I feel helpless. My Aunt ( father's sister ) committed suicide 5 years ago. Depression runs thick in my blood. Now my father and mother split after 30 years. I am close to my dad. Although I feel he has lost his mind. It's only getting worse. We talk for long periods of time on the phone. I do my best to make him feel better, I try SO hard to help him. It just feels as though he is trapped in his own world. So sad, and he tries to listen to my kind words, although just can't. He told me today that he already feels dead, that he has NO self esteem. I said to please keep fighting. Cause I need to know that our family can make it, that we are strong. He answered... That us family are not fighters, that's just how it is. He feels he can't go on. Lately he has not said the words " I will kill myself." Although I know something is really wrong, and it isnt' getting any better. HELP??? I feel so helpess. I feel if my dad committs suicide, then it will poisen me forever.
2007-01-04 13:27:26 · 9 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
You are a good and caring daughter. There are several things you can try to do to help your dad. One would be to suggest that he make an appointment with his doctor to discuss his feelings of depression, and be professionally evaluated. You could offer to go with him, but he may not want you to. The previous post about talking with a pastor or someone in his community is a good one, too. Look up the number of a suicide prevention hotline that serves his area and give him the number. Make him promise that he will not do anything to harm himself until he calls that number. This is a very scary thing to go through and I feel for you. Good luck, and God bless! I will keep you and your dad in my prayers.
2007-01-04 13:37:49 · answer #1 · answered by meatpiemum 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
First of all, I am no doctor but I can tell you from personal experience that do not waive aside your father's comments about killing himself as light and just ranting. A thirty year marriage is a big chunk of his life and to have that just end is enough to have anyone question if it is worth going on or not. What your father needs right now is you and you listening to him without judgment. There is no right or wrong on how he is feeling. Tell him what you said about being poisoned forever if he killed himself. Convince him that you are truly there for him and that you need him in your life. What he really wants right now is someone to make him feel like his life is worthy in this world. Divorce is like a death in a way. A relationship that he put his life into has ended and left him empty. Dont kow the details and it is not my place to ask, but just know that your dad will go through the same steps from his divorce as he would if someone died. Just be with him, talk to him everyday, let him know you are here for him in this trying time. I think he will come out of it, but you have to let him mourn his loss. I hope this helped a little.
2007-01-04 21:38:41 · answer #2 · answered by PKG 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I lost My First love to suicide. He was all kinds of depressed but never spoke the words " I wish I was dead" or " I am going to kill myself so I just overlooked alot. Sadly I lost the best thing that ever happened to me. I seriously urge you to seek help for your dad. Depression is not something to overlook honey. I know the pain and regret I live with for not realizing sooner that PJ needed help. Do you have someone like a clergy member or another family member you ask to help you talk to your father. If not there should a mental facility that you can call and maybe they would have some ideas. My love and prayers are with you and your dad.
2007-01-04 21:42:09 · answer #3 · answered by daddies_lil_angel62702 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Depression is not willpower. It's an imbalance of chemicals in the brain, usually a shortage of seratonin or norepinephrine. Get him evaluated for it. If he had diabetes you'd insist he takes insulin, you wouldn't tell him to order his pancreas back to work. He can't order his brain to behave any better than that. Follow it up with therapy which will teach him new ways of thinking about things, so he won't fall into the patterns that got him depressed in the first place.
A key symptom of depression is an inability to make decisions so get your mother and everyone else to work on getting him evaluated.
A danger sign of immenent suicide is if he very suddenly seems cheerful with no appearent cause. It usually means the decision has been made to kill himself.
Don't put things off, he will not get help easily.
2007-01-04 22:30:55 · answer #4 · answered by nursesr4evr 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You may need to do more than just talk on the phone. Get your Dad some help. Spend some quality time with him. As you know it is nobody's fault to have depression. But, there is so much help out there. My sister just committed suicide in September. We talked every day on the phone. I didnt have a clue that she would really go through with what she did. Spend time with him. Get him some professional help. Time heals all wounds. If he commits suicide it is no ones fault. Not his and not yours. But you can help him get some help.
2007-01-04 21:36:48 · answer #5 · answered by HDGranny 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
There are counselors...individual and family. Call them. Don't try to do something a professional should be doing. It is going to bring you down....... Everyday work on what is going on in 'your' life. You cannot save your Dad. You can lend him your support, but do not drown in it. As far as the suicidal issue. It may or not be a serious thought. Many times people make those type of statements in bad times in their lives. Sometimes people have it sneak up on them and don't realize they are suicidal. However, call someone professional
2007-01-04 21:49:32 · answer #6 · answered by Blue-rose 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Depression is one of the key signs. Not all people will tell you that they are going to commit suicide. Trust your instincts and try to get your dad some help. Try talking with your pastor or someone at suicide prevention. Don't wait until he says it....
2007-01-04 21:33:21 · answer #7 · answered by Robin H 2 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Call 1-800-SUICIDE. you can just talk to them to vent if you want. hang in there & stay strong. i know it's hard but you've got to try. and make sure to tell your dad how he is affecting you and how him being this way is making things really tough on you. the key is not to make him feel bad but to hopefully open his eyes to the world around him. but i'm no expert...so i say try calling the hot line. it's not just for people themselves that are suicidal but friends & relatives of people who are or might be.
peace.
2007-01-04 22:32:09 · answer #8 · answered by smile 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
omg thats relle sad just go to his house and show him some pictures of when you were younger with him and all the fun times and so some activities you two used to do or just get to tickets to go on vacation the two of you to make him cheer up and constantly tell him how much you love him
2007-01-04 21:35:11 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋