My mom abandoned me and i feel like i am about to give up?

Question

Im 15. 5 mos ago my mom left to take care of my papaw who was sick in Texas. I live in kentucky. Well my mother has never been that great; abusing me, my 14 yr old sis and my 22 yr old sis. not just physically but mentally. when she left i actually liked not worrying about her getting mad at me but i took on all parental responsibilities. she is in texas at a friends house smoking pot and god knows what else while her kids are suffering. she wont listen if i ask her to come home and my stepdad wont tell her to come home. my stepdad is also a problem. he only cares about himself and makes us clean and cook while he stays on his butt. i have cried so much because my stepdad said it was my fault she left. i have even felt like killing myself. my older sister almost kiled herself a few yrs ago because my mom was so mean to her. i have to my the parent in the household and worry about keeping my 4.0 in school. i am a good daughter i think. why do i deserve this? what to i do? Thanks

Answer 1

:(... i'm sorry u had to go thru so much... of course u don't Deserve this.. no one really "deserves" negative things.... however, life is not fair, and it happens, to all of us, in different ways. waht u need to do is find the strength to continue on as best u can, No Matter What u go thru in past, present or future.

do u have any other family to help you? perhaps u can relocate and move to a family member in another state? or u can maybe move out w/ ur sisters, and try to make it that way? maybe u and ur younger sis can get side jobs, and help ur older sister to pay for bills? or u can even apply to the state and say that ur parents are unfit?

good luck.... no matter what, u are a wonderful person to care about ur family so much. no u dont' deserve it, but just remember that u can get thru it, as long as u keep trying. don't give up... work hard so u can help ur younger sister have a better life.. it's worth it :). and later on, u will be a stronger person because of all this. i suggest maybe going to a church or some type of organization (boys and girls club, etc), maybe they can help collect donations, or find some people to semi-adopt u guys, or u can volunteer ur time to help others so u don't have to be home as often..??

take care always , and keep doing ur best. it is all anyone can ask of u~

Answer 2

This isn't happening to you because you did something or deserve it in some way. This is happening because your mom and dad are making crappy choices. At least you see the situation for what it is and can articulate yourself so well. First, don't kill yourself, it's not worth it. There are so many great things to do in the world and since you only get one life, I don't think you should waste it. What you've got to do is stick with school, and maybe use college as a way to leave your situation. Have goals, make plans. Go live an adventure. think of all of this as a blessing. Things happen for a reason. Maybe if things had always been ok you wouldn't have worked as hard at school and you wouldn't have had that 4.0 that's going to get you into a great school. Thank your parents for being a great example of how to be shitty adults, now you know how not to act. You seem pretty smart. Think about the situation, what do you want to do, where do you want to go. then Make it Happen!!! If you need anymore advice or someone to talk to get in touch with me. Remember you are the architect of your own design. You write your life story. Struggle is what builds character. You have knowledge about things kids your own age have no idea about, that gives you a head start in the world. Good Luck

Answer 3

Are there any other relatives you all can live with? Where is your 22 year old sister? I knew someone that was going through a similar situation who where brother and sister. When the sister graduated from high school, she got a job and took her brother who at the time was 13 with her and she took care of him until he graduated and went to college. If you do not have any other family members to go to or no other resources are in your area, the counselors can't help you try talking to your 22 year old sister about getting her own place and you all move in. She can probably get help from social services for food. During the summer, you can work a summer job to help her out. Whatever you do, try to get help for your situation (you and 14 year old sister) because you have expressed thoughts of suicide. And no it is not your fault your mother left. She is a grown woman and she made a decision to leave. It is probably your stepdad's fault why she left. He is just trying to find someone else to blame.

Answer 4

I'm sorry to hear about your situation. Please understand that it's NOT your fault that your mom left you. Don't try to kill yourself either-this storm will be over and then you can live a better life. I think you need to have a talk with your step dad and tell him that it is NOT your fault that your mom left you and that you are working as hard as you can by doing a lot with the house but you have grades in school to worry about too and would appreciate it if he could help out a little bit too. Say it nicely though-no matter how hard you wanna say it in a loud tone. Don't let ANYBODY try and say crap to you. You do NOT deserve people saying mess and making you do everything when you've got other things in life that you need to do.
If you want, see if you and your sister can move in with your older sister-that is, if she has enough money and room to support the two of you guys. If not, move in with a different family member-like an aunt, uncle, grandparent, older cousin, etc.
Don't give up yet...the race is almost over and you've been so brave and strong so far. Keep trying to stay positive and hold your head up, girl!
I wish you all the best!

Answer 5

You are 15 yrs old and as far as I can see you have been through a lot. Keep making good grades because one day it will pay off. Your mother has some severe addictions at this point and that is her first love. Her mind may not be as stable due to drugs etc. She is not herself right now. If she would of never touched a drug then maybe her actions would be different. I'm sure somewhere in her heart she still loves you but she has no control of herself. But it will be up to her to better herself before she destroys herself. There are other steps to take. If you feel that matters is getting out of hand then talk to your school councilor or call the abuse hot line for help. But never decide to take your life because God has a life for you after you have survived through this Hell that you are going through. This situation can make you or break you but it is up to you to decide. This is a time when you need God in your life so pray everyday. Be strong because one day you can walk out of that door and never look back! Remember to be strong.

Answer 6

well it's not your fault your mother and step father is a waste of space on this earth. But at 15 you are not responsible to try to take over and be the parent either, go to your school conselor tell them everything that has been going on If they are good conselors they will contact child and protective services and get you all the help that you need. The most important thing to remember is that none of this is your fault, and if your dead beat parents are not willing to do the right thing then you take the inetitive to do whats right. And good luck

Answer 7

Where is your 22 year old sis? Why don't you take your little sister and find your other relation (like an Aunt or Grandmother or someone who can take care of all of you kids) Talk to your counselor at school. It is absolutely not your fault that she left. If I were you I would talk to the counselor at school.

Answer 8

I am sorry to read about your story. It is not your fault that your mother left you. Your stepfather is probably upset and trying to blame you and your sister. Talk to your school counselor about your situation in hopes of helping you seek help from other resources. There is help for you and your sisters for you all do not have to live in this type of environment. If you do not want to talk to your school counselor, then talk to someone who does counseling. This can be beneficial to you. I also encourage you to get your sisters into counseling as well. Stay in school, keep your grades up so that you can be a successful in the future.

Answer 9

i am SO sorry. my best friend had that problem and all i told her to do was to get some help. your a great kid and you don't deserve to be treated that way. call someone. or stay at a friends house. tell your sisters to do the same. trust me. if you don't do the same, ...lets just say my best friend isn't who she's supposed to be.

Answer 10

awaken in the previous your mom and conceal her workstation. watch for her the place she sits while on her workstation and say "we ought to communicate". tell her which you cant take being abandoned anymore. Say it! "i can not take being abandoned." she will have the skill to ordinarily probably neither ask what you're speaking approximately or be indignant, and if she seems away tell "seem at me". Ask her a query, any question you like, it somewhat is something like "do you even care approximately me," or "do you like me," or "do you like me to go away." something. the 1st element that includes ideas. remember you should cry somewhat yet do no longer seem down, in no way seem down, seem her right now interior the attention and tell her the style you experience. you should combat yet do no longer permit her walk away. try your ultimate to no longer yell yet do no longer act aggravated the two. you're no longer attempting to place her down, you only desire her to appreciate.