Best way to deal with the middle-aged, insecure, manipulative, back-stabbing co-worker?

Question

When confronted this person masters turning the table and tries to make you look like the trouble-maker who thrives on controversy. Hoping for suggestions (outside the office to avoid in office discussion - I'm not a water cooler whisperer). You can only pretend and "kill'em with kindness" for so long.......

Answer 1

make him some tasty thumb tack muffins and some antifreeze koolaid that should deal with that

Answer 2

They are called Serial Bullies. and they are a form of sociopath. and when confronted with this they will really try to get even. look up serial bullies on yahoo search. you will understand this person but they will always choose their victims esp.if the person shows vulnerability.(when you're down the dogs chew you up-the more you scream the harder they dig in) serial bullies.sociopaths in the office.check it out.yahoo search. also check out the movie Basic Instinct 2
either change jobs or take acting lessons.they are the hunter and you are their prey.they are sociopaths and you are showing weakness to them.stay away from them.talk as little as possible.and never trust them.
do not mix with the other office personel.keep your personal life very private from everyone there.this person will win everyone over.They are writing the script. Watch the movie Basic Instinct 2 with sharon stone-it is incredible and is exactly what you are talking about.
Don't be so friiendly in your workplace.Be private and start working out at a gym-it will give you strength and focus. They might look elsewhere for a victim if you don't fit the bill anymore.
(keep a journal-at home)

Answer 3

Be silent, and watch everything that they do. They are teaching you how to get ahead in their world. Usually this person knows every trick in the book when it comes to casting someone in the worse light possible. Do not engage. But, do not be kind, either. Kindness does not work with this type of trouble-maker, but be forewarned, if you engage this person in combat, they will always win.

Find out which of the other co-workers is blabbing your secrets to this person, that is if you are not wise enough to keep your mouth shut about your private life. This is how this kind of person finds out about ammo to fire at you in public. Don't play their game. When they ask you why you won't say anything anymore, just tell them that you are enjoying watching a master at work. Don't say what kind of master!
Above all, remember, DO NOT ENGAGE no matter what they say or do. Their words have no power unless you engage.

Answer 4

The best way to get a person to listen to you is with words. Write a letter to this person, give a couple of scenarios and the out comes to this person. Tell them that if this doesn't stop that you will be taking it a step further because you are tired of looking like the bad person.

Answer 5

You might not want to but the key to getting someone off your back like that is to stoop to thier level and outplay them at their own game. Kindness will not work with such a person they will only take advantage of it. When he/she makes a mistake your there to not only point it out but bring it to attention. You have to confront those type of people directly, when you make a mistake you have to be ready to argue your point with good reasoning and remember to pick your battles wisely you can't win them all but the right victories will put the true troublemaker into their place.

Answer 6

Always take the high road! Be a constant positive to their negative. True colors will always come out & you will look like the prize if you keep yourseld clear & out of controversy. It's hard but in the end you will have done the right thing and you will feel great about it!.

Answer 7

you do no longer would desire to respond to to her. She's no longer your boss and would not sign your paycheck. the superb answer isn't any answer, and the less you tell her, the extra useful. do no longer even ask her what she's engaged on. Zone Her Out. have faith me: absolutely everyone who hides their paintings is doing something devious, or doing something against enterprise coverage, or the two. I worked with somebody like her-comparable arrogent physique of ideas. She'd take care of her laptop on the section with a replica holder so as that no person would desire to work out what grew to become into on her demonstrate screen (she made specific she have been given a gap the place no person would desire to take a seat down at the back of her) because of the fact she surfed the internet all day, did no longer something and have been given away with it because of the fact she kissed up. i surely did no longer care, because of the fact my schedule grew to become into larger and lots extra useful - retirement. overlook approximately this dysfunctional. do no longer feed into her negativity. you will come out the extra useful individual. stable success

Answer 8

I agree with the person that suggested to try and get another job maybe in another department or better yet, with a different company, but on your last day make her some Ex-Lax brownies. You'll get the last laugh.

Answer 9

Try to move to another job within a different dept. possibly? At least the good news is if you're young and this person is middle aged they'll be retired before you and eventually it will stop! :-D

Answer 10

Ignore them, and go on as if they are non existent. It works for all kinds of ailment mentioned in your question.
Have a nice life and enjoy it every moment do not even care about all these small pin pricks ...good luck

Answer 11

I really believe that being kind can defuse a lot of potentially troublesome situations. I feel sorry for this person that causes him/her to be this way. Perhaps all they want is a little attention.