cancer started in her servics and sread to her liver. it was too late when she went to hospital and died in 6 weeks after. known her for 15 years and shes been more to me than any of my three sisters could be together. she wasn't old and had two young sons. now they're left w/nobody to look after them...and i'm no help tothem, cause i dont even know how to help myself...pathetic...
2007-01-04 21:01:49 · 5 answers · asked by szilvike 1 in Health ➔ Diseases & Conditions ➔ Cancer
Hi there !!!!
I am so sorry for your loss. May the lord wrap his loving arms around you and fill you with his unconditional love.
You are not pathetic, do not put yourself down, you are a caring person, if you were not, why would you write this blog concerned about two young children that have lost their mommy, along with the other things you expressed?
I know how hard it is to have someone you love pass away. We moarn for them, but also for our loss. It is ok to feel pain, it is normal. Just remember all the wonderful times you had together, love lives on within. It is not the amount of time we spend with someone, but how they touch our soul and heart with their presence, how deeply embedded in our life they become, how we can feel them within the very essence of our soul, making them now part of us, part of our dreams and imagination .
Yet we can not cling on to a point that will not allow us to progress on in this journey we call life. We must let go. Other things, other people will come and go into our life, this is normal. Go with the flow.
You say you can not help yourself. I think you really can.
We are the arquitects of our life. With every choice we take in life, every desition is a building block for the path we are to walk on. You have the power within your soul to do what ever you want to do, reach goals. Many times we underestimate the abbilities we have to overcome obstacles and situations. Thoughts are things also, so you need to clear your mind of negative thoughts. When you find yourself talking negative to yourself, stop it ASAP, and replace it with positive thinking. This is a process that is different for everyone. I would recommend you place sticky notes around the house, like on the bathroom mirror, the refrigerator,ect.. with positve affirmations. Things like " I can take care of myself" , Life is wonderful, ect....
You could begin to write a journal, express what you feel , this way you can go back and read down the road what you wrote and you can discover so many things about yourself.
I would go to a phycologyst so you can speak to someone that will not go around and tell your story to other people, you will be able to centralize your energy and get on with your life.
About the boys, you could try to find a family member of your friend who passed on and see if they would take care of the boys, or maybe visit them from time to time.This is a hard time for them as well, and they will need all the love and attention they can get. ( more from a friendly , familiar face)
Write letters to them, with a positive tone. Try to avoid talking about their mommy in a sad way.Let them know it is ok to feel sad about their loss, to remember all the good times they had with her, and how she will live within them forever with all the love and teachings she gave them.
I wish you only the best. I Pray those children are placed in a loving home together, may the lord bless you all
remember thoughts are things
You can change if you want to, we are in charge of our lives.
Love light and peace
2007-01-04 21:22:51 · answer #1 · answered by ? 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I'm sorry for your loss. What was the question? You're right in saying that she didn't die of only breast cancer, it started in her cervix and it metastasized (spread from one part of the body to another) to her liver and the rest of her body without anyone catching it. You may want to seek therapy, it sounds like it was heartbreaking to lose her. Also, comfort the kids, hold them, do fun things with them (amusement parks, movies), and mostly just BE there, be around for them, so that they have someone they can turn to. Good luck, and once again, I'm so sorry
2007-01-05 05:12:14 · answer #2 · answered by High On Life 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Are you in a state of panic becuase your spelling is absolutely terrible. However, I'd suggest contacting her lawyer and reading her will. Perhaps everything will be in there. Is there no father? If all else fails, find a nearby relative, possibly grandmother/grandfather etc.. who is willing to take care of them temporarily and you will need to arrange funeral services, possibly talk to the lawyer and get the distribution of things in the will. Then you must find a permenant caretaker for these children. It may be stated in the will but if not, contact child services or talk to someone who may help.
2007-01-05 05:05:00 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
who
2007-01-05 05:03:54 · answer #4 · answered by blahblahblah 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sorry for your loss.
2007-01-05 05:04:11 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋