I have one of the greatest guys alive. He loves me with everything and treats me like a queen. He helps with and LOVES my kids like they are his own. Why can't I just let my worries of our little problems go? I think I trying to sabatoge our relationship. I love him and have for many years. Even when we were apart I thought of him constantly. If you have ever been in this situation please help with your advice.
2007-01-04 16:06:45 · 3 answers · asked by Wicked Angel 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
I'm in a similar situation myself, except he's the one with the kid. But it's like sometimes i let the fact that he has a child with someone else (though i love the little rugrat) and other things bother me to the point where i almost think of just leaving him, though i know i couldn't live without him and wouldn't want to. And i don't know. For me, i guess it was because i thought my last guy was "The One" and built my future and all my dreams around him, and when it was over that all went too, so maybe i'm trying to keep my head out of the clouds this time so i don't have as hard to fall if i do again, which could be your situation too. But sometimes we try so hard to protect our hearts that we break them ourselves and hurt ourselves by trying too hard not to be hurt; kind of a catch-22. But, basically, i guess the best advice for both of us is to trust, but not blindly ; to expect the best, but prepare for the worst, just in case, just to feel that we're not suckers:P, you know? But real love is such a rare, beautiful thing to find these days, so it would be a shame for either of us to lose it. So just try to trust your heart and your man with it and i'll try to do the same with mine.
2007-01-04 16:44:04 · answer #1 · answered by Miss Understood 7 · 0⤊ 2⤋
There should be some underlying important issue/problem that remained unresolved between you and your lover. You might think/feel it insignificant or ignored it first but as long as it remined unresolved, it would be like a hidden bomb which will blow off one day, hurting or even destroying your relationship. Try to think and analyse carefully what your "little problems" really are, and why it still causes your attention and worry. You may try to write down what you really "value" in a relationship, his virtues as well his shortcomings. Then try to understand yourself as well as your needs, and realize what the utmost important priorities are in a relationship. Let him know about the issue/problem and what you really value in a relationship. Show your appreciation about his virtues and express your sincerity of resolving the issue/problem with him. If both of your are really in love, you will try to understand and work out the issue/problem with each other. If the problem/issue still remains unresolved even though both of you have worked hard at tackling it, you may need to find an expert or a relationship consultant. A good relationship takes lots of efforts/thoughfulness to maintain.
Good luck!
2007-01-04 16:44:19 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
maybe you think theres something that has to be wrong but there isn't so you just worry about stuff like that
2007-01-04 16:10:09 · answer #3 · answered by pandas 2 · 0⤊ 2⤋