think I am always honest but I think with this question you need to be a bit careful. You should hopefully know your partner well enough to know the sort of reaction and any partner who is delving into your past and asking the question is insecure to start with so maybe bend the truth slighty. Divide the total but 5 or something. Although in this case I think you better divide by 10 and hold your breath. 200? I think even I would be a little put off by that. It would certainly be a lot to live up to.

Honesty with a little bending if need be.

Answer 4

No offense, but with an answer of over 200, my impression would probably be the same. I would judge you as a **** and then assume you have a couple of STD's. I'm not saying this to be mean, I'm just trying to give you some perspective. When you have been with that many people and your new lover asks, just tell him that you're not sure. That way, he'll know you've been around but it's not as shocking as telling someone you've been with over 200. Maybe you need to slow down and enjoy dating for a while.

Answer 5

Before confessing something like that to a new lover, you have to trust that person before confessing something personal.

I don't think he was upset with you necessarily, but through experience not only are guys terrified of possible diseases due to many exposures of sexual partners, but most guys are insecure about how they will measure up to your past experiences. This guy probably knew that no matter what, if he had a sexual relationship with you, you would subconsciously be comparing him to previous partners.

I definitely don't think it was wrong that you told him. I'm a strong believer of the honesty policy myself, but next time wait until you're sure that it's worth telling him.

Also remember, guys like to feel special just like us, they don't just want to feel like one of the 200.

When you meet a guy that really matters, something like previous sexual engagements won't matter to him.

Good Luck. Hope this helps.

Answer 6

Ever heard the expression "discretion is the better part valour", well in this its very true. Honesty is good to a point but sometimes unfortunately you have bend the truth not lie necessary but either omit certain details or downplay things.

Personally your answer would not bother me because I worked in the adult entertainment industry and I know and been with women who had as many if not more partners.

I just hope played safe during all sexual escapades.

Answer 7

Sometimes honesty is the best policy but on things like this I would lie a bit or a lot

Answer 8

Men ask that question hoping you'll give us the ans we want to hear.....none!!!! Ive never been one for accepting women who claim to have slept around as its unhealthy and unnecessary!!! We don't necessarily want virgins just women who have had sex in relationships - doesn't matter if you've done it 1000 times as long as its not with a 1000 people. That's just my interpretation. Good luck finding Mr right cause it obvious Mr right now isn't the logical option!!!

Answer 9

Well you need to get checked out and make sure everything is coo with you. He probably doesn't like women who have had more then 10 lovers. I mean you did good by being honest he just couldn't handle how many you've had I guess

Answer 10

In the past I chose to keep that information to myself, but me and my current bf started out talking about everything. i don't know why but i told him about my past and i'm in the same boat as you. I don't know if it's been quite 200 but its been close LOL. And once I told him he told me he had been with over 200. So with all that said, forget him. He knew you had a past before him