On New Year's Day, I came across my husband with his phone. Surprisingly he looked guilty. I casually asked if he had received any texts. He replied, yes, from a contact wishing him a happy new year. Something in his manner made me suspicious. I asked if I could see the text. He refused, then muttered something about a surprise. I said Christmas was over - surely he wasn't planning more surprises. He was so obviously lying that I calmly and firmly asked to see the text. He absolutely refused and tried to put the phone away. I tried to grab it from him. Following a scuffle he escaped to delete the text. Later, after a huge scene, I begged him to tell me. Eventually he said it was a text from a female colleague wishing him a happy new year and xxx. He thought I would be cross. I don't know whether to believe him. I would have been cross, but it sounds innocent enough. My instinct is that he is hiding something much bigger from me. The text is deleted. What to do?
2007-01-05 05:13:36 · 17 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
He should have let you see it, then he could have sent her one back, from both of you.
2007-01-05 05:22:06 · answer #1 · answered by The BudMiester 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Please take it from someone that has been through very similar experiences, if your gut feeling is telling you to LISTEN, then please don't disregard that. There is a genuine reason that you are getting this suspicion. Has he been unfaithful to you (or in other relationships prior to you) before? That would be a very big red flag to start with.
A couple of years ago I suspected something about my child's father. I would ask him about my suspicions and he always said I was wrong. However, my gut feeling was so strong and I'd learned through the years to listen to it. One early morning while he was still sleeping, i checked the history tab of his computer. Sure enough, I was right!! It was also somehting so horrible that any woman in her right mind would have left this man, which is exactly what I did. I have never regreted it either.
Yes, it is good to trust in our significant other, however, it is also good to be wise and to trust that God-given instinct that we all have. You both many need to take measures to save this relationship if you feel it is worth it. Good luck. My heart is with you!
2007-01-05 05:22:25 · answer #2 · answered by Singthing 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
oh bless every woman's worsted night mare i feel for you.you know deep down sweetheart that if he had nothing to hide he would off showed you this text.don't be hes fool next time he falls asleep or has a shower i know you shouldn't but hey.look through is phone and keep an eye on him i wish you all the luck in the world and hope hes telling you the truth ..
2007-01-05 05:34:51 · answer #3 · answered by skye 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Can´t tell about you, but when this happened to me, I later found out he was actually cheating on me. And we aren´t 2gether anymore.
My boyfriend now, whenever a message like that happens, he shows me, even knowing I won´t like so I can keep the track of thing and she shows me I can have absolute trust on him.
Afterall, there always is a b itch trying to mess up our good relationships.
2007-01-05 05:19:13 · answer #4 · answered by Lucianna_ 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Keep a good eye on him and what I do when I feel somethingis wrong, I wait for my hubby to go take a shower and quickly go through his wallet and his phone he never knew the difference when he got out...lol...Oh, and drop in on him at wqork one day and stayin the back so he can't see you for a bout 5-10 mintes just to see if he is flirting or doing anything you should know about...Muha! =P
2007-01-05 05:23:14 · answer #5 · answered by bootylicious 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I agree with cookie check his numbers & texts the next time he is in shower
you know your husband best why has he given his number out this will eat away at you find out now tell him you are upset & need a explanation
2007-01-05 06:05:34 · answer #6 · answered by miss smidgey 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
That makes me so mad! What a chicken to delete the message! Find out who this "colleague" is. And why does she have his cellphone number? If it was innocent he would have showed you. What makes it worst is that he tried to lie about it first. Check his cellphone records. You have to get to the bottom of this.
2007-01-05 05:19:32 · answer #7 · answered by DollieDee 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
well you have every right to be suspicious about it from the way he ran off an deleted it. look thru his phone while he is sleeping see if there is any numbers that you dont know or women in there you dont know write them down an call them you have the right to do so he is your husband. stand your ground and talk to him about it. i feel for ya girl
2007-01-05 05:19:41 · answer #8 · answered by " Dixieland Delight " 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
tell him you want an honest answer and threaten him with a lie detector, thats what i did and it all came spilling out, he had been seeing someone for 8 months, he was 44 and she was 18, needless to say he is my ex now and i have moved on, good luck and take care xx
2007-01-05 05:25:07 · answer #9 · answered by MAD FEMALE 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
id hate to be in your shoes right now!!! but you know your husband better than anybody, and you know what they say? always trust your gut feeling. you need to get to the bottom of this before it eats away at you, you know he was hiding something? but what? men do tell white lies to protect their women, but i think it only makes matters worse, has he got reason to think you would be cross???
2007-01-05 05:18:57 · answer #10 · answered by ann_jacques 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
i think that if you think its an affair id seize a rite moment and wait for a text to follow through and read it wen hes not lookin but other then that i have no idea
2007-01-05 05:23:44 · answer #11 · answered by Break Me Down 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋