i am wondering if it would be a wise decision to commit my mother to a institution?

Question

i know this sounds like a funny question, but my mother is bipolar and pushes everyone out of her life, whether she means to or not. i am sad to say that i have finally had enough. i'm afraid she will hurt herself if she loses the last person that she cares about. i believe she needs help, but i can't do it. this is the only solution that i can think of, a very sad solution. what should i do?

thank you all for your answers they are very helpful. one of the questions asked about meds and i think she has them, but unfortunately she also has a meth problem. i don't live with her, infact i live one state away. she only moved back to our home town a year ago, and already it has proven a wise decision that i haven't moved back too. i believe she is a beautiful soul and will do fine if she is given the right counsel. once again thank you for your help.

Answer 1

Sometimes its the only thing left to do. We had my grandfather move in with us after numerous strokes, It seamed like a good idea. But he was just to far gone and after nights of babysitting him and constant stress on everyone we had to move him into a home.

Answer 2

Is she competent? From my knowledge of working at a hospital, a person cannot be committed unless they have be official been deemed up able to make decision based on mental and or physical capability. ( Very sad in cases were the patients doesn't want to be resesitated or even take there meds and the family can do nothing)

I would suggest an Adult Assisted Living facility that perferably specializes in drug problems. A friend of mines works at one. The patients are treated like adult only there's always a "mom" or "dad" on guard to help make decisons. They are taught how to manage money, perform daily activities, etc. They have cerfews, phone privialges. Kinda like an adult dormatory.

I have a cousin that I SERIOUSLY believe has some sort of mental problems. The family doc has agreed with us( we've know him 25+years), but the only way we can force her to get help is if she is temporally unable to make decisons (ex: car accident) and we permanantly take over, or if the person is having harmful thoughts.

So.....

Maybe start with an Adut home first, maybe there she can be amongst people like her and maybe control her condition with therapy+med, constant supervision etc.

If she runs away for violates the rules of the home( bring in drugs), an institution may be best.

Good luck

Answer 3

Can you legally do that if she hasn't already " tried " to hurt herself? I understand how bad it may be, but I think that maybe you should look into some kind of intervention with her family/friends first. No mistake-you will be the bad guy no matter what you do, but just the fact that you're trying should be commended. Talk to a psychologist. Perhaps they can give you some insight, coping methods (for her & you!) and also other options. You sound very frustrated. Keep trying to find a solution. At least if you keep looking for a remedy the frustration won't consume you. Good luck & God Bless.

Answer 4

You don't have to commit her to a mental institution. You could either do one of two other options You could if you can afford it spend about 8-10 dollars a hour a few hours a day for a home health aid to come in and make sure she takes her meds and everything.or you could if you cant afford that the state will pay for her to receive regular care in a nursing home faculty where there would be nurses on call 24/7 to make sure everything she needed was taken care of plus she could after she got back on her meds and was reasonably sane and all she could work for the nursing home and make some spending money I don't know about that last part it all depends on their policy on residents working.

Answer 5

It is an aukward question but good for this site since you will get a variety of answers. I believe you should think in the best interest for your MOTHER, not yourself or anyone else in the family. Think about what your mother would do about a situation like this before her illness- what do you think her opinion would be, also-medical facilities who foster people like your mother are trained and ready to handle any problem or questions you may have. In my opinion you should do a little research and hear what institutions have to offer for your mother, good luck-alex

Answer 6

DO IT! You can not spend *your* life taking care of her, and you are not the type of specialist she needs. I have witnessed a few bipolar people and it is extremely difficult for them to deal with. Understand she will probably not want to go, but right now she is not in a position to make that decision. Obviously this is much to serious of a matter to leave to either her or an unqualified person. For her sake and for your sake, let her go to a place where she can recover (and hopefully get better with medication and therapy) and you can persue the rest of your life. I really hope everything works out :)

Answer 7

Everyone needs help from time to time. Well, you just asking the question means you need help. Never be afraid to ask for help. Your mother can't do it because she is in no mental frame to do it. My suggest to you? Remind yourself you are no Psychologist or any person in the medical field that can help your mom. The only thing you can do is be there for her and direct her in the way you think your right frame of mind should put her. She is in no right frame of mind to think for herself. Bipolars are known for suicidal tendancy, so I completely understand your dilemma. This is not like a cold dear you can just put a wash clothe over her temples and some aspirin to make her feel better. You have to let go of being the "care taker" mode because this is more then you can handle. EVEN IF YOU HAVE TO GO TO EXTREMES GET YOUR MOM HELP. I have experience dear. I took care of someone who was bipolar who I cared for deeply, who eventually took his life. Don't be one of those I wish i could of should of people. GO TO THE EXTREMES without making mom feel like she is a burden. Don't forget you are only human to. YES, YOU CAN ONLY TAKE SO MUCH. Since mom is able at time yet unable to make clear choices. Its your turn. SHE NEEDS HELP THAT YOU ARE UNABLE TO GIVE AND STOP BEING AN ENABLER LET THE PROFESSIONALS TO THIER JOB AND NEVER LET HER MAKE YOU FEEL GUILTY OF THE HELP YOU ARE GIVING HER AND NEVER LET HER QUIT THE HELP SHE IS GETTIING........... EVER. YOU LIKE YOUR MOM ARE JUST HUMAN. YOU ARE HEALTHY MOM IS NOT. GET HER SOMEWHERE AND FORCE HER TO STAY NO MATTER WHAT SHE DOES OR SAYS. DO NOT FALL FOR THE CRYING AND THE BEGGING SHE MAY GIVE TO GET HER OUT. MAKE HER STAY.

Answer 8

Unless your mother is declared incompitent you cannot commit her to an institutuion without her consent. Since she is her own person she cannot be committed against her will unless the police decide she is a danger to herself or other and then the institution can only hold her for 72 hours.

Answer 9

I would speak with her doctor or one of your own. She could live for another 20 years or more and use up your life.

While I thoroughly believe we are responsible for our parents when they become older, when a parent needs outside help, you have to bite the bullet for her and for yourself.

She would likely be better off in a facility that can take care of her. You must make plans to visit often, though.

Answer 10

Your mother cannot be committed to an institution unless she is a serious, life-threatening danger to herself or to others. I'm sorry. The best solution for you is to get counseling for yourself to deal with your situation as best as possible.