An Englishman, a Scotsman, and an Irishman are all to give speaches to the Deaf Society. All are keen to make an impression on their audience.
The Englishman goes first and to the surprise of his colleagues starts by rubbing first his chest and then his groin. When he finishes the Scotsman and Irishman ask him what he was doing.
"Well," he explained "by rubbing my chest I indicated breasts and thus ladies, and by rubbing my groin I indicated balls, and thus gentlemen. So my speech started 'Ladies and Gentlemen'."
On his way up to the podium the Scotsman thought to himself I'll go one better than that English ba---rd and started his speech by making an antler symbol with his fingers above his head before also rubbing his chest and his groin.
When he finished his colleagues asked what he was doing. "Well," he explained "by imitating antlers and then rubbing my chest and groin I was starting my speech by saying 'Dear Ladies and Gentlemen'".
2007-01-04 08:30:32 · 30 answers · asked by Anonymous in Entertainment & Music ➔ Jokes & Riddles
On his way up to the podium the Irishman thought to himself I'll go one further than those mainland ba---rds and started his speech by making an antler symbol above his head, rubbing his chest, and then his groin, and then masturbating furiously.
When he finished his colleagues asked him what he was doing. "Well," he explained, "by imitating antlers, rubbing my chest and then my groin and then masturbating I was starting my speech by saying, 'Dear Ladies and Gentlemen, it gives me great pleasure'......."
2007-01-04 08:31:12 · update #1
hehehe that's a corker, thanks!
2007-01-04 08:34:09 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Lol, another one to add to the proverbial classic list!
Neesa, the "mainland b*****ds" part is refering to Ireland being physically separated, by sea, from England and Scotland whereas England and Scotland are only separate by a border. Indeed they are all different countries.
Eric H, an Englishman, an Irishman and a Scotsman is a popular form of joke in the United Kingdom. Its usual, in this scenario, for the Irishman to be the butt of the joke. Other countries have their own variations.
2007-01-05 04:35:58 · answer #2 · answered by Maxell Livett 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Extremely funny, keep up the jokes. Out of curiosity, why did u pick those three nationalities?
2007-01-04 08:37:14 · answer #3 · answered by Eric H 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yes. that was funny. Better than the previous one about the American having sex. That wasn't believable.
2007-01-04 08:33:35 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Thats a good one
2007-01-04 09:02:33 · answer #5 · answered by rickle91 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Funny joke!
2007-01-04 08:35:46 · answer #6 · answered by Nancy M. 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I don't understand the "mainland b*****ds" part. Do you mean that you think Ireland, England and Scotland are all the same country? They're three different countries.
2007-01-04 08:35:55 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 3⤋
not bad,, two Essex girls locked themselves out of their car, Mandy says, i cant get the frigging key in, Tracy says urry up mand its starting to rain and the blimmin roofs down,,,,,,,,,, now thats a bad one,,,,,,,,,,,,
2007-01-04 08:40:49 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
well done again 9/10
2007-01-04 08:51:35 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
as always you made me pmsl 10/10
2007-01-04 20:04:28 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yes i like it.
2007-01-04 08:37:47 · answer #11 · answered by taxed till i die,and then some. 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋