Should I get married or not ?

Question

I've known my boyfriend for over a year now but we've only been dating for 1 month . I always had a huge crush on him and he's always had one on me , Now that we're together things are great , he wants to marry me , is it too soon to marry him even though we know each other longer than we are dating or should we wait ? Honest opnions please . Thank You.

Please be more in detail , yes we should wait , yes we should get married ?? the person who said no , no to what ?? waiting or getting married ?

Thank u all for the well wishes :)

I am way over 21

Answer 1

That's up to you. What's good for us isn't what's good for you because each situation is different. I got engaged in Oct 06 after dating my fiancee 7 months, and our wedding date is Sept 2, 2007. To us this this is exactly the speed that we are comfortable with, but for someone else they might not feel the same way.

I say if this is what you want to do then go for it. Remember it's your wedding.

Answer 2

To me the final question is; how mature do you consider your relationship to be? You've known each other for over a year, but you've only dated for a month. How much do you REALLY know about him. No not just things like eye color, shoe size etc. I mean does he have your back , so to speak, emotionally, as well as physically? Do you have his? How much do you trust him? How much does he trust you? Can you see yourself with him when you're 80? When you two are together what do you do? Sex? Talk? About what? Do you talk about your lives together? Do you make plans for your futures together? What about kids? What if you, or he, gets fat? What if he, or you, or the both of you goes broke? What if he or you loses your job, and can't or don't work for a long while? Are you ready to dedicate your life to making him happy? Is he to you? How much baggage do you, or he carry from previous relationships? Could any of it wash ashore on your island of marital paradise, so to speak? Is he your best friend? Are you his?
To me, It's hard to believe you've done all this in a month. The year before, might have held infatuation, and you may have gotten to know each other on a friends or co-workers level, but to me it's what's happened this last month that you should focus on since that's the time period you've had when you've declared to each other your love for each other, and explored a serious relationship together. If you really want a yes or no answer, right now I'd say no, not yet. Give it at least 6-8 months, and preferrably add a year to that. Stay together, love each other. Get to really know each other. But don't rush it. A year or so down the line you'll either be royally pissed off every time you have to seperate, and can't wait until you can be together again, or not. Right now you probably can't wait to be together, and thats expected of a new relationship. But you have to see if that feeling has legs that'll carry you on the long haul.
Good luck to the both of you.
I really do hope the two of you make it
God Bless.

Answer 3

One month is not a long time to be going out together to get hitched. I do know of one couple that got engaged after only 3 dates and remain together today (33 years later while the rest of us are all divorced, some numerous times) but this is very few and far between. You two should get to know each other much better, as although you may have known each other for a year I'm certain that there are still many things that you need to find out about each other. We all have character defects and some of yours may turn him off or visa versa. Best of luck to you and have a happy 2007.

Answer 4

My opinion... Wait to be asked. If it has been asked, then set a date far away. not to "make sure" but just to give yourselves time to set things up, and become even closer. My wife and I knew each other a lot longer than we dated. We lived together first, and then got married and I could not be happier. What it comes down to is follow your heart. Do you see yourself waking up next to this man for the rest of your life? If you learn new things about him after marriage, can you handle that and adapt around each other? If the answers are yes, I say go for it. Just take you time. A wedding should be a good experience and not rushed.

Answer 5

If you are under the age of 21, I think that you are too young to get married. You should wait til your older, til you are sure that this is the guy you want to spend the rest of your life with (and that you cannot live without). Go explore the world and travel to places. -I wouldn't get married so soon to a guy that you have only been dating for a month. (Hold off for a while.)
Just tell him that you want to get to know him for a while longer and that you are not ready to commit to marriage.
(Marriage is a big step in someones life... like a new chapter in a story.)

(Plus if you are unsure, then that means that you are not ready and it is too soon. Wait until you are SURE and can make up your own mind.)

Answer 6

You should sit down with your boyfriend and really discuss how the both of you feel about it. No matter how many answers you get from this site, the final decision is up to y'all. Personally, if you've really talked to each other about it and feel that y'all are ready and in love, then I say you should definitely go for it. It takes different people a different amount of time to get to know one another. Whether that's as friends or a couple doesn't really matter. Me and my fiance were best friends for 4 years before we started dating. We were talking marriage one month into our dating relationship. We've been dating for close to 3 years now and we've been enaged for a year of that. We feel it's the right thing for us....our feelings haven't changed while we've been engaged. Good luck on making your decision and remember to follow your heart.

Answer 7

regardless of how long you have known your boyfriend - if you have to ask then the answer has to be - NO - at least not yet.
the fact that you are asking others means you are not quite ready yourself to take that next step.
I only knew the guy I married ; for 6months when we got married ; he asked me to move in with him after only going out for 6 weeks- I did wait for a few more months. he lived in another town about 2 hours drive away.
we were married for 24years & did then part ways - BUT this can happen regardless of how long you have known your partner.
1 of my aunts married within a couple of months of meeting her husband & they were married for 40+ years until her death
talk with your boyfriend about what you both expect from a marriage; do you both want children , how many & in what time frame, thoughts on raising the children (religion;discipline;schooling) how would you handle finances,
once you are both sure of common ground on these & other issues - then you will be more ready for the step.
remember a marriage doesn't just happen
it requires BOTH parties to be continually putting in an effort to keep the relationship going.
it requires open & on-going communication; willingness to compromise ( NOT sacrifice), an awareness that not every day is going to be great- but that you are prepared to work together to overcome the down days.
think about not whether you can spend the rest of your llife with this man - BUT if you can spend it without him as an integral part of your life.
GOOD LUCK & cherish each other

Answer 8

Although you've known each other a bit longer, I still think you need to have more time to really get to know each other before you decide to get married. You've been spending serious time together for only 1 month, so take it easy, get to know each other's goals, plans, dreams, etc. and enjoy dating a while longer. Making a commitment for a lifetime is serious so you want to be sure that this is the person you want to spend your life with. There's no need to rush...just enjoy being together for now.

Answer 9

I would absolutely wait...If you know it's right then why not wait a little bit and get to know each other a little better! If things don't work out at least you didn't rush into things and make a rash decision! Take it slow and enjoy the beginning stages of the relationship. Good Luck and I hope you guys last forever!

Answer 10

i would definitely wait until you are 100% positive you want to marry this guy and make sure you live with him for at least a year. i was with my bf for over 7 years before i married him. we met right after highschool and now we are married and just had a baby...things are so wonderful, but we are still learning new things about eachother even to this day...(i am not saying that you have to wait that long but being with him for only one month might be too soon. i hope this is helpful!!