ive been with my bf for 9 months and living together for 4 months and for the past two months it seems hes not as interested in sex or other positions or places and ive tried lots of things ive tried porn, different times of day, me initiating (alot), even sexy lingerie but all that does is sit on my dresser, and when i do get him to have sex he'll get off quick and im left turned on and frustrated. is it time to get a vibrator cause im running out of ideas.
2007-01-04 15:00:12 · 9 answers · asked by tasha1b4u2b_beth 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
wow, that sounds kinda scary to me. The only time that a guy isn't horny (assuming that he's still in his prime...like 20-40 yrs. old) is when he's getting the sex somewhere else. I don't mean to scare you, and it's possible that isn't true, but i would definitely suggest finding out about it. ask him straight-out, or keep an eye on him if you see anything suspicious.
if you find out that he isn't cheating, then that's great! One idea is to make yourself sometimes unavailable. A man always wants to chase after you...it's exciting to him. If he feels like you're there no matter what, then there's no intrigue left and he might just stop caring. Don't initiate sex in any way for a while, and when he eventually asks for it, tell him that you're not in the mood. Trust me, he'll get the message. I know it'll probably be difficult to say no if you want it, but it'll fix everything in the long run. Only tell him that you're in the mood the 2nd, or if you're a strong woman, the 3rd time he wants it. Then, you're his goal again, and the chase is back. Make yourself his treasure, not an object he can pick up any time.
good luck!
2007-01-04 15:08:19 · answer #1 · answered by julka323 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
First of all it seems like you guys are only going out because of the sex, your not fully attracted to each other emotionally. You guys need to start communicating or your relationship will suffer. You have to learn how to balance both that way your fulfulling both needs the physical and the emotinal on a even scale. That way its more real when you guys have sex because your both emotionally attracted and physically attracted to each other as well.
Good luck, kesha
2007-01-04 23:06:35 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sit him down and have a chat bout how your feeling but make sure its not while you are in bed or anything, say like over dinner would be better. If he cant make an effort for you then hes not worth it. He could be stressed out or tired tho so take that into consideration.
2007-01-04 23:04:42 · answer #3 · answered by Onie 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
it seems like your sort of pushing him on to have sex, and its not very good to be too pushy. For example, advertisments are always leading you on to do something like buy a product or go to the gym...whatever... or thoses people in the kiosks at the mall that are like "Hey if you by this product you will have the softist skin" Now, when you begin to realize that they are leading you into doing something that you may or may not do... it kinda becomes annoying and you almost push back on them and say "sry but i got to go" Sound familier? So instead of acting more of like and advertiser...change your postion to a customer and listen to what he has to say... And do things that he may want to do... It helps to put yourself in his postion and really just try to think what he thinks--about everything, about you... its a good extersize and... maybe you will find out something new
2007-01-04 23:16:20 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
He is one lucky guy & doesnt know it. I have no girlfriend only see nude women on the tv or in magazines. There are a lot of men out there who would love to have someone like you.
2007-01-04 23:05:32 · answer #5 · answered by myrtle1beach 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I dont' know how to put it lightly, but maybe he's not that into you.
You should read the book "He's just not that into you" by Greg Behrendt.
Its a really good book for women to decipher what men really want from you.
2007-01-04 23:08:44 · answer #6 · answered by ShareBear 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Has he not been interested in sex in the first place? Or was it a sudden change?
Can't force a person to be turned on... perhaps he's not in the mood...
Ask him...
2007-01-04 23:03:19 · answer #7 · answered by ? 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i agree with pokie's answer. ask him over a meal. if it is stress, try to help him out with some work the best way you can.get him relaxed before you think about having sex.
2007-01-04 23:10:53 · answer #8 · answered by bababa 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
get viagra that should get him pumping good
2007-01-04 23:09:33 · answer #9 · answered by net lover 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋