My 15 yr old daughter is being really disrespectful lately what can I do?

Question

I have grounded her from everything and taken away everything what is left? I have sat and talked to her and tried to figure out this change, she always apologizes but the next day its back to yelling at me and my husband and ignoring everything I ask her to do. Ive asked her if shes doing drugs and she insists she isnt, which shes always with me and really dont believe thats it. HELP PLEASE LOL

Answer 1

My son went through a similar phase around that age. I decided I would not except to be treated any worse from him then I would from anyone else. For some reason we tend to let our kids treat us the worst. I made him play by the same rules as the rest of the people in my world. If there was someone that was rude to me on a regular basis, they got nothing from me. Nothing.

The law says you have to feed your daughter and get her clothes and so forth. Not designer stuff, not her favorite food, not the best of anything right down to bathroom products! Everything above the basics is just you being nice. If anyone in the world treated you badly how nice would you want to be to them. Sooner or later your daughter will shout at you..."Why are you so mean to me!" Then calmly explain the logic that you are not being mean, you are just not being nice. To get reasonable behavior you must give reasonable behavior.

It's a true battle of wills that you can't afford to loose. Now my son is 22 and all is well. He gave me the gift of a life time a few months ago. He told me that he now appreciates, understands, and loves me for the guidance that he so hated when he was 15.

Answer 2

She's pushing limits and that's normal for a 15 year old girl. She's trying to find herself, but that's no reason to be disrespectful.

Don't engage her when she yells - tell her that's not how you are going to discuss the situation and until she can talk like an adult, the conversation is over. When she finally does decide to talk, discuss the issue that was originally brought up and don't address the behavior. You cannot constantantly discuss her behaviour as she may not even know why she is acting this way. Hormones are raging at 15 and she's getting pressure for all angles. The media pushes being thin and perfect, HS kids are just plain cruel, issues at home, etc. Just try to live and have her function as you expect and make time for conversations about her and how she's feeling when it's good for her. Don't force it. If she starts to get agitated when talking, just stop and do something else.

Answer 3

Sounds like she may be seeking some independance. At 15 she not a kid anymore but not quite and adult either. How is she doing in school? Are her grades OK? Have you tried asking her what she thinks the problem in your relationship is? What does she think needs to be done to smooth out the relationship with you. Maybe together you and her can work something out at least until she's 18 she can either get a job and move out or go to college.

I feel many kids will try to get some type of independence during those years... they usually don't really appreciate their parents again till they are in there 26+. When they find out they really don't know everything in the world.

Good luck, I know it won't be easy.

Answer 4

Call her primary physician and state the problem. He or she will guide you to a Dr. of psychology or psychiatry for the appropriate treatment for her. She may need nothing more than counseling. Family counseling is great. Been there done this. We got through it all together. Kids are doing great now and very well adjusted. If there is any drug use the professionals will know as you will. Good luck.

Answer 5

15 is a tender age for any teenager. i'm 16 and i know that sometimes, i yell at my parents too but in the end i really love them and would sacrifice everything for them. the fact that she apologizes shows that she knows she's in the wrong. it's difficult for teenagers to say sorry because we always feel we're right but saying sorry is the first step to realizing one's mistake and admitting it. you must have trust in her and once in a while, tell her how much you care. go shopping with her so that you can bond with her instead of keeping her at home because she'll probably hold a grudge against you for making her life so restricted even though you just care and love her a lot.

Answer 6

stand your ground! your taking control of the situation and she isn't happy with it. just keep doing what you do because she is getting older. don't yell at her just talk to her in a normal tone voice. there's probably something bothering her, perhaps with you or the parents in general? i know when i was at that age i was out of control and hated talking to my parents. just stand your ground and talk to her, but make sure you give her her space too.

Answer 7

Stand up to her. I Know you think you are (with grounding her, etc.) but, she still has control in the relationship because she knows how to push your buttons. You know how you're in the grocery store and you see a kid cutting up and you say to yourself, if he was mine, blah blah blah. With strangers, kid seem to do better, but with mommy, they are terrors. Trust me, it's the same with teenagers. My son respects nothing but drill seargent mommy. I'm consistent, I have no time for his mess and he knows it. I've also been doing a little reading on passive aggressive personalities...check it out.

Answer 8

start her in some sort of community project with underpriveleged children. this should wake her up to see that she has a lot to be grateful for.

she is at a rebellious stage in life and just needs to be kept occupied.

Answer 9

well my sis is also like this............but my mom gave her 2 tight slaps and after 2-3 weeks she was alright and respectfull.her name is mehak........

Answer 10

Please be patient, she will grow out of it, if you can survive this phase.