It has become a problem, what are some suggestions as a consequence ?? He may be removed fro m preschool. Is spanking suggested?
2007-01-02 13:05:35 · 13 answers · asked by sofora k 2 in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Toddler & Preschooler
Spank him or bite him back.
2007-01-02 13:07:06 · answer #1 · answered by HELL ON WHEELS 2 · 1⤊ 2⤋
Please do not bite the child back. They do not associate it with the action they just think that Mommy or Daddy hurt me! The best thing is to not give it any extra attention. Immediate time out is a good idea. Isolate the child. You should have a very specific spot, away from the TV and any other family activity where the child has to go when they misbehave. Set a timer so that you are not the bad guy the timer is. It is just a consequence of an action NOT of you being angry.
Also try to remember that as a toddler they do not have the words to express their feelings of frustration so it is up to the adults to teach them alternative ways of dealing with conflict. You can start by trying to diffuse a situation before it even gets started.
Good luck to you!
Good luck to you.
2007-01-02 21:17:42 · answer #2 · answered by barksabit 6 · 2⤊ 0⤋
My toddler does the same at daycare, and spoke to my pediatrician about it. He confirmed that this behavior is caused by not being able to deal with frustration. He recommends to simply remove the child from the situation that is frustrating them. Simply saying "no biting" in a firm voice, but NOT biting back, or any other form of yelling, spanking, etc. Also, to identify when the toddler is biting, in order to avoid these situations to begin with. This is only a phase, and will go away before you know it. Hang in there!
2007-01-02 21:31:39 · answer #3 · answered by Kim S 1 · 2⤊ 0⤋
I would spank the child. I would not bite back, because you are saying its ok. Mommy did it why can't I? Spanking will get his attention. It says ''if you spare the rod, you will spoil the child''.
One more thing, do not spank your child with your hand or when you are angry, do it with a paddle or belt. The reason I say that is because, if you do it with your hand, they will fear you. You don't want to push your child away from you. I hope you can understand that.If you are doing it with a object, they direct there anger/fear toward that . I'm not saying, beat the child. I pretty sure someone will take it that way. And if you are one of the ones that believe in spankings, you will understand what I am saying. Sometimes it takes this to get there attention.
Its really depends in what you believe . Everyone one will have an opinion, but it comes down to you as the parent to decide
2007-01-03 12:20:00 · answer #4 · answered by poohbear_cmw 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Sorry to hear what must be a tough & pretty upsetting problem for you all. I could make some practical suggestions (gumshields), I'd say first don't be too upset by it yourselves. You know they'll grow out of it. Sure, it might work to gum them back hard! It'll teach them that it's not OK to pick on someone bigger. Most animals figure that out. But the human being in them might just feel that they are missing out if they don't get to go to preschool for a while.
A child that young can't talk or think their way out of feeling frustrated, and in a way it's great that they have the self esteem to feel that they can object as best they can to treatment they do feel wordlessly is unfair. What else can they do? Write a letter to Congress?
How did they feel when they prepared to bite, anyway? "Why" is a word they'd understand better. Let them speak or show you how it happened. If they deny it has happened, frightened by the reactions of bigger people, play along and ask how it might happen, or happen to someone of another invented name.
You could ask them if anything good or great happened that day also. It was only one incident in their day.
Their intention? To hurt as they had been hurt? How should they cope with that, overlook their own feelings instead of attacking? Their own problem isn't the biting, it's the fact that they felt so trapped that they couldn't see what else to do in that situation. Now they are going to miss out. Don't tell them that, though, maybe you might offer to take them out & after some days you could reply with that. If they ask You, if they say they miss other pre-schoolers, you could say "Well, you hurt them, scared them". No explaining, statement of fact, leave it there.
It's fairly important to hear them out silently, let them know that it's OK to tell you how angry/sad/lonely they are at being along and yet treated differently. Listen to them, and let them get a bit mad/sad/bad about it. They can safely be angry and be heard. Don't talk at them & interrupt, telling them what they should feel. If anything, hear them out & hug them, echo what they do back to them.
Whatever they can do to act it out - you can handle that. Listen to - or calmly watch - their anger, sadness, maybe mirror it, let them feel someone understands how hard it is to be them right now.
They won't always be without friends, littler than everyone else; they won't always be powerless or feel picked on. Try to get across to them that they can be open about negative feelings too, that snarling & biting is one way, but show them that you too can cry, be irritated, without biting. Act out how you're on their side, & not in words. You'll always have more words than they will - try acting so that they get it! They don't always have to smile & bluff & fake good humour to be liked : ) Celebrities are pretty lonely because they don't realise that - they go on trying to be perfect. People don't love each other for their perfection, you know! A perfect thing doesn't need love or feel it!
2007-01-02 22:11:51 · answer #5 · answered by WomanWhoReads 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
My daughter bit me before anyone else and yes-I bit her back. I didn't break the skin and the mark lasted about an hour. But she never, ever did it again. Most children bite, scream, hit, cry, push....because they are at a stage where they are feeling emotions and having a hard time expressing them. You have to help them to learn how to communicate their feelings.
2007-01-02 21:08:25 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 5⤊ 0⤋
our son has the same problem he was kicked out of the nusery for biting. he would bite anything and everything, so they put him in a playpen so he coul dnot hurt others and it seemed to work now he preferes to be in their, i do not know how old you son is but ours is 2. he also has some other issues going on.
2007-01-03 13:59:53 · answer #7 · answered by Dana C 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I dont believe in spanking children can be disciplined without be physically harmed, taking thing away is a good way to discipline
2007-01-02 21:11:35 · answer #8 · answered by gloria s 1 · 1⤊ 1⤋
I spray in my children's mouth with a bottle of lemon juice if they bite (or use bad language). They don't do it more than two or three times before they learn.
2007-01-02 21:42:57 · answer #9 · answered by toomanycommercials 5 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Bite her back to get her to realize how much it hurts...it really works but believe me you will feel bad about it a first but then when they dont ever do it again you will be fine...good luck
2007-01-02 21:12:34 · answer #10 · answered by east 1 · 2⤊ 1⤋
Bite him back. Not hard enough to draw blood or anything, but hard enough so he gets the point. Those tiny teeth hurt.
2007-01-02 21:07:50 · answer #11 · answered by Luann 5 · 5⤊ 1⤋