any suggestions on how to get my 2 year old to go to bed before 10 p.m. or later?

Question

should I get in the bed with him or should I make him get in bed at 8:30 and make him stay whether he cries or not? please help!!

Answer 1

Neither - but it sounds like the biggest thing your missing is a routine. Although (especially at 2), they are continually testing limits, toddlers really need routines that they can depend on to know what's going on. Just like with turning off the TV in the middle of their favorite program, if you just ship the kid off to bed without warning, of course he will freak out. A solid routine will give him the hint that bedtime is coming up and will help him ease his way there. It will take a few days of doing the same thing in the same order, but it will work.

First, figure out when you want him to go to sleep - let's say 8 PM. Then figure out how long your routine will take - probably about 1/2 hour. So, at 7:15 advise your child that you both will be going upstairs (or whatever is first in your routine, as long as you don't mention "going to bed"). Then at 7:30, take him to his room and start the routine. You may want to give a little wiggle room (our routine lasts anywhere from 1/2 hour to 45 minutes depending on how much our 2 1/2 year old stalls - potty, drink of water, putting her babies to bed, etc.). Do the routine, then leave. If he starts crying, wait 15 minutes, then go back in, tell him it is time to go to sleep and that everything is okay - but DON'T pick him up (you can rub his back or pat his head, but just be aware that you will be setting yourself up to having to do this every time, as he will expect it). Then leave again. Do the "waiting for 15 minutes" thing until he falls asleep. It's the worst for the first 3 - 4 days (and seems to be worse just before it gets better). We have had the same routine with my daughter (with some variations as she got older) since she was 3 months old and she rarely gives us a problem going to bed.

For a routine, think of calming things - for example, our routine is getting in her PJ's, putting her babies to bed, reading a book, going potty, brushing her teeth, turning her lights off and then jumping into bed where we sing a song before tucking her in. Some people like to give their children a bath each night as part of the routine too. Think about what works for you and him, and try it for at least 3 days. After that, you may need to tweak some things to get in the groove (and then try again for 3 more days). It takes a lot of patience, but is SO well worth the effort in the end!!! Good luck!

Answer 2

well, first thing - your 2-year-old can't tell time. so are you putting him to bed when he's tired and cranky, or when you're just worn out? many times, if a child seems hyperactive, and you think, "man, this kid would totally not fall asleep", it's because he's overtired. try the other suggestions, setting a bedtime routine, and start early, like 7pm.

i've heard suggestions like making a photo to-do checklist for bedtime. have pics of him brushing his teeth, taking a bath, putting on jammies, looking at books - that way he knows what's next. kids love routine!

let him know that this is quiet time, and then when it's time for bed. if he cries or gets out of bed, simply go to him and tell him again it's time for bed. this may go on for a long time, but it's worth it in the end. the only thing more stress-inducing than a cranky child is a cranky mama.

good luck, and i hope this advice works when i need to use it!

Answer 3

I had to give my girl a bath let her play for a bit and give her warnings that she has to go to bed in 10 minutes and then tell her gain 5 minutes later and just to make sure she was warned ahead of time of what was coming, then I would put her to bed read her a story tuck her in and leave the room even when she was crying, it took awhile for her to figure that bed time means bedtime you just have to stick to it and not give into the crying, if you give in once you just have to start all over again, you give in one and they will figure out crying for a certain amount of time they will eventually get their way, so tough it out it all works out in the end, my daughter is 3 now and when i start giving her the warnings just before bed she starts wrapping things up and knows it's bedtime soon, she still negotiates with me after reading a story but the temper tantrums stopped and she just stays in bed instead of jumping up screaming. Good luck.

Answer 4

My suggestion is this. Make up your mind you want him to bed at 8pm. If you not sure or you make anything else more important it won't work. Sometimes if you put your child to bed at a certain time and they fight you it's actually to late not too early. When you put them to bed too late they will fight you because they are actually already over tired and when they get over tired everything is a reason to fight. So what you need to do is start 30min. Earlier. Sometimes though if you have already been fighting about it everynight for a while they will fight than too becaue they are used to fighting you about it. (They learn pretty quicky what is a good reason to fight and what they have a chance a winning at) So i would start at 8pm. Make them lay down and don't give in. Go in every min or so and make them lay down again. Don't go outside of ear shot. Stay near and leave the room open. So you can walk by with out them hearing you... Walk up look in and lay them down again if you see them up again or if they are yelling and getting up. (If they are laying down and yelling just ignore them) By leaving the door open you are giving your self the opritunity to look in with out waking them up if they are doing the right thing. Because some kids will know the door sound and wake up again. (you don't want to be the cause of them being punished) Also sometimes the normal sounds of living will actually help them sleep. (you talking or doing dishes or watching tv quietly) Good luck

Answer 5

Take the TV out her room for starters, and any other possible distractions. Tell her how tired she'll be the next day if she doesn't sleep for mummy. Read her a relaxing story, with just the night light on, then tuck her in and give her a kiss, then turn off the lights. Say playtime is for day only, night time is for sleeping, not playing. If you have to, take the toys out her room, she'll soon get the idea. it's important she goes to sleep, she's so young.

Answer 6

You may want to take a couple nights and go to bed early yourself (not with him necessarily). One of the troubles we have with my oldest son is that he seems to not want to miss anything, so if anyone else in the house is up, he wants to be up, which is trouble because my wife is a night owl. If everything in the house shuts down (tv, etc.) and he sees that everyone is going to bed, maybe he won't fight it so much. - - - Might give you some time to catch some extra sleep or lay in bed and read a good book too!

Getting on a routine is key - getting up and going down near the same time each night, brushing teeth and reading book before bed, etc.

Answer 7

If he's still in a crib put him down at whatever time you see fit and turn out the lights and leave the room....close the door behind you and keep the house fairly quiet. If he thinks everyone else is asleep, he'll go to sleep too. Keep the routine consistant.

Answer 8

I have a 2 year old also. She usually goes to bed around 9:30. The best way is to make a routine and stick to it. we usually do dinner, then bath, then watch TV and play a little, then I let her know she has 5 more mins and then its time for bed.

I used to try to get in bed with her and let her fall asleep before i left....bad idea!! it sure didnt work for us! We put her in her room with the door open, but put a saftey gate across her doorway so she cant get out. At first she cried, but eventually got in her bed and went to sleep. In less than a week the crying stopped completely and now she walks herself into her room, gets right into bed, and goes to sleep! Last night she even told me she wanted to go to bed!

If you want him to go at 8:30 then make sure he takes short nap around noon and tell him through out the day or at least a few hours before bed thathe is going to sleep in his own bed like a big boy. put him to bed at 8:30 and let him cry it out. Just remember, once you start something like this you have to stick to your guns! Dont give in!!! It is going to be so hard, but it will work! My daughter has never gone to sleep faster and its so easy to put her to bed now!

Answer 9

Get him up earlier in the morning and cut out a nap if he is still having two during the day. My guess is that he is just not tired when you are putting him to bed. Crying it out will work eventually, but I would certainly try to get him up earlier and like I said try to adjust his nap time.

Answer 10

You gotta get them on a routine. dont let them take a nap all day and no sugar after 6 oclock then put him to bed at like 830 and let him lay there and cry he will fall asleep fast and just keep doing it every night so it becomes a habit.