My boyfriend of 7years does not work, he is disabled. I myself work full-time. He does nothing all day but play video games on his xbox360 or watch tv. When I ask him for help or tell him that I need help with things around the house, he always has some kind of excuse. He can't even take out our dogs when I am at home on my days off of work. Not only do I work full-time, which are overnights, I do ALL the housework, including picking up HIS messes that he leaves, wash his clothes and his childrens, do not only all of the dishes but have to scrape his food off of his plates and such that he leaves lay all around. Yes, I have numerous times told him that I can't deal with it anymore and that I am going to leave him if he can't help out more and play his video games less. Each time I say that I am leaving he will tell me that before I take anything out of our place, yes just my things nothing else, that I have to pay back what money I supposedly owe him which is nothing.
2007-01-03 11:11:18 · 12 answers · asked by kerrberr95 5 in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
What should I do, I am totally confused and no, I have no family in the area to go to since they all live atleast 3-4 hours away and no car of my own. I have been using my boyfriends, which is another thing since everytime I say I want a car of my own so I don't have to depend on using his car to get to and from work, he thinks I want one so I will leave him. Any advice will be totally helpfull. Oh, I forgot to tell you, if it helps, I am 30yrs. old and he is almost 35yrs. old.
2007-01-03 11:13:49 · update #1
Sharma.....yes he does get a disability check. No we are not married and my name is not on the lease. We do not rent an apartment, we live in a mobile home and it is just his name on the title of it.
2007-01-03 11:20:57 · update #2
well first of all i would like say that i am sorry you are in that situation.
You are very young and hes taking you for granted. This happens quite often to other couples. The man dont appreciate their partner and they dont think they need to make any changes in their lives but if you love your partner you must commit to helping eachother out. The worst thing is that you are allowing him to treat you like a maid or a slave. women should not allow this to happen. He thinks that you cannot make it on your own he knows you dont have a place to go or a car to drive to work and he thinks your trapped. You need to go and get a car under your name you work and you dont have to put up with this jerk. Your not even married to him.
Is not easy to get out of a relationship you must think first before you act on it. I think you should teach a lesson Leave him look for a place to rent. Talk to a friend and see if you can stay with them for a while until you can rent.
Theres alot of people who are looking for a roomate.Buy the sunday newspaper for the local adds for an apartment. Alot of the times you have leave and to make him realize that hes wrong. Otherwise he will never apreciate what he has. They say you never know what you have until its gone!!!!!!!!!!!
Leaving is not easy. Good luck
2007-01-04 08:42:07 · answer #1 · answered by ellie 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
is your name on the lease? why have you been made into his maid. just cause he is disabled dont mean he cant pick up or help in the house. that sounds like a lame excuse.
taek your stuff and go. you dont owe him nothing. were you two married? if he is disabled, why dont he draw a check.
you may have been played all this time, a disabled person draws a check cause how are they going to survive.
honey get your stuff and split. next guy you get with, make sure he knows to help you out, 50/50 relationship.
if he aint working, and not drawing a check, how do you owe him money. he sounds like a leach, a bum, get out and live your life.
you are better than to be made into a servant for his lazy ***.
2007-01-03 11:17:34 · answer #2 · answered by sharma 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
when he tells you you owe him money ask him to prove it unless he has receipts and a agreement or you said hey i will pay for half the couch then you owe him nothing and he would have to take you to court and prove it so if your unhappy leave and let him try to get money from you in the end he will not get the full value of things because he and his kids have used them also and over time the value of things go down especially house hold items hell be lucky if he gets anything and in some cases he might end up owing you something if you have receipts for things you paid for. so stop being afraid of this threat unless you know you do owe him something he is just saying this because it works and it stops you! your his girlfriend not his slave! if you are not married you don't need his permission to get a car so go and get one. if he is 35 and still this way sorry to say he is not changing anything!
2007-01-03 11:21:30 · answer #3 · answered by peterpansdate 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Leave him - that's all i can think of. You should have done this long time back. You must be soo stressed out, doing the chores, working full time, taking care of the children, that seriously sucks. 30 is not a bad age to start your own life, trust me. you'll be so much better without him, leave him and start your own life. if he asks for the money you owe him, throw it on his face and walk off, and if you dont have so much cash, tell him to pay you because of the chores you've been doing. my my, i'd hate to be you, sorry. your boyfriend has just trapped you, leave him. go to your parent's house for a few days, get a new job, and start your own life. trust me, you deserve MUCH more than a stupid moron who can only play games on his xbox.
2007-01-03 11:18:49 · answer #4 · answered by cartman 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
via cheating on him you began your courting off on a bad word. Why are you preserving this different guy around? in case you do no longer choose him then block him, he should not be putting around you adult men anymore, don't be in contact with him! the two way, i think of its time to call it quits between the two certainly one of you, all have faith is long gone, he went by way of your telephone for a reason, he felt as though something grew to become into occurring. he's injury and there is no longer plenty you're able to do to alter that, he would not have the skill to recover from what you probably did to him. pass on, take area from him and if he needs to paintings issues out he will come back to you. i do no longer propose it nonetheless, your courting is kinda tainted now.
2016-10-06 09:45:22 · answer #5 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
sounds like you got a choice. Get you a car. leave his messes for him! start you a stash somewhere and don't tell anyone. when you got enough leave and don't go back. You are squandering you youth on someone who appears to be self centered and drowning in self pity and likes where he is. You are his servant. Tell him it is he who owes you. and walk. He dosnt believe you will leave and see no reason to change! Do you want to grow old with this man! Do you like being treatedlike this. :If so leave. Do something for yourself! you are doing him no favor by catering and cleaning up after him!
2007-01-03 11:23:35 · answer #6 · answered by tennessee 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It doesn't sound like he appreciates you at all. He probably needs to realize exactly what he have-a good woman!!!! Since he is disabled he may feel as if he can't do things or feel hopeless or helpless.It may be hard for him to cope with not being normal but anyhow you may have to leave him in order for him to change and for him to realize you are serious. A relationship is supposed to be 50-50. If you lack in one area, you be stronger in another.
2007-01-03 11:15:37 · answer #7 · answered by RoxieC 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
you need to secretly start saving and looking for an apt etc and then start packing etc secretly and then just LEAVE.
he sounds like a toxic guy and im sorry but no one needs a parasite who doesn't provide anything. and if you dont owe him anything.. then u dont owe him anything theres no way he can make u pay for something if there aren't any legal papers.
ignore w/e he's telling you.. gather ur stuff and get out of there asap
2007-01-03 11:17:27 · answer #8 · answered by hehehe 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sounds to me like he is lazy and needs a maid and fit the description. Why not call someone from your family and see if they might be willing to come and get you and help you get back on your feet. Women were not put on this earth solely to wait on men. Even though they think we were. Good luck and god bless.
2007-01-03 11:47:23 · answer #9 · answered by Snowflake25 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Disabled or not tell him to get off his a-- or you are through. If he can play video games all day I'm sure he can find a job with all his computor skills.
2007-01-03 11:39:54 · answer #10 · answered by Aberdeen 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋