An atheist was taking a walk through the woods.
"What majestic trees! What powerful rivers! What beautiful animals!" he said
To himself.
As he continued walking alongside the river he
heard a rustling in the
bushes. Turning to look, he saw a 7 foot grizzly
charging towards him. He ran as fast as he could up the path.
Looking over his shoulder he saw that the bear was
closing in on him. His heart was pumping frantically and he tried to run
even faster. He tripped and fell on the ground. He rolled over to pick
himself up but saw the bear
raising his paw to take a swipe at him.
At that instant the atheist cried out: "Oh my
God...!"
Time stopped.
The bear froze.
The forest was silent.
It was then that a bright light shone upon t he
Man and a voice came out of the sky saying: "You deny my existence for all of
these years, teach others
I don't exist and even credit creation to a cosmic accident. Do you expect
me to help you out of this predicament?
2007-01-05 03:19:48 · 23 answers · asked by unknown 4 in Society & Culture ➔ Religion & Spirituality
Am I to
count you as a believer?"
The atheist looked directly into the light and
said:
"It would be hypocritical of me to suddenly ask you to treat me
As a Christian now, but perhaps, could you make the BEAR a Christian?"
"Very well," said the voice. The light went out, and the sounds of the forest
resumed. And then the bear lowered his paw, bowed his head and spoke:
"Lord, bless this food which I am about to receive and
for which I am truly thankful, Amen. "
2007-01-05 03:19:56 · update #1
Seen it a thousand times. Got any from this Melania.
Love and blessings Don
2007-01-05 03:23:50 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
No, thats not right. The bear would have knocked the dudes head off for not being Christian. Not only that, times never stopped, and last but not least, God would have better things to do then make some atheist feel bad about himself and then help him.
2007-01-05 15:31:39 · answer #2 · answered by Jonny G 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Actually, the atheist yelled out "help!" or "ahh!" (or something intelligent) and was killed and eaten by the bear. The xtian yelled out "oh my god!" and was killed and eaten by the bear. The difference is that the xtian realised he was wrong all along. He's just as much bear food as anyone else.
2007-01-05 11:26:36 · answer #3 · answered by Gene 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
That's a real funny story. Interesting that you are very bright and intelligent the way that you speak. God has given you so much wisdom may I ask howlong you have been a christian?
2007-01-05 11:36:22 · answer #4 · answered by precious 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Your point is...? You know as well as I do such a fable is just rhetoric. Otherwise, atheists would be eaten by bears and Christians would never have their churches destroyed by tornadoes - which happens in Texas about once a year.
Sorry, even your own belief system doesn't work this way.
2007-01-05 11:22:11 · answer #5 · answered by texascrazyhorse 4 · 3⤊ 2⤋
That was a good one. Say it in Arnold's voice.
I guess it is one of those Christian parable jokes with a moral at the end. I always thought they were an insult to my intelligence.
2007-01-05 11:21:27 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 1⤋
Then, the bear took the atheist back to his lair and tortured him in the ways of the Inquisition and then burned him at the stake.
I'd stick with the regular bear over the Christian one, thanks.
2007-01-05 11:26:13 · answer #7 · answered by Phoenix, Wise Guru 7 · 1⤊ 1⤋
That would have been a dead bear, That's why I carry a sidearm when backpacking in the woods.
2007-01-05 11:31:00 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Bears and atheists? I thought it was lions that ate christians.
2007-01-05 11:25:29 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
I love jokes that aren't even remotely funny. It's very postmodern.
2007-01-05 11:34:06 · answer #10 · answered by mutterhalls 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋