How can I learn to accept myself for who I am?

Question

I have been overweight all my life. I am trying to deal with the fact that I will never be skinny. I just cant seem to stop thinking of myself as an ugly fat cow. It makes me not want to be around a lot of people b/c I am always worried that someone is making fun of me or thinking that I look bad. I would like to be happy with myself.

Answer 1

Not a quick fix, of course, but start by getting to know yourself first. You said "accept myself for who I am". That sounds very much like you think that your body make up is who you are. Not a chance. You have a mind and soul as well as a body. When you meet someone new, do you judge them completely by their size? I doubt it, your more sensitive than that. You see their personality, their voice, their talents, their heart, and you get to know them based on those qualities. Try that with yourself. You deserve as much from yourself. Start with one thing you like about the self you meet. Then go ahead indulge-there's that other little thing you like too-right? Go slow and mean it. Pretty soon you'll get to know yourself for who you REALLY are. It's not easy and it takes time and effort, but it truely does work. I know very well. It's amazing what we find inside when we take the time to look. By the way, if you find anything you don't like-treat yourself just like you would your best friend. you deserve it

Answer 2

I'm sorry you feel so bad, we all have those down times and as far as accepting yourself, I think you already have but you CAN help yourself to look better, one day at a time. UFC is a very strong hateful way to describe yourself and your motivation should be that you dont want to call yourself that anymore nor do you want ANYone else call or think that of you. No matter what your weight is, there is always, and I mean always a way to lose some weight- you start with baby steps---write your foods down for one day- see all the bad stuff and dont eat them the next and so forth-- substitute the bad for good stuff that tastes good like fruit, sugar free products- lean cuisine meals, etc. Every week take one weekend night and "treat" yourself- eat one of the foods that you have taken yourself off-- by doing this, you are not denying yourself some sinful pleasures. As you see yourself losing just a little, you may feel energized to walk just a little more and if you get ambitious, or if you have a dog, do it daily even if it's for 5 minutes to start--- in one month you will be walking over 30 minutes and you will have lost probably about 10 lbs at least.... baby steps, that is the answer-- trying to join gyms, crash diets, etc all that does is make us feel more depressed and inept to succeed--- I'm down 90 doing this and need to looks another 50 before June---just on baby steps and by the way, it's my program no one orchestrated it but it works for me and you can alter the plan to suit your lifestyle because remember, we're talking about the rest of your life so a little a month x months and months equals a lot of weight lost. If you have any doubt about yourself, watch the Biggest Loser on TV- the exercise is way too physical for me because of my illnesses, but it inspires me to get my butt in gear everyday. I'll be rooting for you!!!

Answer 3

Accepting your self isn't approximately what you look like butabout who you're. At 13, very almost all people has self esteem themes. between the justifications why bullies bully, they are attempting to undermine all people else so as that all of us experience as rotten as them. issues that enhance self esteem are actual interest, training, participation in any of the humanities - from watching a stay overall performance or going to the flicks, attaining targets. on your mirror which you employ each and every morning, write out constructive affirmations for your self. i'm a great person; i'm a great pal; i glance reliable right this moment- etc. examine those daily. verify that they are correct on your life. Make your targets achievable. loose 2lb each and every week. each and every week including your suited friends birthday - take excitement in the occasion.

Answer 4

give it to the god of your understanding let me tell you i am 160 lbs @ 5ft 9in right now but i have also been 120 lbs @ this height and i have also been 300 lbs @ this height.

docs were ready to do a gastric i couldn't stand what i saw anymore so i decided ok enough is enough went on diet went from 300 down to 120 in 9 months no pills no surgeries just a healthy diet,

let me tell you i am very blessedto be @ this weight now i went on this diet in novemvber of 2003 and by june 2004 i was 120 lbs it got ugly i klnew this so i decided it was time to gain sum weight and so i did and have maintained my weight since.

everything is all about acceptance and you don't need anyone's approval but your own and your higher power's which you have stop beating yourself up and learn to love yourself and once you do others will love and respect you as well i am 32 years old .

started gaining weight @ age 11 and until i was 29 years old i was very heavy so take my word for it and give it to the god of your understanding through christ jesus (thats just for me for you it may be someone or something else) anything is possible.

if you Don't Or Won't Allow Yourself believe in god Just believe that i believe and lets just call GOD Good Orderly Direction for now feel free to borrow my GOD if you like he is very forgiving, understanding,compassionate,loving,loyal,gentle,fun,humorous & omni Present amongst other things GOD (As You Understand Him/Her/It) Bless You

Yes For Those Of You Asking Yourself I Am A Very Grateful Recovering Drug user & Alcohol Abuser With A Name ANd A Problem Called Ray Clean Date 08-01-2001

Answer 5

It's the feeling of being isolated by your condition that is making you unhappy. further isolating yourself from people is only going to make that worse. you need to realize you aren't alone in this, and in fact there are others like you. it wouldn't hurt to see a Dr. about getting some antidepressants. i'm overweight too, but i take meds for a chemical imbalance that both influenced the weight gain, and at the same time helps me not care what people think...not antidepressant, different ball game.

Answer 6

Here is the opposite of what you wrote and starting here:

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I get to experience being alive no matter what my weight. I get to effortlessly enjoy being who I am now. I think of myself as a beautiful, deserving and loving human being just the way I am right now. I enjoy being around a lot of people and feel confident that someone is admiring my positive outlook. I can do what I set my mind to do effortlessly and easily.

I am happy with myself right now.

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Now, here is your assignment. You take that affirmation that you find hard to believe above and paste it where you can see it every single day in your long mirror and you will brain wash yourself to feel and create that very truth.

Let me explain. Have you ever marveled at the stars on a clear night? That's who you really are and if you think of yourself of anything less, you are sinning against every cell in your body. Love yourself. Love you. You are deserving and loving. You are caring a loving. You can do whatever you set your mind to, with love. Every cell of your body is creation and you are nothing less.

Also, visualize what the word "skinny" means to you and write down all the words that defines it for you. Then, review the information and see if it serves who you are or if it does not.

The purpose is to find out that there is nothing you can't do.

Get the word "try" out of the equasion, too. You can do whatever you dream.

LLJames

Answer 7

Take some Yoga classes. You can't really know how to be happy with yourself if you don't explore what that "self" is. Believe me, deep down, you do love yourself. It's called the survival instinct. Change is good. You will be happy with yourself if you put in the effort. Many people just can't or don't want to put in the effort. I understand. Every form of refuge has its price, though. Experiment.

Answer 8

ya know, just dont give a crap about what people think. look at yourself. really really look at yourself. Find the things that are good and dwell on them. For example, I focus on my very pretty brown eyes and dancer legs rather than my bushy hair, big nose, and my flabby stomach. I think alot of overweight women are gorgeous. They tend to have the most beautiful faces.

Answer 9

How much you weigh is NOT who you are! I am the opposite I guess - everyone says I am too skinny. You have to get the attitude that I finally have....this is ME - take it or leave it! Do NOT think of yourself so badly!!! Just be you and if someone doesn't like it...too frigging bad!

Answer 10

I find that if you are involved in things you like - if you eat healthy most of the time, if you get some sort of exercise, and you always look your best because YOU want to - acceptance of yourself will come.