my boyfriend is a t.b.i (tramatic brain injury) he got into a car accident, has been in a wheelchair for 3 years now......he said he wants too marry me, we had our share of problems but im so insecure i dont know why, everytime he says something sweet like "i love u" or "i wanna marry you" i get theses doubts that make me not believe him and im always thinking he will cheat on me what should i do break up with him because my biggest fear is he will leave me i love him so very much but the only thing from me believing n e thing he says is that fear,
2007-01-04 17:47:17 · 20 answers · asked by babygirl00087 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
hi there im sorry that youre b/f was involved in such a horrible accident that must have been a terrible time for all involved but with time and care and attention you have both came through that bit ......sweetheart you can only answer these questions do you really love him and want to be with him .....no matter what ......then the next thing that you need to do is sit down and talk to this man that you love so much .......what ever is going on in youre head .....can be sorted out and it will make youre relationship a lot stronger and it will move on ......i cant help but get the feeling that you have been really hurt and you are scared to go to the next level with this relationship .......give it a try what have you got to lose you could find out that it is the best thing on this planet for the both of you .....remember this ,this is youre life and all the decicions that you make are for you and you alone the people that we want in our lifes and the ones we do not want in our lifes .....if you really want him in youre life then let him in .....and the rest will sort its self out .....good luck and take care xx
2007-01-04 18:00:06 · answer #1 · answered by a parent hows been there !! 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Has he cheated on you before?? Then you got a reason to be afraid. If not the guy surely really does love you. You have been there for something that many people will never go through, and he knows how lucky he is that you stayed. Most people would have just given up, but you stayed around. I don't know what else to say but marriage is a big thing so just make sure you are doing what is right for you and him, Good Luck
2007-01-05 01:54:58 · answer #2 · answered by marion 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Has he given you cause to think he would cheat on you? If you have doubts that are founded on reality you should run, run like the wind. It seems you mentioned the tbi, but why did you mention it? Are you leery of marrying him because he is disabled, or do you feel guilty for leaving him because he is disabled? Maybe that is your fear. OR, maybe his injury makes you realize that life is fleeting, and you came so close to losing him once, maybe your just scared to lose him again, so you are protecting yourself by not taking a chance on love because your scared of losing. You need to realize that you are worthy of love, whether it is for a day, a year, or a lifetime, and you deserve to be treated well. If he is good to you, take a chance. You deserve to be happy no matter what you decide.
2007-01-05 01:59:18 · answer #3 · answered by sharons 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Start doing some serious soul searching and find out why you are insecure. Deal with your own insecurities or you will have a hard time being in a healthy relationship with anyone. Take your time. Live. Grow. Get to know yourself better. And never rush into anything out of fear of hurting someone, pleasing someone, or fear of loosing someone. Good luck.
2007-01-05 01:55:22 · answer #4 · answered by connorsmom916 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I don't think you should be insecure.. please don't break up with him, I don't know your situation but honestly you could be his whole world. If you've been taking care of him since the accident you're probably his rock, strength, etc. If you love him and want to be with him do it. He won't cheat on you most likely... you've been thru so much together. He's probably worried you'll cheat on him, if he's in a wheelchair (I'm not discriminating but I'm pretty sure these thoughts would have entered his mind, sadly). Don't give up on your relationship, sounds like you have something worth keeping.
2007-01-05 01:53:55 · answer #5 · answered by Principessa 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
U don't sound ready for marriage. Trust in ur partner is a huge part of marriage and if u are going to go around second guessing him all the time then u will never live a peaceful life in harmony. Counselling sounds like a good idea at this stage.
2007-01-05 01:52:11 · answer #6 · answered by Tequila Sheila SA 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Dont marry him becuase you pity him for the tbi !! if you love him and feel that you cannot live without him then go for him. Be cautious what may look like genuine love to you right now, may seem like sympathy feelings a few year later !
2007-01-05 01:54:49 · answer #7 · answered by Varun 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
He is in a wheelchair. Let's be blunt, no girl really imagines their dream wedding with some guy in a wheelchair.
If you love this guy, be with him and stop feeling insecure.
2007-01-05 01:52:41 · answer #8 · answered by ZCT 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
you cant have a relationship nor can you truly love someone if you always doubt them. So My advice would be to leave and don't settle for some other average man. Look for BIGGER and better if you know what i mean.
2007-01-05 01:52:26 · answer #9 · answered by americanstaffordshirexamericbull 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
dont marry yet
r u sure u can live with everything
problems occur when ppl expect too much from another
more problems will come later
dont rush into things
2007-01-05 01:48:58 · answer #10 · answered by Jay a 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋