I've just broken up with my g/f of three years. During this time I've fallen out of touch with my friends as she never seems to get on with them (especially female ones), I've found that we always spent time with her friends and family instead of mine even though as a doctor I hardly have any free time. Ironically I find myself having spent more money on her than vice versa 'as I earn more money'. I'm not asking if this relationship was right but how much other people have put up in relationships too. I'm just suprised I stayed with her and her insecurities for so long.
2007-01-02 23:17:13 · 16 answers · asked by interpol 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
I hope you find someone who appreciates you next time.
2007-01-02 23:21:08 · answer #1 · answered by vzhnri 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
A relationship can be anything. If you're asking what a fair relationship is, then the answer is a fair relationship is a fantasy. Compromise is the largest part of a relationship. While everyone ideally would give up nothing to have that perfect relationship, we do not live in an ideal world.
Working in a hospital is tough. Every department has to be on the top of their game with very little room for error. When you get home all you want is consistency and a drama free life. It sounds like you stayed with her because you knew what to expect.
If you like buying her things or offered to buy her things then don't be mad. But in the future, remember that if she isn't willing to do things for you, like making sure to try to get along with your friends and spending time with your family, then that's not fair at all and is not a relationship you should be in.
If you're asking what other people put up with, I've never received a birthday, christmas, valentine's day, anniversery present from a boyfriend. My last great love rarely hung out with my friends, family, or coworkers. The last time I went on a first date, I paid. Not every girl needs gifts, but I'd rather be single than stay with people who have no ambition and no interest in making me feel important or special or happy. Hopefully, you'll find someone who wants to do just as much as you have shown you will do for someone.
Good luck to you!
2007-01-03 07:31:16 · answer #2 · answered by drutheta 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I was in the same situation, the more time you spend with you gf the more it becomes habit, you begin to change and adapt to each other rather than being the same person you were when you first met, the same person she liked in the first place. Neglecting your friends is like a side effect even if you never mean to. Use this as a chance to make amends with your friends, if they are true friends they will welcome you back.
Go and meet new people, join new clubs go to new bars, have some time to think about what YOU want to do.
Onwards and Upwards mate, it gets easier as time goes on. Your ex will look at you in months to come and think 'why ever did i let you go?!'
Good luck and enjoy your self but try not to burn your bridges, obviously after such a long time you will still have and always will have a bond with your ex. Just remember a good relationship is give and take and you need your own time and your own friends as does you partner who ever that may be in the future.
Oh and for god sake MAKE MORE TIME out of work before its too late!
Take care fella!
2007-01-03 07:31:53 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
You were definitely treated unfairly-and good for you getting out of the situation!
A good relationship should be 50/50-I'm not just talking financially,but what each person gives to the relationship. Respecting that each person needs their own time to spend with friends and family-or just relaxing on their own is extremely important,in my opinion. Making an effort to get to know friends and family of your partner is also really important-these people mean alot to your partner!
Best of luck finding someone who'll give you the love and respect you deserve!
2007-01-03 07:31:01 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
They way she treated you wasn't 'fair'! Being 'fair' basically means everything equal. I was sort of in the same boat. Ive never visited friends and he wont let me visit family but whenever it suits him he'll see his mates. Its like because Im main carer of the children he thinks he can go out any time he wants and I cant. Obviously your relationship didnt go right and it was bound to happen but at least youve learned for your next relationship that everythings shared equal until it gets serious and trust her. Never let a woman walk over you. there here to satisfy men not the other way round!!
2007-01-03 07:27:50 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I dont think that there is a measure of "fairness." You obviously felt very strongly for her during a specific time period...Don't dwell on the past. I'm sure you have great memories of the two of you but she just wasnt the one for you and thats fine too!
Good luck to you!
2007-01-03 07:25:41 · answer #6 · answered by dawson190154 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
no that was not a fair relationship. everything you shared and done should of been equal everyone say that it's 50% - 50% when it really is 100%- 100% she should of been as interested in things and people you care about as you were for the ones she knew. no she was a selfish lady
2007-01-03 07:24:06 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Clever man..... You have just woken up....Women view us men as walking wallets...... And try to manipulate us and control, our behaviour....
You need to see your friends and get your self a prettier girl friend .... there is nothing better than seeing the expression on your ex's face as you kiss an absolute stunner ...... Dont get mad get even.... Spend more money .... on yourself.... Buy a nice new car... redecorate your house.....
Good luck ...... And have fun
2007-01-03 07:25:30 · answer #8 · answered by Fox Hunter 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
my bfrend just dumped me coz he feels hes seen to much of me this week usually inly see each oher 2days. i spent loads on him its one sided its the first time he has been in a mood with me yet hes just walked away coz the arguement got blown out of proportion im sat crying and he probly odesnt give a dam. Why are people so selfish !!!!! your ok u relise u dont want her i still want my bfriend to come back ha
2007-01-03 07:24:24 · answer #9 · answered by dinky 1 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Not all women are like this and at least you can see the problems your relationship experienced... Learn from these experiences and move forwards with your life
2007-01-03 07:30:13 · answer #10 · answered by weiss 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You are a nice guy, at least you know now and next time, put your cards at the table because relationships its a gamble.
2007-01-03 07:27:15 · answer #11 · answered by slowyloo7 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋