My BF's kids ages 9 and 12 are trtying to run my kids and I out of the house by being rude, sloppy disrespectful, mean to MY kids and the list goes on....My BF doesn't see it..he thinks this is normal. It's been going on for 6 weeks. I don't know what to do. I love him, but my kids are unhappy and I have to think of them. Help!
2007-01-04 06:25:57 · 9 answers · asked by computergrl69 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
I think that it's a perfectly normal reaction for kids to do thinkgs like that. Had it been the other way around and they had all moved in with you and your kids your kids may have been behaving that way. Give the kids time and they'll come around. Also, try talking to your BF about it again.
2007-01-04 06:32:24 · answer #1 · answered by Ashleigh 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
That age 9-12 is an awkward age. It might have been better if you 2 had gotten married and made the arrangement a bit more permanent. As it is you have the freedom to walk out of their lives just like their real mother did.. no wonder they aren't getting along with any of you. Major resentment and bad vibes in that house and if your BF don't see it then do you really want to live with a guy that can't notice rude behavior?
2007-01-04 06:32:17 · answer #2 · answered by Tapestry6 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Tough it out - if you leave you will only show his kids they can get what they want by being bullies. When you see bad behavior call them out on it and put a stop to it. Don't be pushed around. Give your bf specific examples and instances and explain to him that his kids are really making your kids unhappy by all the bullying. Be nice to his kids, try to love them like a parent and see how things work out. If things don't get better within a couple months then you need to have a serious talk with your bf and tell him if he doesn't do something about his kids then you will have to move.
2007-01-04 06:29:38 · answer #3 · answered by Rawrrrr 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Have you ever watched the movie Yours, Mine and Ours with Dennis Quaid and Rene Russo?
The problem you are having is very similar to this movie, but this one had a happy ending after all the problems were over and the kids started to understand and like each other. Why don't you rent it, sit down w/ the whole family and after it finishes just talk it over. You will be surprised of what you can accomplish if everyone involved shares their thoughts on the matter and speaks of his/hers feeling about the situation. I wish you the best in your life and your situation, and since you have your heart in the right place, since you are seeking for help, I am sure you will get this issue resolved, Love conquers all. Where ever there's Love, there is the divine power, and where ever the divine power is, there is nothing missing.
Cheers !!!
2007-01-04 06:38:54 · answer #4 · answered by Suntoosoon 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
you need to put an end to this situation before it gets worse. dealing with kids 9 and 12 is hard without the matters like urs.
you need to stand up for yourself and your kids. if your bf refuses to see it, then let him know you will be moving out permanently. you cannot keep moving in and out with your kids. they need stability. so if he decides that you are paranoid , show him up. leave.
you need respect even if they are only step kids. my bf has a 5 yr old who has fully accepted me and she loves my 4 mth old son so much she's always giving me all her money and toys for him.
its all in how you train your kids. she knows that we both love her, her dad and i and her mother even bought my son a christmas gift. This from a woman who until a few months ago did not even want her daughter within 100 ft of me even though my fiance and i are together 2 yrs 1 mth now.
2007-01-04 06:33:52 · answer #5 · answered by stacy 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
How old are his kids? You have to understand that you are intruding into their home so his kids might feel defensive toward their stuff...I think if you really love him you should stay but maybe move into a new place for everyone, not a place where you feel that this is mine and you are a guest.
2007-01-04 06:28:22 · answer #6 · answered by I MISS YOU! 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
New bf time
but it is up to you
get your act together and set rules bf & kids or be a whoose
I don't see respect .
2007-01-04 06:36:30 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Maybe your moving to fast for them to ajust
2007-01-04 06:27:45 · answer #8 · answered by Crystal Blue 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
not much u can say..u are in THEIR house..eating THEIR food...using THEIR electricity and gas..so...
2007-01-04 06:28:39 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋