I need some people's opinions....is age 17 to young to move out? and is age 18 to young to get married?

Question

I am a 16 year old female...I am fed up with my house. I have a step mother that doesn't want their marriage to work but my dad does because he loves her. I have 2 step brothers that are always doing their mother's evil work....basically getting me P.O. so I will go off on them and/or her. Then we can have a fight and no matter what I do, my dad gets blamed for it from my step mother. And I am just fed up, I told my dad that I am going to move out ASAP, I still love him and I'll call him but...is age 17 to young to move out? And I am in love with the one God had destined for me...we both love each other and we'd both kill ourselves if we weren't a couple...he is about to propose to me- but he has to get enough money. I don't know when he will, which means it will be a suprise still. We are both in 11th Grade and plan to get married next year sometime. Is age 18 to young to get married?

Answer 1

Move out whenever you want.....I moved out right before I turned 19...also 18 to me is to young to get married....why dont you just stay engaged for like 5 years then get married especially since money is a big issue right now...

Answer 2

I am sorry for your circumstances. It is very difficult to be 16 in this day and age. Fighting within the household makes life even more difficult.

Why not go to college far enough away so that you aren't living at home? Thereby you can achieve two things at once 1. moving out and getting away from the chaos and 2. getting a head start in life with a good foundation for your future.

What scares me is how you say "we both love each other and we'd both kill ourselves if we weren't a couple". So so much is going to change in your life in the next few years. And even if you are destined to be together for life, why rush it? You need to find YOU! Perhaps you are 'so in love' because you are so miserable at home.
18 is much too young to get married. Especially for two people with only high school educations. Money will always be an issue, how will you establish yourself? How will you ever know what you could have become?

Maybe some individual counselling would help you. A counsellor can really help you work things out and assist in the decisions you are looking at.

Good luck to you.

Answer 3

Moving out now and getting married is the very best thing you can do with your life at this point. Just imagine it.

You'll be freshly out of high school with no job or a job that pays minimum wage when you marry the penny less guy who God has destined for you.

You'll live in Section 8 housing which we all know is very desirable.

You'll start a family which you and your penny less, "destined one" won't be able to afford.

You'll struggle every week to pay for your baby's formula, most likely with food stamps.

Your every meal will be macaroni and welfare cheese. MMMM!!!

You will have to decide what's more important this week. Keeping the heat on or eating.

And the best part will be dealing with the fact that in a year, your "destined one" is out screwing anything with a pulse because he's young and that's what young men do when they finally realize they got married too young.

To fix this, he'll want to get a divorce which will put you into even more debt. Good luck getting child support from him.

Who in their right mind wouldn't want a glorious life like that?
I say go for it! It's a dream come true.

Answer 4

I know that things seem tough right now but hold on! You are going to change and grow so much in the next few years. I am 25 and I think back to some of the decisions that I made when I was 18 and I wonder what the hell I was thinking! I am a totally different person now. I started dating my fiance when I was 17 and now 7 years later, we are actually getting married. We grew together. Why not wait and grow together and make sure that this is best for the both of you. Best of luck!

Answer 5

It sounds as if you are very unhappy. Age 17 is not too young to move out, if you are mature enough to take care of yourself, but too young if you are expecting to be taken care of by someone else. I have learned that one will never be happy anywhere if first they are unhappy with them-self right where they are. These things that you are going through now are test as to how the real world is out there and how you will deal with each situation as it comes along. Don't be in a hurry and don't run away, solve your problems where you are, or you will always run head on into them again where ever you go. It or they just may have a different form or face. Your dad may need your support, just because he is the parent does not mean that he does not need you. Sit down some where private, just the two of you and have a heart to heart. Maybe the two of you together confronting this problem, may find that as a team you can solve the problem.

Answer 6

I moved out at 17. Lived in my truck for almost a year. Its not fun. Honestly you and your father should move out together. as for the whole getting married at 18 thing, are you crazy?! You haven't even lived yet. Neither one of you. Have you ever had any other boyfriends? How do you know this guy is "the one" Trust me, when you turn 21 and really start going out, a whole new world will open up for you. Never mind the fact that you should be thinking about college and not getting married. if you need to get out on your own so badly, go away to college!

Answer 7

Seems you are the only one who is on your father's side, so while you are planning to move out also take him into confidence and make him aware of the home politics and the power games happening around so that you both can together learn to break the pattern of control and manipulation.

Secondly moving out making someone else your God, will put you in a weak position, especially financially as right now it’s too early to have enough education to have good professional future prospects.

Try to hang in bit longer to be able to start a career first; starting family can certainly wait, as you already have a good thing going there.

People endure much worse situations at home just to get a good and solid professional foundation before deciding to move out on their own, as usually once you move out you will have to foot the bills, unless your father agrees to support your education for a while till you can support yourself. Hang in there, I would say.

Right now getting engaged is a better idea, especially as you are too young to clearly foresee your professional and personal life few years down the line, keep all doors open, but first try to sort out thing with your father, the one person you know for sure will love you, no matter what.

Answer 8

Yes to both your questions. You may want to move out but you just aren't ready to live alone. As for the marriage thing...how long have you even been with this guy? If its not longer than 2 years I would definitely say you are far too young and haven't been together long enough. Don't get married just so you can have sex and screw up your lives. Just think about if you really know this person well enough to spend the rest of your life together.

Answer 9

I'd say yes to both questions. Moving out is all well and good but you have to make sure you're able to cope financially and at such a young age neither of you are likely to get a job with more than minimum wage so it's gonna be incredibly difficult and could do more harm than good to your relationship.
Marrying at such a young age, even if you think he's the one is a bad idea, if he really is then waiting a few more years couldn't hurt, right?
You're both very young and until you're both stable financially, and emotionally come to think of it; then moving out isn't such a good idea. Try and stick it out for now, ignore your stepbrothers and your stepmom. Just try to be civil until you're at a stage where you can do something about it, they're not worth getting p.o. about. Good luck.

Answer 10

You have so much drama in your life right now; too many emotional stresses to make any lifetime decisions. If your father agrees to let you move out, don't get married yet. Live together if you need to because of finances, but wait for a couple years to marry. The divorce rate for young marriages is extremely high. Many times, young people get married, thinking they're in love, but it's actually to escape a bad home situation. Best of luck!

Answer 11

You can get married at 18, but just don't get married to get away from your home situation. Don't ever say that you will both kill yourself if you are not together-that is just ridiculous! Both of you need to get a job and move out together but, don't get married yet,because most marriages that start that early in life, most likely will end in divorce, give it a couple of years to really get to know each other.