Is there something I'm missing?

Question

There's this girl that's very special to me. She graduated last year and I'm a senior this year. I really enjoy being around this person, but I can't bring myself to ask her straight out to go on a real date and actually start dating. I don't want one question ruin what we have now, but I'm at the point where I need to know.

I really can't tell if she's into me in that way or not. We text each other all the time, she's asked me to hang out with her and her other friend, and other little 'possible hints', and the thing is I cant differ them from just friends or actual hints. I invited her to play Tennis with me and all we managed to do was play Tennis for a couple of minutes and then sat on the court for hours talking. We also hang out all the time. I have a feeling that there is something there, but then I get the feeling that she isn't interested in an relationship right now.

Any thoughts on the subject would be appreciated. Thanks

Answer 1

Why are you asking us this question? The person you should be asking is her. Despite what you might have seen in the movies, people simply don't telepathically connect without first getting the subject out there by saying something. Don't just sit there. If you're already talking for hours, you might as well talk about something that is on your mind.

It's simple: In the middle of one of your friendly chats, stop, look into her eyes a moment, then look away. Don't say anything for a moment or two. Let her wonder what's going on in there, be a little mysterious. If she looks curious, continue by looking like you're trying to make a decision on something for a second, as if you don't want the question to hurt what you have going here (which is true). Then come out and just ask her, kind of quietly, cool, but not "acting" cool... ask her if she ever thought of you in a way that was, well, more than just a friend? Not that it would be a problem either way, it's just that you realized these times together were the high point of your life lately (or whatever seems appropriate to your situation while being complimentary to her)... Get the subject out there a little, then shut up and listen. Only respond to help understand how she feels. As long as she feels like you are actually, sincerely listening to her and ready to understand, no matter which way the answer is liable to go, will she really open up to you on this. And either way she responds, make sure you tell her sincerely it's fine, that you just wanted to know.

Hints are useless. Sincere honesty and empathy is the most powerful tool to create progress in a relationship. Patience is good, too, but if you just sit there and hope she makes the first move, you'll be wishing you'd not wasted all that time when you finally do find out what's going on. (If the answer is No, then at least you'll know that either you need to focus elsewhere for something more, or you're in it for the long haul).

Don't be timid, but don't be forceful. Be a friend, trying to be more of a friend. Honesty never fails.

Answer 2

Last 2 answers were good, it's good to be positive but also wary of reality...now you said she graduated last year....now since you do know her, so if she's going to college, you're gonna have to get this out of her...."Is she willing to make it a relationship when she's embarking the next big step to life?" Cause you're still in high school, yea you may be a senior, but if you plan on goin to college yourself and it happens to be a different college then you got mad issues to deal with, and honestly i doubt it'd work goin that route.

Most people i find who graduate high school and take the college route alot of times let go of high school relationships because they're 'starting a new life' or they need to go out and 'find themselves' so to speak....while only on occasion have there been high school sweethearts who stay together until the end.

So take the other advise given, GO FOR IT..better to know you had a chance then to continue to say if you 'could have' all your life and in essence you DID have that chance. BUT, if you do get together, be ready for what life's curveball may offer, cause if she has goals and it's college, and so do you...then the success of that relationship relies on the faith and devotion you have for each other....otherwise to each their own man, you can't be mad at her for wanting to live her life with the freedom from 'high school' so you'll just have to move on yourself.

GOOD LUCK MAN, go get her and live a memory worth reminiscing :)

Answer 3

you wont know ..if you dont ask...
dont be too shy.. cross that boundary..
she will either say yes..or no...
most times ..yes.... go from there...
see where the domino's fall into place from there..!!
good luck... "ask the Lady...out for italain food ...candle lit dinner..
movie ... stroll some where nice on a full moon... and start
chatting for hour's on end ..again..mmm

Answer 4

Just hang out with her more and eventually you are going to find out exactly where you two stand. Hopefully it will turn out like you want it to. Good luck...