What should i do?

Question

oK I live with my mother-in-law, and she is so diry. She has the house dirty all the time and i or my boyfriend clean it over and over. She was on a 2 week vacation and still didnt clean. I know its her house but I cant help but to complain to my boyfriend how dirty hes family is and how they eat all the food we buy. It make us fight and be amd at each other. i cant wait to get out of their but were saving to buy a home thats why were there. But what do i do? Is it wrong to be always mad and frustrated because we have to clean after them? Should i just clean and be a maid? What do I do? Should i see it as its her house and deal with it please help give me some advise thanks>>>>
Remember I only complain to my boyfriend, I would never disresept my mother in law. She does do alot for us.

You guys are so true I shouldnt put it all on my boyfriend. And Yes I pay rent and also buy at least $500 on food for us the whole family plus whatever she needs So I think Im very helpful.

Thanks for you advise...lol

Answer 1

Shame on you. You have no right to complain at all. Nope, not even to your boyfriend. It's that women's house leave it alone. Stop frighten with your boyfriend about it, he already knows its dirty.And stop being the maid. Just clean your mess and your room up. Hey as long as your room is clean, were you and your boyfriend sleeps, that's all you need to worry about. If you don't like the rest of the house close your bedroom door. And about the food issue, stop buying so much. I no its hard but you might have to go to the store everyday or every two days to get your food,otherwise there going to eat it. I know I had to leave with people too. And the things that don't need to be cold put it in your room. So stop being mad and frustrated and stop being the maid. If you feel like cleaning don't complain about it. Just do it.And please stop complaining to your boyfriend, am sure its old and he tried of hearing it. You need to read ten stupid things couples do to mess up their relationships by Dr. Laura C. Schlessinger

Answer 2

well i had a problem kind of like this a long time ago but it was with my dad and step mom. my dad who was all ways a clean and neat person and taught us to be as well marries a total slob she is a great and loving person but has no sense of what clean is! the best thing you can do is we kept our room really clean so i spent a lot of time in there i would clean the bathroom we used after myself and my boyfriend and before i would use it those Clorox wipes are great for a quick and fast clean up if i cooked in the kitchen again i did the same thing using a wipe on the counter and then washing the pots and pans and other items i might use. did it solve the problem no did it make her a cleaner person no but that way i did not start feeling like a slave now the food thing we bought rubber maid drawer sets and stored all our dry food in side of them and then kept a small fridge in our room and only shopped for a week at a time so we did not have so much stuff at once you can find this little fridges at walmart or a home depot places like that this will help alot with them not eating your food and if you do help with the food by buying certain things for everyone then put those out and keep the rest in your room. other then that you don't have much choice it is her house and you are only there for a while more and other then maintaining your own space there is not to much you can do and hopefully if you do some of the above you and your boyfriend will fight less.

Answer 3

I think you need to go ahead and clean the house. Maybe if the in-law sees how much better the place looks with it cleaned, she will be inclined to help keep it up. If it is really dirty, maybe it is a task that is just to big for her and she is embarrassed to ask for assistance. You did not say if you were paying any rent there or not, I am assuming no since you said you are saving for a house. I think it is only right to clean the house but not necessarily be a maid. Do general cleaning and do not pick up after people (then they will rely on you to do it entirely). Also, your fiance/boyfriend/husband should have a talk with his mother if things get too rough. It may be her house, but she agreed to allow the two of you to stay there and it should be comfortable for all.

Answer 4

I'm afraid that this is the price you must pay for living in her house. You say that you are saving to buy your own? Then you must clean, and be a gracious guest. It is only a temporary situation. I would stop complaining to your boyfriend, and be the good example, if it were your house you would have to clean it anyway, just think of this as practice for after you have children because i guarantee you they will not be tidy either. Also, complaining to your boyfriend will cause friction between him, his family, and you this is not a good place to be. If it takes being a live in maid, then you will be remembered in a positive light and your boyfriend's family will continue to help you when you need it. Do you pay rent, or utilities? Then you are getting off cheap. Food is not all that expensive for living expenses. Suck it up, keep your lips buttoned, and learn to enjoy your situation, it will not last that long. And the end result will be worth it.

Answer 5

I understand that you are mad about the cleaning. You are correct, though. It is her house, and you should be thankful you have a free place to stay to save money. Cleaning just comes along with it. Stop cleaning up her messes. Maybe she doesn't do it because she knows you will. Just clean up after YOUR self and leave the rest for her. As far as the food goes, it would make me mad knowing my hard earned money went to food that was being ate up by someone else. Stop buying food too. That way you can eat the foo that they buy and then she will know how you feel. If it gets worse mabye you should consider finding somewhere free or cheap to stay. Maybe with your family, or a friend.

Answer 6

I hate to say it but while you live in her house and she is doing you a favor you really just sort of have to suck it up. Try not to clean up so much if it really bothers you. If they are fine with a mess then dont worry about it. Also i would say try not to complain to your Husband too much he'll think you dont like his family and it will cause problems. Try to find freinds that you can complain to to get it off your chest.

As for them eating your food...i would reccomend that you offer to do the grocery shopping. say you would like to help out and if everyone gave you a list and some money you would be happy to pick the stuff up for them. That way it sounds like you are being helpful not demanding money for the food they take from you. Who knows they may even appreciate it!

Good luck hope you get your house soon.

Answer 7

I can understand your frustration. I couldn't stand to live in anyone's nasty dirty house and I know it must be even more frustrating cleaning it up and having them come right behind you and trast it again. But as long as you are living in their house then you have to deal with their nastiness. You cannot tell someone that they can't be nasty in their own house. I hope that you and your husband are able to move out on your own very soon. Good luck

Answer 8

If it is really important to you to save for a house while living there, I would continue to walk on egg shells with your mother in law. Do your best to keep the house clean but leave her areas that she likes to stay in messy. Let her do her own cleaning.


Also cut your b/f some slack. He can't change his family. Their actions are their own.

Answer 9

Just think of what the ending result will be and tough it out for now. It can't be that long until you all get your own place. It's normal to be mad and frustrated, just try to be patient. It will all work out.

Answer 10

You should just find an apartment move in there and don't worry about her problems then start looking for a house it will help a lot!!!!