How to cope with stress?

Question

I am extremely stresses out. My Grandma has dimentia and she has ran out of the house a couple of times. I dont know how to deal with the stress or where to get help. I live in Walnut Creek and she lives in San Francisco. I cant be spending every night with her, I even want to postpone my wedding which is in May because I just have to much stress. I need advice.

Answer 1

Pray

Answer 2

I tell ya what. I have dealt with dimentia with both my parents and my grandparents. Stress?? YOU BET!!! However if you think you have to always correct what grandma says-----DONT!! Go with the flow no matter how weird it may sound or seem. The worst thing you can do is argue with someone that can only remember things from the past --like their childhood. You argue with them or try to correct them it confuses them even more and continues to add STRESS for you. Take sevearl deep breaths ----walk into another room in the house and come back as though NOTHING has happened. YOU WILL BE SURPRISED how going to another part of the house for just 2 minutes will make a big difference. It does work. You will learn to have patience like you thought you would never have. It is NOT EASY, I know first hand, how hard it is. You will be fine. If you have other family members that can share in helping care for her then ALL of you need to pitch in and take turns in doing so.

Answer 3

Postponing your own life plans will create a resentment your fiance may take out on you.

Therefore, it's important to find out if anyone else in your family is going to share in the responsibility of taking care of her.

Stress is a way of telling you that you need the support and the help. Take a pill and you may feel fine, but the needs of your future husband will be put on the back burner. That's really not cool either.

So, communication is the key. If you have family members who argue with you about who should do what for grandma, you have to put your foot down and make your bounderies clear so that you can move on.

You can be happy and still love your grandmother. Just don't feel guilty. Guilt is the poison that grows like weeds in your garden of truth and harmony. No guilt, okay? Communicate!

LLJames

Answer 4

My grandmother also had dementia, but she never ran out of the home. You need more caretakers. You can not be soley responsible for her - that is to much. If you do not have more family that lives nearby, hire someone to stay with her during the day - but be cautious, they may steal. You will want a caregiver you know or someone from church who your trust.

As to dealing with your stress, get out! Exercise. Run. Running will make you feel better and will burn off some of the stressful energy you are feeling. Take baths with soothing candles. Try stretches, they may help. I'm sorry for your stress, I hope that this helps.

Answer 5

You need to enlist some other family members to lessen your burden. Insist on it.
Also, your grandmother is going to get to the point where she requires full time care, so those arrangements need to begin being considered.
Since you know whats causing your stress, you haven't really got a serious problem, or at least not one that you can't alleviate.
Once you and your family have made arrangements to provide care for your grandmother, you'll feel great relief. (This is something that is not your sole responsbility to do- don't think it is) If you don't know how you will care for her, talk to a doctor or health dept. official, or some person knowledgeable in caring for the elderly to find out what options mnay be available to you.
And yeah as suggested further down, alprazolam (xanax) can relieve stress temporarily. You don't really need it though-

Answer 6

The most important step that we can take to reduce stress is to recognize that the way we are choosing to view the situation is what is causing the stress, not the situation itself. Thing happen, it's how we learn to accept these thing and make the best of them that elevates the stress we feel/create. This is a difficult concept to let go of. It is a great comfort to see the cause of our discomfort as being externally generated. It removes all responsibility from us. Strips us of all of our power and leaves us a hapless victim. What nonsense. love and blessings Don

Answer 7

Well I would suggest that you tell your family members that you can't deal with your grandmother on your own and that you need help. Also to deal with the stress you could just find something that you truly love doing, and do it daily to relieve some of your stress. Just tell someone that you have too much to deal with right now, and you can't do it on your own,so tell a sibling if you have one.

Answer 8

If you have trouble coping with stress then you may need to seek medical attention.

There are quite a few stress relieving drugs available (valium, ie) that do quite well at handling short term stress syndrome.

Answer 9

Bless Your Heart. It is time to think of yourself. There are other ways Grandma can be taken care of. Life is Life we all get old. The best thing for you to do is start looking for a really nice Home for her, and Visit Everyday.

Answer 10

XANAX,seriously stress in moderation ,our minds and bodies are designed for. Stress in abundance can have devastating effects.
Go see your doctor,STRESS KILLS. There are hundreds of phyicial and emotional lasting effects, you can incur from to much stress. It may sound over extreme,but if you are suffering to much stress over an extended amount of time, invest in an office call.

Answer 11

If the stress is so great that it is freaking you out then you might consider seeing a therapist to help you learn how to deal with your stressors.