Does my father have to walk me down the aisle?

Question

My father and I have never been close. I want to walk myself down the aisle, but I was wondering if I would be looked down upon for this. I feel like since he hasn't really been there for me emotionally my entire life, I'd rather walk by myself. I would still have him give me away though.

Answer 1

its your wedding so do what you want to. most weddings now have some "traditional" things but a lot of them do not...but its your day so do what makes you happy. as someone else said walk by yourself or have a "fatherly" figure person walk you down or even your mother. I personally had both my parents walk me down the isle and played Butterfly Kisses rather than a wedding march b/c I'm such a daddy's little girl and I used to sing the song for him...but just be sure to have fun on your wedding day and pre-wedding jitters are not allowed. It will be a day that you always remember so just enjoy it!! GOOD LUCK!!!

Answer 2

I actually did this, I had a neighbor I knew do it.

And now I think I regret it. But it did make me feel easier and freer at my wedding day, and that is what was important at the time, I guess. Still, I did have kind of a funny feeling about it when the actual day came.

Then I found out my Dad put in the whole price of it! And I didn't know that when I arranged this.

Plus the neighbor ended up feeling alittle strange when my Dad showed up!

Well, I did get the freedom of having it the way I wanted it, plus the relief of it all.

Here is the part of it that I regretted. I think having my Dad would have actually given the marriage more stability.

Cause' I don't want to disillusion, I still believe in marriage! But I am divorced now, and my ex and my Dad remained friends for awhile.

And I think my Dad would have been much more ready to go to bat for me if he had walked down the aisle and given me away!

I know there is no changing a person's mind. But my ex did tell me that he regretted his dicission.

And we don't Alway's know the feelings of other people, like are Father's. There can be a very surprising amount of feeling that can come out through the years that we just didn't know was there.
It complicates it when people can say the most all things to each other, and not even realize cause they don't think what they say is important! I absolutely hate the stupidity of that, but it's just talking, to them, ya know? And they don't mean it but we don't know that!

Answer 3

if ur dad is not around, u can get another father-figure to walk u down, like an uncle or even your elder brother.
Why don't u just let ur dad walk u down the aisle, and try to make amends and re-new your relationship with him?
perhaps he's not good at expressing himself openly, but i think he loves you just the same, and would be really honoured and proud that his little girl is getting married and wants him to wlak her down the aisle.
Give it a try, and u'll not regret it whn he's no longer around.
Who knows, maybe your relationship with him will turn out for the better :)
Have a lovely wedding and a wonderful & long-lasting marriage! :)

Answer 4

You could either have your Mom walk you down the aisle, or even your Fiance's dad. I did that because my dad died before I got married. You can also walk yourself down the aisle and your fiance will meet you halfway and walk you down the rest of the way. Good luck.

Answer 5

It's your day, do what you want. I wouldn't think one way or the other when you walk down the aisle. When I see a bride walking down the aisle I'm checking out her gown. That is it, nothing else is important to me at that moment.

Answer 6

My uncle did not walk his youngest daughter down the aisle. He was walking with a cane at the time and was afraid of tripping on her gown's hem or tripping over the cane or just looking stupid. But when the pastor asked, "Who gives this woman," he stood up at the pew, helped her mother stand, and said, "Her mother and I do." Then they both sat down.

I thought it looked very nice, and it didn't cause a murmur in the guests, so I guess it's not that uncommon.

Answer 7

You don't have to have your father walk you down the aisle. You can have your mother or a fatherly figure to walk you down and give you away to your future husband.

Here is a website that has 8 styles that you can walk down the aisle:
http://www.weddingbasics.com/blog/article.asp?SUBJ=The+Wedding+Aisle+Who+Is+Walking+You+Down+It&Key=716

Congrats!!!

Answer 8

Laura,

Like holidays: Christmas, ThanksGiving, Valentines day, you are going to find a Wedding brings friends and family that carry a lot of baggage with them to the party. My wife & I are recenlty separated after 22 years of being together. This is my first Christmas on my own. I wanted to be alone and go pick up the kids for dinner. Thru $$therapy$$ (its on me tonight), I learned that because my feelings and want to "make a statement" may make me feel a certain way, my actions would have reprocussions on her, but alos my kids, both our parents and friends. WOW, thats not what I wanted when I thought I wanted to be by myself!!! So...I called my wife and we talked and decided for me to come early in the morning, share Christmas and dinner then I took the kids to a movie. I tell you that not for the sake of the story, but to let you see that action had a very POSITIVE REACTION on my kids, my wife, her parents and actually me. I am glad I did it! I subsequently took 2 days off and went to a hunting resort by myself later in the week.

Please, let your day be your day,, but share it with all you have there. It seems like a small thing to state your reason and I believe you have good reason, but since he will be there and you will let him give you away, go ahead and take that short walk that day. You have the REST of your married life to let your husband know & see by example so your daughter wan't feel that way toward him (change begins with your generation).

I wish you well and pray for you & your husbands marriage & PEACE in 2007!! The old cliche "Never go to bed mad" is so true. Be good to each other and remind him that money does not ever replace time with eachother ~ spend that as MuCH as you can!

Answer 9

How can he give you away if he doesn't walk you down the aisle? Does he just step out from his seat when you get to the altar?

Answer 10

..........Can I tactfully suggest that you rethink your plans?

Yeah, you can walk down the aisle alone. It's YOUR wedding....you can do whatever you want.....but you'll probably regret it in later life.

Maybe this will be the thing to bring you two together. (Maybe not.) But think about your reasons for NOT having him walk you down the aisle. Whatever you decide....I wish you the best and good luck with your wedding.

***