He has been telling me for 2 years he is going to go to school to be a chef, but he hasent done it, he gets job but he quits or gets fired in a month or so.. i dont know what to do?? he does give me alot of love though.
2007-01-05 00:28:46 · 17 answers · asked by metal_soccer 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
After 8 years with a man who has more excuses than ambition to work, I feel qualified to answer this question. Is there enough love to overcome his inability to provide a home for future children? Is there enough love when you are scraping the bottom of your purse for gas/bus fare when he smokes/plays poker/plays golf/plays Nevada/plays scratch tickets.....whatever. Is there enough love when you come home from work, too tired to face housework and kids and bills and all there is .... is housework and kids and bills. Is there enough love for him to get off of his ***, act like a responsible adult and provide for himself before you end up paying for the privilige of his love. Get yourself a real man, or play but keep your own apartment and pay your own bills, not his.
2007-01-05 00:38:11 · answer #1 · answered by Lady Godiva 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Whatever you do, do not move in with this man until he is bringing in some money, you will end up paying for everything and supporting him while he stays at home like a lazy bum. If he had started chef school 2 years ago he would almost be at the end of his course by now, he obviously has no ambition or desire to succeed in life, basically no desire to work at all. Tell him that once he has a job and has stayed in the job for a decent amount of time then you will move in with him. Don't do it, I am not being horrible or mean but I have been there, I supported an ex for 2 years while he stayed at home smoking dope all day and then to top it all he stole £600 from my bank account. We did not stay together for long after that.
2007-01-05 00:32:18 · answer #2 · answered by sparkleythings_4you 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Don't move in with him.... You need more than love to make a real go of it..... If you do move in with him you will get sick of it. Never having any money or being able to do things, pay bills, etc unless you provide it... He has set himself up to be a failure over and over and over again. If he doesn't get it by the time he is 24 then this cycle will just continue and you will end up not even liking him anymore. The burden on your shoulders will be heavy and life will start being "no fun"... Tell him he has one month to enroll in his chef school or you are going to leave him behind because you want things out of life. He keeps setting himself up with jobs that he hates so he can get fired and blame everyone else for his misfortune. This behavior will never change. Give him one month to get off his rear or tell him bye bye. He is indigent by design
2007-01-05 00:37:36 · answer #3 · answered by Lea 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Why are you still with this guy. Ohh I know he "give you a lot of love". Do you mean he is good in bed? Do you mean he supports you when you cry.
This relationship need some saving. Two years you have been putting up with him and no progress as yet...
You are suffering from lack of self confidence. Do not move in with him it is not worth it.
If you truly believe there is some glimmer of hope for this love this relationship can be saved, but honestly he is a bummer. Move on with your life.
http://www.affiliatehood.com/save-your-relationship.html
2007-01-05 00:48:10 · answer #4 · answered by My2cents 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Why do you want to move in with him? You can still date him and not be under the same roof. Take care of yourself first. Don't support someone else who isn't willing to support themself. If you are meant to be together you will be no matter where you live. Love is a wonderful thing but it doesn't pay the bills.
2007-01-05 00:35:39 · answer #5 · answered by alymarie 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Love doesn't pay the bills. Wait until he can prove that he can at least hold down a job and pay bills. I was in a situation where he was self employed and money was hard to come by. It ruined the relationship and my credit. Be careful.
2007-01-05 00:32:52 · answer #6 · answered by motrouble 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Unless you are prepared to be the soul provider, then you may want to either give him some ultimatums or find out if there's a reason he wont be a more productive person. Love doesn't pay the bills.
2007-01-05 00:33:08 · answer #7 · answered by annette_642 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Apart from giving yu love your person should be able to financially support you as well. Do not move in with him unless and until he gets a somewhat steady job.
2007-01-05 00:32:54 · answer #8 · answered by AAK 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Of course he is going to give you alot of love that is all he has to offer. I'm sorry but if I was you, I would tell your boyfriend to shape up or ship out. I mean why can't he stick to a job and ride it through
2007-01-05 00:32:29 · answer #9 · answered by Ana T 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
if he really loves you, he wouldn't have delayed his life commitments for years. he would have gone straight ahead and pursue a chef diploma or something, or even find a stable job within his capability, so that he can be sure that you don't suffer with him. listen to your heart. since you're not willing, then don't, if not your reluctance may lead to regret. hope things will change for the better :)
2007-01-05 00:30:46 · answer #10 · answered by Melody 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋