How can I get guys to actually talk to me?

Question

I have problems with guys. They just won't talk to me. I'm already a pretty shy girl, so I'm obviously not just going to strike up a conversation with someone I'm not close friends with already. My friend has told me that a lot of the guys I'm into have told that they're really attracted to me. The thing is, that's all I get! None of them will ever even say "hey".
So I have three questions:

a. What the hell is their problem?

b. What the hell is my problem?

c. How do I solve these?

Answer 1

A. You can't solve their problems.

B. Are you engaging them? Making eye contact? being interesting and non-judgemental (within reason)? Are you interesting yourself (or a wallflower that does not engage?)

C. Be open, tolerant, and willing to share part of yourself that is not an act, facade, or deception.

Maybe you're just meeting guys in the wrong circumstances.

Answer 2

nissa......this is easy......since u know wht d problm is , half the job is done. they may not come forward as u also dont do the same and they may feel that u wudnt bother responding to them.so if u want tostrike a converstaion with a guy , jus take it easy n simply start it with a "hey" as u said.guys like talking about themselves and also u cud find a common tpic to startthe conversation . once u start then dont look back.dont faulter.dont jus shy away from that guy again .once u open up other guys wud also try to b ur frnd.as u mentioned u r a very attractive girl, it shudnt b muchof a problem. jus make a start.ur problm is that u keep telling urself ur shy and dont want to get out of that shell.their problem is that they feel u wont come out of ur shell.so thrs d problm. open up......d world is realy beautiful......it will help ulater in life as well.........communication is v important dear....lemme know how thngs worked out

Answer 3

A: Their problem is that you are not beign honest with them. you are not telling them how you feel so they are scared that you dont really like them. Its not their fault, they are just protecting themselves. Again, you got to realize they are juss like you they are nervous.

B: you have to ask yourself, why are you nervous when you talk to these boys. Maybe if you inititated convorsation first, they would talk to you. You dont have a problem. you are just like most other people on the world. You basically are scared of talking to these boys because you dont want to be rejected. like everyone else in this world, you want to fit in. You are protecting your self from mental anguish.

C: Take it step by step. AS i said if you initiate a convorsation, they will talk. Being a guy, i know that sometimes it is intimidating trying to talk to a hot chick, but if you are friendly, we are friendly back. Start oout by just saying hi and hello and gradulaly make you way up to "and how was ur weekend." this will stike a convo and a friendship. Who knows where that will lead. i think you guys will be more comfortable when you kno each others personalities.

Answer 4

If guys aren't talking to you it could be for 1 of 3 reasons: 1: they actually are not interested in you despite what your friend says..., 2. they are attracted to you and intimidated to come speak to you 3. they just have other things on their mind.

So don't wait for them to come talk to you...you go talk to them and see how it plays out.This way you'll know what the deal is and feel that much more confident for making a move. Even if you get shot down, at least you'll know that you tried. don't live with any regrets....

Answer 5

If you are shy you may be ignoring their advances so it's not their problem. You need to make yourself more available to talk to otherwise a guy will think you are stuck up or want nothing to do with him. I understand your being shy as I am too, but people who are not shy can not understand it and sometimes perceive it as something else. Find something that makes you comfortable in situations so you will open up more.

Answer 6

There's nothing wrong when taking the first move. So if u like to talk to them, just go and do it. Boys dont like to start a convo with a shy girl because they dont know what to say. So your role is to start it and have fun. Then guys will talk to u more.

(sorry english is not my first language =) )

Answer 7

They could be the shy ones, usually pretty girls don't get a lot of conversation. Lesser beautiful girls usually have a lot of convo because guys feel equal to them.

I say if there is a guy around, invite him to talk. Guys aren't assholes most of the time and like to talk to girls. Girls however... can be bitches and .. well thats another story.

Answer 8

well, being a guy, i know that guys are shy when it comes to talking with girls. so there's their problem. they are just as shy with you. i would find something they like and try to start a conversation on that. the biggest fear is taking the first step and that first step is hello. i would suggest to try to say hey and see where it leads.

Answer 9

umm well you have to have self confidence in youself i had the same problem and it was so hard yo talk to a boy but my friends introduced me to some of them and i hanged out with them and they talked to me so try to do that.their problem is they may be shy or 2 nervous to talk to you they think they will say something wrong.you dont really have a problem girls are like that at ages.just calm down member self confidence

Answer 10

you don't have any problem people personality change and adjust...be your self think that only you want to be friends with guys and don't think further than that once you are calm and natural in your relations (not tensed and shy) every thing will go right 4 you..be natural what you feel just let it out be what you really want...good luck.