The urge to hurt someone you love?

Question

Why would a man want to truly hit, spank, etc. . .the woman he was with while playing around with bondage during intercourse?
I can see playing but, is that so far as to make it apparent that he DEFINTLY does not love her?

Why would a man want to do this to the woman he loves?

Answer 1

Ok trust me on this, I have actual experience with this whole situation.

A man that gets off by causing a woman pain, in any way, has deeply rooted issues with women. A guy I seriously dated, in 2nd grade a girl he liked humiliated him badly in front of the whole class. He denies it but I think it messed him up so bad, he couldn't have "vanilla" sex. He could only get off if he spanked, tied up, humiliated, or tortured a woman. Its all he read about, watched on video, nothing else did it for him.

If he is "playing around", watch to see how far it goes. No one, and I mean no one, wants to hurt someone they love. If they hurt you, they don't love you.

Proceed with caution.

Answer 2

This is not to justify the behavior, but merely to attempt to explain. For those playing with bondage in the first place, the feeling of power over the partner is sexually stimulating. This same feeling of power is heightened by control over the partner's body. Spanking thus becomes both a way to have control over the partner's body but also because it is a form of discipline, it gives a sense of power over the partner's actions as well. The power person can feel that if the partner does not act, behave, perform perfectly then he can spank for the disappointment - and that feeds back into the sexual power curve and heightens his sexuality.

Fortunately, there are some who get the same sexual surge by being controlled and knowing they "must obey" and have no say in what happens to them - and that, too, is sexually arousing.

Just make sure you get the right peg in the right hole - if the partners don't match up, someone is going to be really unhappy.

Answer 3

No sane person would like to HURT the persons they love.

Making a person uncomfortable and inflicting pain in order to satisfy a need the person feels can be misunderstood, but hardly be wrong, as long as no additional injuries occur.

Would you feed the hungry, even though some think the food you are supplying is not the best?

Would you hold a person who is sad?

Would you tickle someone to get them to lighten up?

Will you spank someone because it makes them to feel good?

As best solutions it may not be it in some people's opinion, LOTS of people think this disease is what makes their lives worth living!

The word that scared me in your question is truly. It all has to be a game, and consentual. If it is done in anger or to truly punish a person, the relationship turned a corner it should not have.

The guy should get help and not play untill the issue is resolved.

Answer 4

in case you ever have those emotions, then seem interior your self and confirm even if what you opt for to do is volatile to you or perhaps others. What you're questioning is what you opt for to imagine. the basically one that can help you with one of those quandary is your self. in case you opt for to damage your self, are you able to really imagine of how all and sundry will imagine of then you? are you able to imagine how your spouse and children will experience, or others, in case you went and killed your self or some different person? are you able to imagine what that's opt for to handle that burden of killing someone and wearing it on your shoulders or perhaps comprehend the discomfort that man or woman would bypass through. imagine about those questions, then confirm what you opt for to do. i have had those concepts as well, yet i assumed about the questions that I advised you, and that i cried. If all else fails, do as you want to do, and search for suggestion from a persons help. bypass tell a buddy, even the guy you want to kill, and tell them about each and every thing. the guy who you want to work out useless might want to hear to you, and basically communicate issues through with them, that's the perfect problem to do. Bottling up emotions like which may bring about you doing unjust movements not basically to others, yet harsh, merciless emotions will basically supply you which have of suicide. basically imagine all the effects, and then those evil, terrible, disgusting urges will leave you. I assure you. i have helped my friends, a pal, or perhaps myself, and now i am hoping that this helps you.

Answer 5

You hooked up again with someone who is not a good "fit" for you, at least mentally. These are some of the things that you find out about someone in the first couple of encounters and then re-evaluate your relationship....good luck.

Answer 6

My lady likes to be spanked very hard occasionally. I used to have am issue with it, but since she likes it now I was a paddle.

Answer 7

It's fantasy role playing, there are alot of women that like that. I don't think you can say he doesn't love her. If consenting adults want to mutually do that stuff than let them do it. As long as they don't cross any lines that thier partner has laid down.

Answer 8

b cuz sumtimes the b*tches need to be housecleaned or a good tune up...nome sayin???

a good slap never hurt anyone, in fact the chains and whips is what keeps yall in line....like a horse

Answer 9

If she enjoys it, then spanking her is an act of love.

Answer 10

there is no love there only control. wants to take you self worth a drive it into the ground. get away from this jerk. don't allow yourself to be dragged to the gutter