Is it appropiate for a mother to buy cigarettes for her 15 year old son?

Question

My 15 year old stepson seems to have now manipulated his mother into buying his cigarettes. I am flabbergasted about it. Her excuse is that he is going to smoke no matter what she does. Although that is more then likely true, should she be helping him out like this? This situation is causing friction between her and I

Answer 1

Definitely not!! I used to smoke as a teen and in my early 20's (I quit 3 years ago) and my mom used to buy me cigarettes too when I was that age. When I look back on it now, I get really upset thinking about it. She shouldn't have done that just to please me. Parents need to be responsible and help their kids make positive decisions in life, not add to their youthful irresponsibility by encouraging bad habits. Would she buy him alcohol? Weed? Heroin? Where will it end? This may seem extreme to some people, but if a child can manipulate a parent for smokes, it won't be long before he conniving for other things. She needs to have a backbone and stand up to him. Well if he gets them elsewhere, he gets them elsewhere and neither of you will have it on your conscious that you actually contributed to his future health problems!!

Answer 2

she shouldnt be encouraging her son to smoke. now he's gonna think that he could manipulate her even more when he decides to take more of an interest in other types of drugs. true, he could always get cigarettes from his friends or from a complete stranger, but his mother should be responsible enough not to let her son endanger his life like this and somehow teach her son lessons and mayb discipline him. otherwise, he's just walking all over her. at the same time, u gotta look at his age. he's fifteen, not like twenty-one or anything. if his mother doesnt do anything to stop him from getting cigarettes, then mayb u should. you;ve also gotta remember what this sorta thing does to you. it can give you cancer. do you really wanna see your stepson go through cancer and damage his life like that, or do u wanna put a stop to it now before it gets out of hand?

Answer 3

ABSOLUTELY NOT! For years now, there has been so much information about cigarettes causing Cancer and the addiction to them. There is an age limit on buying cigarettes for a reason and for her to buy them for an under aged kid is illegal. The parent is supposed to help their children to live a better and healthier life, not poison it from the starting gate.

She is placing a health and financial burden on your family and your stepson that he will have to live with until he can kick the bucket and stop smoking.

Good luck to you.

Answer 4

I would begin by saying that that mother does not love her son,even if her son would become a smoker in the future which she can not tell for sure that he would, it should not be the mother who should encourage such habits.As for you why not be friend with her son and try to reach his heart as you carry out your research on the harmful effect of smoking and prayers too.Never allow him defeat you whenever you discuss and don't let him confuse or convince you-cos you need the confidence to do this. You can also talk to wife about it in a loving manner,not bent on winning an arguement.Just pray to God for strength and guidiance whenevr you feel like talking to them but don't destroy your home with anger from their attitude.

Answer 5

No cause it's looking like she's accepting it, actually you can't stop a 15 year old who wants to smoke, they think the know everything better than adults but what you can do is scare the hell out of him with pictures that show what's happening inside of him

Answer 6

I must say this just more like helping the kid to kill himself with the poison that he sucked from every cigarette he smoked. Your wife's actions not just doesn't help to solve the problem but she is making her son smoke more with her approval. If the kid is not care about his own life, no matter how hard you try to help him and at the end you just know that the answer is "the kid is hopeless". If he insist on smoke no matter how hard your wife try to stop him, I must say it's best to let the kid smoke on his own expenses of course. After all, smoking does need money to support right?

Answer 7

Well, she is the bilogical mother, and plus she's right. He'll get the cigarettes either way. At least for the time being the kids just smoking cigarettes. A lot of mothers buy their kids cigarettes. Its no big thing.

Answer 8

I think it is wrong. As a mother, she is supposed to be looking after the welfare of her son. Yes, me might grow up to be a smoker whether she buys his cigarettes or not, but that doesn't mean she should help him get them. For all she knows, he's taking them to school and giving them to his friends- so then she'd be contributing to their future health problems.

Let her know how you feel and make sure she knows that this seriously bothers you. Hope yo get something figured out.

Answer 9

If she is taking it as a change to befriend her son and ultimately manipulate him in giving up the habit after a time, perhaps, she is trying her own approach but do talk to her that if she has just accepted it as a chore, it's wrong and let him buy his own cigarettes.

Answer 10

I personally don't think it is a good idea. It seems to me that she is just making it easier for him to smoke. It is illegal for someone to buy cigarettes for someone under age. It may be true that he would smoke anyway but at least it would be harder for him to get the cigarettes to smoke. I don't think she is making a wise decision.