yesterday he came home from work . he had bad day he when to the bath room but i forget to buy toilet paper and he got mad then he comes out of the bathroom to tell me the that house look crap. i also have a 1month old infant. he started yelling at me and cursing too. so right now when are still sleeping in the same bed even though i really dont wont to the only i do is the baby sleep in there.
2007-01-05 04:36:56 · 25 answers · asked by rosemary j 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
i also attend school
2007-01-05 04:42:59 · update #1
Here's an idea why doesn't he go buy toilet paper?
2007-01-05 04:40:00 · answer #1 · answered by hunter 2 · 3⤊ 1⤋
Well learn how to spell first. Then..... and take this advice from someone who has been there and done that for many years.
Since you are a stay at home mom with a 1 month old infant, I'm sure your man is feeling somewhat neglected, like as if he's not getting all the attention anymore. Anyways Waa Waa Waa on him for that. However, since you are home all day, you need to find the energy in yourself to have the house cleaned, have the toilet paper filled, etc... Do this, and trust me, this works. My wife and I do it, and we dont fight. Make a checklist of things to do around the house that YOU can do while he is at work. On a daily basis, the dishes should be washed, and clothes picked up the bed made. Weekly or twice a week laundry is done and you chek all the bathrooms for trash and TP. Weekly the bathrooms get cleaned, the vacuuming gets done and the floors swept and cleaned. He in turn should be earning the money to pay the bills, keep a roof over your head, the heat on, gas in the car, food in the fridge, etc... When he gets home today, sit him down and talk with him, not TO him, but with him about what is going on at the house and in your marriage. Because if you end up getting lazy enough, and become unappreciative of him, that is if he does work hard, he will leave you. Trust me, I left my ex wife for that very reason. But you have to have the mentality that if you stay home, you take care of the house. Plus it keeps you busy. I have 4 kids and yes, they are all plenty of hard work, especially the first 2 years, but it gets easier. I promise...
2007-01-05 12:50:50 · answer #2 · answered by jeff the drunk 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Most of people think their home is their heaven because there are no place like home to go to. There are no excuse for anyone who live in a so calls home somewhere, and didn’t enjoy it. I don’t care if it a small or not so nice home. You can make your house to calls your home by make it to be. You have that advance for this to happen more than he could. Your so call baby’s daddy (I don’t know why you call him like that for) is working all day. Of cause, he wanted to come home to a clean house and resting from a hard day of work. If you want him to be pleased with you then that is a small thing he was asked you to do, for pleasing this man. Relationship is works both ways. For your baby sake that have to grow up with both of you, both of you need to do something about it to start, to have this good home. You were saying, “ He was mad” at you about a dirty house and no toilet paper. If you don’t take it on how you feel, about all this what just happened, you will find the answer to your problem. First, I will start clean the house then cooking a nice dinner, and when you finish cleaning up, tell him you need to go to the store to get what you both need for the house; such as toilet papers. This would source your problem better than have to put up with everything else that will come along later, believe me. You could go to the store to get some fresh air and a break from being in the house all day. He can enjoy a nice clean house, and being with the baby after his dinner. Hoping he might think about how he has been so ugly to you. It is not matter if he didn’t, you still love him anyway and be the best of yourself. You will have a chance to come home to a nice clean house, and knowing that you also work more than two jobs at home. Any husband should appreciate a woman like you. You will feel good about yourself more, as the same time you would be doing a good deed by keeping everyone else happy in your own home. The next thing to do is set up yourself a plan to what you need to do everyday. It is not that hard because a lot of people were doing it.
2007-01-05 13:18:16 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I know how you feel. I am sick and tired of these guys who take off all day, and have no idea what its like to care for a newborn or any age kids as a matter of fact. Tell him to get off his As* and go to the store and buy the stuff you need and to help out around the house instead of him Bit*hing about it to you. If he is treating you like this, you don't need it or him. It will cause you to feel neglected and resentful. He needs to also change his ways and start being a bit more caring and understanding, and if he doesn't, then you need to get out. Even if you have a baby, if he doesn't make a effort for you it will only get worse. You guys need to talk and hash things out and try to work it out. But if things don't change you should get up with your baby and leave before you end up with him 10 years later and even more unhappy and then it will be harder to leave, so fix the problem now before it spirals out of control. Put your foot down and don't let anyone talk to you that way. Remember, You are not Superwoman, and you are not his maid. It is a 50/50 relationship and he helped to put that baby there, so he needs to be a bit more supportive!!! Another thing that you could try if it keeps up, and that's to just go on strike, (besides caring for the baby) Don't cook, don't clean, don't shop and don't do his laundry. Things start to suck for him if he has no clean undies. Let him know how much you do, teach him a lesson.
I clean, cook and all the other stuff a housewife does and my home is clean, but there will always be off days, and if he can't help out occasionally and if he verbally abuses you because you forgot something, then you don't need a guy like that. Good Luck.
By the way, Just because you are a stay at home mom right now and he works, that does not give him the right to act like this either. You are also going to school that is the same as working. and being home with a newborn is a fulltime job, and don't let anyone tell you otherwise. I have been home with my 2 kids and I work from home too and it never stops. I am non stop from morning to night. The man goes to work and has no idea how tough it is. Just because he is out at work, in reality he is getting a break from the home and the work. You're not, you're on call 24/7!!!!
2007-01-05 12:45:20 · answer #4 · answered by MRod 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
These things happen, its not the end of the world. I raised two kids and am raising a grandson, only now I work and my husband is at home. The house is not clean a lot of the time, and I don't always have a good day at work and come home bitchy, but you know what, life is too short to sweat the small things. But we have developed our routine and it works for us. I only go to wal mart once a week to stock up on things like toilet paper, and I start a list every week so when I go I get everything we need and we never run out of necessities like TP or toothpaste. But you are young and it will take time for you to figure these things out for yourself.
2007-01-05 12:45:50 · answer #5 · answered by smartypants909 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It sounds like the 2 of you need to have a talk about things. You said he had a bad day so he probably took it out on you but didn't really mean to. I think you should talk to him about your feelings and how busy you are with the baby all day...also it's only been a month. Let him know what you are going through and tell him that you understand he is working hard to take care of you and you appreciate him. You guys just need to communicate a little better and don't let little things get out of hand. Talk things out instead of arguing about them.
2007-01-05 13:42:57 · answer #6 · answered by vanhammer 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Did you notice that you had nothing to wipe with? And I remember having a 1mo but there is always time to straighten up. He works and that means your job is to take care of the house. I'm trying to sound old fashioned, I work a full time job, take care of an 11 yo and keep my house as neat as I can. I wish i could stay at home with a baby.
But that doesn't mean that he should freak out on you. You're probably going through some PPD. And I'll bet he doesn't wake up in the middle of the night with the baby either.
2007-01-05 12:41:29 · answer #7 · answered by FaerieWhings 7 · 0⤊ 2⤋
Just tell him to use the newspaper - you are looking after a young baby and the housework can wait. The baby is more important at the moment and if the house is that bad he could always pick up the duster himself!!
2007-01-05 12:42:25 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
I am a stay at home mom with two baby's I know the feelings some you are tried and you forget things and you just don't want to clean on some days.You just have to let him know what's going on in your world because men don't understand all the things we go throught with the kids and them.
2007-01-05 12:53:57 · answer #9 · answered by Tangula G 1 · 0⤊ 1⤋
just bacause he had a bad day doesnt mean he needs to take it out on u. u are only one person with little time he should be thankful for what u do being a mom is hard enough but to clean school and put up with his **** is even harder u shouldnt put up with that
and u dont have to
2007-01-05 14:20:40 · answer #10 · answered by debbie o 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
That's life in Section 8 housing.
2007-01-05 12:39:27 · answer #11 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 3⤋