without the usual cliche, eg 'im not looking for anything right now'. Shall i just be honest and say i just dont fancy you. Im just avoiding calls and texts at the moment which i know is the cowards way out. I also hate the idea of just sending a text or leaving a message on his voicemail. i have only met him twice and he just doesnt do it for me. Will he eventually get the message if i keep on avoiding him or shall i just be honest with him and tell him im not interested.
2007-01-04 05:56:06 · 52 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
Just let him know....avoiding someone is sooo sophomoric. Just look at it this way: if you met a guy and you thought he was cute and you were interested in him and you called him a number of times a day and he didn't answer YOUR calls, wouldn't that drive you mad??? Just let the poor bastard know that you aren't interested and save yourself all that time spent hitting the ignore button on your cell phone. It amazes me how much we fight to be adults when we're younger, but as soon as we are, we act like kids.....interesting, huh? Let that marinate and think about what I said. GOOD LUCK!
2007-01-04 06:02:11 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 3⤊ 0⤋
Tell him how you feel. I have not much of a clue on exactly what you are talking about to be honest but say instead of saying "im not looking for anything right now" say something like "I'm not looking for anything right now, sorry" and maybe give him a hug =)
Normally If I have a girlfriend that I take her somewhere quiet and tell her "Its not working out but any chance we could be friends" if you two had like a great time you could say "You have been amasing but I feel like I need more time with the relationship stuff and I want to be friends with you" something like that but saying "Your dumped" or "Your not my type" would be like shoving a dagger in his heart and make him cry.
Telling someone your not interested is quite difficult and I had the same cituation but I never avoid someone because its going to make things worse and its going to be alot harder to let it out from your system. And never ever leave a text or message because its meaningless, more hurtful (I have been dumped by text alot of times and I felt really upset than being told in person) and worst of all you never know what they are gonna do next.
See if this works and find out if this answer solves your problems. Good luck and dont hold back.
2007-01-04 07:01:06 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
You gotta tell him you're not interested, it's not only the mature thing to do, it's the right thing to do. As someone earlier pointed out, just think about how you would feel if you were in his position, you wouldn't want to be strung along either. Tell him that you're flattered that he's interested in you but unfortunately you're not interested. Tell him that you don't want to see him get hurt and that you thought it was only fair that you tell him now rather than later.
Yeah, you run the risk of hurting the poor guy's feelings by telling him you're not interested but just think how much worse he'll feel if you just ignore him. If the guy gets angry or really whiny then you will know right away that you were right not to be interested in the first place. But if he handles it maturely you might actually still be able to be friends.
In the future, you can avoid all of this by just telling the guy when he asks that you aren't interested. It's not mean to gently tell a guy you're not interested - it's actually worse to let him think that you are when you're not.
2007-01-04 06:23:19 · answer #3 · answered by Wine From Your Tears 2 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Be honest... say u had a good time on ur previous 2 dates, but the chemistry is just not there, and that it's not gonna work! Avoidance techniques don't always work, and can end up comin back 2 bite u in the butt... e.g if u bump into him @ the supermarket... think about it!
2007-01-04 06:07:30 · answer #4 · answered by Cheeky 2 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Avoidance is just rude, and there's no need for it. It's much kinder, and he will respect you more, if you can say something along the lines of "I'm sorry, you're a nice guy, and I don't want to mess you around, so I'm going to have to be honest - I'm not interested in you in that way".
2007-01-04 06:03:20 · answer #5 · answered by Anna 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
tell him but some guys don't take rejection well, I rejected someone after a 1st date because he was just the complete opposite to what turns me on. He decided I was the slag of the earth and ranted on about how I had no right to reject him!! We didn't even kiss on the date!!! but goes to show I did the right thing in the end. Just tell him you like someone else and want to pursue a relationship with the other guy. If he gets weird just say bye and leave it at that.
2007-01-04 06:01:23 · answer #6 · answered by Smoochy Poochy 6 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Be honest and tell him face to face if possible, or over the phone if not, that you are not interested. Just avoiding him is cruel and will just confuse the situation, honesty is the best policy.
2007-01-04 05:59:34 · answer #7 · answered by kittycymraeg 3 · 3⤊ 0⤋
life is a worn out cliche sometimes.
if u don't want to hurt him but require an oscar in the
process it will require some thought.
perhaps u should say he is just not ur type
and go on to enlighten him as to what sort of fellas
i.e. the exact opposite of him that u go 4
good day.
2007-01-04 06:00:47 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
dont avoid him or act nasty...
either tell him you dont like him or say your interested in someone else.. saying your interested in someone else (could pretend its your ex) makes it seem your not over the ex and this new guy doesnt have a chance.. that means he will respect your decision that you like someone else and leave you alone.
avoiding makes it worse trust me.. you get a stalker situation and this leads to trouble.
so mention some other guy to put him off.. or just say your not interested but say hes a nice guy..
you have to be alittle mean coz being mean coz that makes them go off you faster.
but dont be like..
oh F off, i dont like you coz ur ugly or coz ur boring. stop stalking me. thats not the way to go. unless it was REAL serious.
but i prefer the 'i like someone already' excuse best, gd luck!
PS: its better to do it sooner rather than later, dont want him gettin too attatched.. more attatched the more upset he will be.
2007-01-04 09:15:17 · answer #9 · answered by CoolD 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
they usually get the idea if you stop answering. But you could also just flat out tell him you are not interested in him. Be honest. That's life.
2007-01-04 05:58:55 · answer #10 · answered by sweetsourchikin 3 · 3⤊ 0⤋