Im considering this type of thing. He's my best friends brother and im in good with the fam and everything...he just has ex drama and I don't want to get into a relationship just yet.
2007-01-02 15:00:11 · 29 answers · asked by B 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
ummm no not a good idea
2007-01-02 15:02:06 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Overall I think Friends with benefits is not a bad thing as long as both of you are clear that that is all it will be. Often people will get into these situations claiming that is all it is when in fact they are hoping for more and that always leads to a mess in the end.
You say you don't want to get into a relationship"just yet" do you mean with him or at all? If it is with him then I would not sleep with him while he is still dealing with the drama from his ex. That is not the optimum start for you. If you do want to be with him then I would wait and be his friend while he is going through this and then perhaps things will develop naturally for the two of you.
If you just don't want a relationship at all but just want a body to be close to then he may be a safe choice. Just make sure your boundaries are clear. You don't want things to be awkward at your best friends house for you. I would also make sure your best friend is alright with your getting together with her brother. Just respect your friend, her brother and yourself and you can do no wrong.
Good luck
2007-01-02 15:12:40 · answer #2 · answered by Joy 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I can sit here and say go for but because he has ex-drama maybe its not the best thing to do. Plus I have had a few friends with benefits and yeah its fun and everything but there are always a few that become super clingy and annoying so just think it through very carefully because what ever your decision it will after your friendship with your best friend also!!
2007-01-02 15:05:21 · answer #3 · answered by cHiKiBaBe 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The problem with being friends with benefits is that you aren't being a friend, and you aren't getting the benefits you think. All that you have is two people who agree to use each other. This type of arrangement is especially common on college campuses, where dating is almost extinct.
One reason why the whole idea of courting a woman in college is almost non-existent is because if a man can receive all the physical benefits of marriage without even so much as knowing a girl's last name, don't expect him to pop the question anytime soon (much less woo you with real romance). This is why prostitutes never work near college campuses. They would go out of business, because it's free at the parties. You just give a girl a beer, tell her she's pretty, and the hook-up begins.
But no woman on earth is longing for a whole series of meaningless hook-ups and physical encounters with uncommitted men. They're looking for love, intimacy, and acceptance. But they may be willing to give away their bodies if it can make them feel desired, wanted, and cared for. I remember receiving an e-mail from a girl who said she had given oral sex to a number of guys because she wanted to be respected. I'm sure the guys appreciated her efforts, but not a single one gained respect for her. It's like putting your money in a paper shredder so that you can have more cash.
My words have been so harsh against "friends with benefits" because we have been created to participate in a love so much greater than all of this. When a man and a woman really love each other, their love becomes a reflection of the very inner life of the Trinity. Pope John Paul II says that in their bodies, they make visible the invisible mystery of God. . . that he is love! When a man loves a woman, he can see in her what Adam originally saw in Eve. He can see God's image and likeness in her. This should inspire a man to have a trembling reverence for the body of a woman, this tabernacle of life, this temple of the Holy Spirit.
Odds are, you aren't going to hear this vision of sex and love on MTV, or in some Abercrombie and Filth catalogue. But, you know where you'll find it? It's stamped into your very heart, and into your very body. There's this desire in all of us to make a total gift of ourselves. When it comes to friends with benefits, it's the opposite of what every one of us is made for. Instead of a total gift, it's a partial loan. That's why neither partner ends up satisfied. They aren't giving themselves. They're losing themselves. In the words of Pope John Paul II, when two people agree to use each other, they become "slaves to their weaknesses."
2007-01-02 15:04:07 · answer #4 · answered by kakolikapiha 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you're in with the fam, etc, you can't have friends with benefits here. Friends with benefits only works if you're really not interested in the person on anything but a physical level. Otherwise you get wrapped up.
2007-01-02 15:02:29 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
BAD idea. Friends with benefits works for a little while, but then (usually the girl) someone starts to develop feelings for the other. Usually, the other person does not return the feelings and someone almost always gets hurt. You should find yourself a guy who wants to be with only you. =)
2016-05-22 21:43:26 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
It can be good but with the right person HOWEVER you need watch out for the falling for each other part b/c the benefits part created that stronger emotional attachement you just have to mature about b/c remember you are just friends. Friends are still going to fall for someone else.
2007-01-02 15:02:34 · answer #7 · answered by Miss L 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
No. what if you get knocked up? Then you've got a friend and a kid. Do you not like this person enough to be a boyfriend? Geese girl if not find another! Where is the passion in "friends with benefits"? Also, if I am your boyfriend later, I do not want this 'friend' around. I will make him no longer your 'friend' or I will leave, lest it make me sick to think about.
2007-01-02 15:03:54 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well being friends with benfit can be good or bad. Good scenario is that yall actually benefit each other and yall end up together.Bad scenario is that yall dont end up together and you have an emotional attachment to him. But in any case make sure your the only one he is messing wit and use protection.
2007-01-02 15:06:06 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you want a relationship eventually with him I would not suggest the friends with benefits thing first. Men have a very hard time Switching you back to a possible relationship. Pretty much once they think of you as a vessel for their sperm it's hard for them to think of you as a vessel for their love.
2007-01-02 15:03:11 · answer #10 · answered by Songbird 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i would say a little bit of both, u have ur disadavantages and ur advantages. lets say u broke up, not saying anyting that you will, things could be a lil weird between u 2. but if u do go out, u would already know a lot about each other and if things r gunna work out or not. also, things would go smoothly cuz u can be urself like ur were when u were friendz.
2007-01-02 15:07:10 · answer #11 · answered by dementor012 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋