2007-01-03 03:03:57 · 27 answers · asked by Chef Josh 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Weddings
Thats not very nice of you. Its not just her day its your day too!! Though my fiance is not helping plan everything he is helping out wiht the main stuff like the church, where the reception will be held, Dj and photographer. I would hope you would help her with that because those are very important and should be decided by both of you since it is not just her day. Help out with the big stuff I am sure it will make your bride to be very happy and this a special day that both of you should look foward too. Good Luck and best of Luck!
2007-01-03 03:10:25 · answer #1 · answered by SO In LOVE 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Well, it is your day as well-you are getting married too! I don't think its necessary that you help with everything down to the color of the napkins, but you need to lend a hand when she asks. This is a VERY stressful time for us brides and we need all the support we can get from our soon-to-bes. Take it from a bride who is 79 days out from her wedding with a groom whose less that enthusiatic....when she asks you to get the addresses from your mom-do it, if she needs you to call your ushers and tell them where to get the tuxes-just do it...if she needs you to give her ideas for a rehearsal dinner site, just look in the phone book and get a few. These are not complicated things at all, especcially when faced with what shes up against, and it won't hurt you to pitch in here and there and trust me-life will be easier! Its great that you are giving her freedom to have what she wants, but you have a few things to cover here too, and for your own sake and for the sake of your future marriage, HELP!
2007-01-03 13:11:18 · answer #2 · answered by ASH 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yes, it is wrong. First, it isn't just her day, it is a day for BOTH of you. I can understand not wanting to get involved with flowers and decorations, most men don't care about that. I can speak from experience, planning a wedding can be very stressful. Don't make her go through that alone. As boring as it may be to you, if she ask to help her pick out flowers, go with her. It will help relieve some of the stress she is feeling and will make her SO happy with you, that you are taking the time to help her plan.
2007-01-03 11:18:18 · answer #3 · answered by Brian and Kari 2 · 4⤊ 0⤋
Here is the trick, Your about to get married, as you say it is her day. Weddings for some reason seem to be hugely important to woman, I like you could not have cared less about the actual wedding. However it is important to her and as her future husband, you should at least feign interest to show support.
You don't have to get all into it, but if she goes looking for cakes or flowers or stupid napkins you'll get points for just trying.
In your marriage there are going to be things that you care about that she does not, would you want her to completely dismiss you when ever you brought up what ever it is you care about. I doubt it
Just play along it will help and know that no matter how hard you try, even if you wanted to try, you'll never understand why women care about their wedding so much.
2007-01-03 11:17:29 · answer #4 · answered by Jerry 3 · 3⤊ 0⤋
It is wrong because she will need to know your input in all of this. I realise that guys like to take a step back when it comes to weddings but if you don't help it will upset her and she will think that you don't care. It is the special day for both of you. Why don't you ask her if there is a specific think that you can arrange like the honeymoon and you can make sure that she doesn't have anything to do with that part as it will all be down to you
2007-01-03 11:11:15 · answer #5 · answered by Baps . 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
No actually you should never lift a finger to help her, and when she blows up on you like a atomic bomb for being a lazy sob then you can wonder where you went wrong.
If you are not at least intrested in hearing your fiance's options then don't get married, there will be harder choices to make after the day is over.
2007-01-03 12:49:52 · answer #6 · answered by Shadow Kat 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
If she WANTS you to help, then YES. It is wrong. You are right that it is HER day. So if she wants you to help plan, then that is what you should do for the very reason that you put forth. If you are not willing to compromise on something like this, then she can probably do better for a spouse. You are potentially getting off on the wrong foot.
That said, if she doesn't care... then it is absolutely fine! All the power to both of you. Good luck and congratulations!
2007-01-03 11:11:37 · answer #7 · answered by Mr. Taco 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Its not nessecarily wrong but it is not just her day your getting married to each other so it is a special day for both of you. I think it would be a good idea if you helped plan some of it. it should be a time for you guys to bond some more too. put both of your likes and dislikes together and plan a really awesome wedding.
2007-01-03 12:08:36 · answer #8 · answered by babybg_one 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
What a way to start your lives together... "by chooisng not to help or have input when your needed for a very important event ".
Duh!!!! Yes, that is wrong and Yes...you should help... It's about both of you... not just her. Help in the areas where you can or where you feel the most comfortable in helping. Not saying you should pick out the bridesmaids dresses, flowers or table decor, other girlie stuff (obviously, unless she truly truly asks for your input in that area)..... but you can and should have some input in other areas like....the type of limo you'd like to drive in or, the type of food you'd like to eat, or what kind of tuxedos you and the guys would like to wear, and maybe the type of band/DJ and music etc. Volunteer to help with seating arrangements, mailing out invitations figuring out the type of thank you gifts for guests...
You're lives will "in the future" be about making decisions together... not apart. Please try and get off to good headstart with the right attitude by working together from the very beginning.
Alrighty then... go work that out.
2007-01-03 11:24:34 · answer #9 · answered by 247 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think that is Sweet, but maybe that's not all she wants.
She wants to Plan it, but she wants u to help doing the work.
I planned most of our wedding, my Husband helped me a LOT, with getting everything on place, helping me choose the right invitations, he also helped writing them out and sending....
He drove me if needed, and even let me borrow his car. He even went to pick up the flowergirl dresses and so on...
Then as a gift, I let him choose the transportation vehicle, he LOVES everythink on wheels.
So we had a white Semi, he had also decorated pretty nice!
I think u see my point, good luck. And make sure she has the day of her dreams. Congratulations and best of Luck!
2007-01-03 12:36:23 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋