Thinking about it maturely, if two people really love each other (don't say a 15 year old doesn't know love because it's not that simple), would it be ok for them to be dating. And they aren't having sex yet, the guy is dead set on the answer no too, he is not trying to get with her like that. The guy is 19 but honorable and more worried about the age difference because he thinks he will be taking advantage of her. He is not the kind of guy who would but he still feels like he isn't doing the right thing. The 15 year old is a girl who is sort of neurotic and clingy. Both are on the same maturity level and of relatively the same intelligence. They have know each other a very long time and are very close friends too.
2007-01-03 19:40:25 · 19 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
Also they both know they are probably going to be together for a long time if they do start dating even now.
2007-01-03 19:43:29 · update #1
Ok I said it up there in my description, he told her no they will not be having sex because she isn't legal and it wouldn't be right of him.
2007-01-03 19:47:24 · update #2
The parents do know and understand and support it. This guy is not at all the ****** type either. He is shy and smart and has morals.
And she is a sophomore in highschool...not freshman. She's only a bit clingy not calls every hour clingy.
2007-01-03 19:50:58 · update #3
For the third time there is no sex involved. I am talking about two people makng an agreement that they won't date other people, not two people getting in bed with each other. You don't need sex to have a relationship and trust me when I say it couldn't be more true for this situation. I am neither the girl or the guy btw. And they are on the same maturity level because she is a smart girl who actually thinks about things and discusses them, same with him. What I meant by that was that on most things they meet eye to eye. Also, I said A BIT neurotic and clingy..by that I meant her close friends are the only ones who can really see it and she is that way about everything not limiting it to relationships. I didn't mean raving psycho neurotic and clingy. Please think about your answer to this because I am not interested at all in the NO NO they are totally different it's illegal!!! answers. Every situation is different and if you say that then I have wasted my time with this explanation.
2007-01-03 20:06:51 · update #4
That's a big age gap. I think whether or not it is okay depends on your maturity and his intentions.
If he is going to care for you, look after you, love you, and protect you then yes, go for it.
Also, your parents would have to be okay with it. There are many factors to take into consideration. Ultimately, if his intentions are pure, then I think it is ok.
If the boyfriend has pure intentions, is going to love her, protect her, and guide her, why and how is that bad? "Because it's illegal!" Is not a good enough answer.
Some of you have no idea how most public schools are. I would rather (if I had a daughter) have my daughter date someone with pure intentions rather than a horny, bad boy, immature 15 year old. Most of these little boys hold contests of how many girls they can sleep with, have unprotected sex, all they care about and revolve their life around is sex, party, sex. So to have someone with such pure intentions interested in a daughter would be somewhat of a blessing.
*BUT* I would TRULY have to know what type of person he is, how he is, and I would have to know him like a son.
So yes, in conclusion: If his intentions are pure, why not?
2007-01-03 19:50:23 · answer #1 · answered by Tommy_Turrican 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Honestly, I think a 4 year distance is too much. I have a sister who is 4 years younger than me and I see how nieve her and her friends (guy friends) can be. (I'm 18). Besides, for me, dating someone that young would be like dating my sister's friend. yuck.
Just wondering...how is a 19 year old (who has probably been though high school and is in college) on the the same level of maturity and intelegence as a 15 year old (who just started high school and is just going through what the 19 year old came out of)?
Somebody probably said this already, but if the 15 year old and the 19 year old have sex the 19 year old can be charged for statuatory rape. If the girl gets pregnant that's a whole other set of stuff to go through. Honestly, I think they both have more growing up to do (especially the neurotic and clingy 15 year old) before they get in over their heads have start having sex.
2007-01-03 19:58:24 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 2⤋
I would have to question whether two people at such a young age know what love really is. The age difference isn't that big of a deal since girls usually mature faster then boys emotionally. Since both of you are mature enough to wait to have sex that is definitely a good step in the right direction.
I'd say take it slow and get to know each other better. As both of you get older, there is always the possibility someone else will come along for either you or him. You have to be ready to let go if that happens. It may be devastating to even think about it, but I'm sure neither of you would want to commit to each other if you end up not being right for each other.
Time will tell whether it lasts or not.
2007-01-03 20:16:30 · answer #3 · answered by milwaukiedave 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I would say no. The 19 year old guy will be turning 20 and will no longer be a teen and certain things will be expected of him, specifically maturity. Dating a 15 or 16 year old girl is not mature, and chances are that either the guy or the girl will regret the relationship two years down the line. But if they truly do love each other and can accept that society will not be eager to welcome their age difference and can also think in terms of the future, the relationship will have a chance.
2007-01-03 19:44:06 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
If the gentleman was honorable he would be looking for someone around his own age. The thought processes and maturity at the age of 19 and 15 are completely different, despite what you think.If he feels like he's not doing the right thing that means he probably isn't. And if you have yourself fooled into thinking he doesn't care about sex you are wrong.And even a year down the road when you are 16 and he is 20 and your start having sexual interaction you are possibly looking at legal trouble for him. All around it's a bad situation and in this day and age I would advise against it.
2007-01-03 19:48:18 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
It's an acceptible difference in age in about 10 years. But until she is of legal age, it is not. Maturity does not matter, as there are laws out there to splash a pail of cold water on this scenerio. The fact is, he is legally an adult and she is legally a child. So the mature decision for them both to make would be to remain 'friends only' until she is of legal age. That way, there won't be any question as to his intentions or any false accusations by the authorities or other adults. (HELLO, MOM AND DAD!!) If they really love each other, they will to hold off on any romantic involvement until they both hit the same level legally.
2007-01-03 19:47:30 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
love shouldnt have an age but in some folks eyes there is to me if they really wanted to date then the need to wait a couple yrs after all he is grown and he will want things in life that she isnt ready to do im sure she is still in school she has her whole life ahead of her and if they are in the maturity level will then she either grown up too fast or he hasnt grown up enough a 19 yr needs to late the 15 have her life dont be in a hurry to grow up
2007-01-03 19:55:35 · answer #7 · answered by debbie o 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
it is dangerous for a 15 year old to date a 19 year old. he also could be lying to u about not being ready for sex. he's in college and the girl's in high school which is like two different worlds. one more question : do the parents know that thier 15 year old daughter is dating a 19 year old?
2007-01-03 19:47:24 · answer #8 · answered by birdy 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
It does not matter if they love each other. The bottom line is that it's not legal. If they have sex that is considered statutory rape, and the guy could go to jail. If they truly care about each other, they would wait 3 years until they could be together legally.
2007-01-03 19:45:20 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well, in the US it's illegal. All cases aren't the same, but when it comes down to it, these laws were set into place for a reason. In most cases, older guys manipulate, use, and treat younger girls like crap. They are pushier when it comes to sex, but still too immature to deal with the consequences their actions have.
2007-01-03 19:45:26 · answer #10 · answered by Kerry 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋