I have been engaged to the man of my dreams for over a year now. He recently took a new job, (that he loves) but he has to travel away for weeks at a time. When he is home, all I want to do is spend time with him. Yet, I hardly ever get alone time with him. (Besides right before bed) He wants to spend time with his friends and family when he is home. Is it selfish of me to want him to myself for a little while during the day when he is home?
I get so upset, because we used to spend a lot of one-on-one time together. And now, I almost feel like we are so distant from one another. I have talked to him about it, so he knows how I feel. Any advice on how we can overcome this?
2007-01-03 15:51:20 · 7 answers · asked by Olivia 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
I think you need to try and balance both your need for attention and his need for his time for himself and hist time with friends and family. I don't think it is unfair for you to want time with him but you should realize that he is also away from friends and family when he travels. Try and set maybe a list of things you guys can do together but don't swarm and overwhelm him when he gets home. Come out and just say I'd like to go to the movies with you tomorrow night or stay home and watch TV or whatever. Don't just say I don't have enough time with you. Guys don't know what to do with that. Also, you should find activities that you can enjoy alone like a hobby or get some girlfriends to go shopping, movies, or a girls' night out. That way you won't miss him so much when you are gone and you both can enjoy stress free time together when he is home.
2007-01-03 15:56:50 · answer #1 · answered by whowhat? 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Thats really tough... I know how you feel, my husband is in the military and I always feel like his job is pulling him away from me and it always does feel like a competition to spend time with him... It takes alot to get used to but you just gotta appreciate the time you can spend with him whether its alone or with other friends and family. Only you can control your happiness and if you still cant be happy and settle into this lifestyle you have then maybe it isnt the right lifestyle for you.. Goodluck!
2007-01-03 23:56:32 · answer #2 · answered by brighteyes22_22 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
you guys need to set a specific time apart for you two to go out or just spend time together alone. without any interuptions or excuses and since it would be thought of ahead of time you both know that you will have time for each other. he needs to make time for you so that the relationship will stay in tact and why would he spend time with his friends before you? there is something wrong there. but hopefully you can fix this problem.
2007-01-04 00:22:25 · answer #3 · answered by Mrs.Dennis 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I would give ANYTHING to have my husband to at least sleep right next to. Right now he's in Afghanistan, so that's not happening. I think you guys need to have another talk. You are going to MARRY this guy but I don't think its that serious of a problem. Its not like he's doing anything wrong? Just make sure that you choose your battles wisely.
2007-01-03 23:56:55 · answer #4 · answered by Sandy H 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You will never overcome it honey. My dad was gone when I was a kid on a job and my mom was always lonely. Just make the most of your time together that you do have. I hope this helped?
2007-01-03 23:55:02 · answer #5 · answered by Amberlee :D 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
move out and see if he notices your gone.
bet he changes his attitude, tell him that you are better of alone then to feel like your being punished day after day.
or feeling like your being rejected al the time.
i moved out and now he notices when i'm not in bed with him to cuddle with.
now he respects me for it.
so now you take control don't let him do it to you.
GOOD LUCK!!
p.s. now he takes me out again. and is sweet the whole while we are together.
and i don't spend the night at his house but one day a week.
so it's always on my terms. not his.
2007-01-04 00:04:05 · answer #6 · answered by tabatha 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
you should have sex that always work
2007-01-03 23:55:23 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 2⤋