What do you do when you have NO SUPPORT from your family??

Question

Nothing I do EVER measures up to my family's expectations!Everything I have achieved has always been overseen by my family. Anything I have ever done equals to nothing. They don't see it. Since they don't see it, I don't want to do it. Whenever I went after my goals or dreams, I was laughed at.. So I stopped. My family thinks buying and paying for stuff is "supporting" their daughter. I want moral support. I never get it. I never did...

I am so lonely. There is no one to keep me motivated, no one to support me or help me with anything. WheneverI have a dream, I don't have someone there to believe in me. I am 17. Filling out college applications are a dread. Especially FAFSA. My family is always yelling and they don't want to help me fill out the applications. They think I should do everything on my own. If I go to them for advice, they say "You are old enough.If you want to do something, YOU have to do it."

Please help...

Answer 1

What I would suggest to do is just really move out and get away from this emotional abuse, you dont need it, find a roomate and move out, if they dont believe in you dont let it bother you, as long as you believe in yourself you will get far. Start dating and find that person who will support you and who you can talk to about this, I'm sure you will, My husband was like this from his family, and I built him up with such confidence that his family started getting jealous, and now they started fighting for time with him because of his success, of course when that time happens still love them because they are your family, but always throw it that you did it by yourself because noone else would. I hope that you excel in whatever it is you do. Fill out those papers, if anything its only jealousy over what you have accompished so far. Good luck

Answer 2

Well, I am really sorry to hear that you are having such a hard time with your family. You would want them to be a strong support to you especially now of course.

I can only tell you what I have beent through and maybe it will help. It is hard though.

My parents were both very abusive. Needless to say, they also did not support us emotionally in anyway whatsoever. My mother and father both ended up dying. One when I was 16, and the other a few year later after we'd been out of touch many years anyway. So, I raised myself. Even when they were alive, I raised myself. I often asked God why i was even born and why my parents hated us so much. It was really, really hard.

Now that I am much older, I can be very proud of the strong woman I have become. Because I had to learn to do everything myself, it really made me very capable. I put myself through College and I too, had to go through the whole FAFSA paperwok which was grueling. There are so many other lessons and trials along the way.

Please know that even though your parents may never truly be what you hope for, you do have the power to care for yourslef anf figure these things out. Yes, it seems unfair, but you can do it. Stop expecting this support from them and you will release the anger and hurt you feel from not getting it. Who knows, they may even "come around" once they realize you are alright without thier help.

I now have a son and I will also say that because of the lack of love and support my parents showed me, I've made sure to give my son as much as possible. I feared I wouldn't be able to because I never had it as a child. However, he is SO loved and adored and I just hope I will always let him know/feel that.

Stay strong and don't lose your hope. You will make it.

Answer 3

Dont look to these losers for support. Look to YOU because in the end that is all you can really count on. NEVER stop reaching towards your goals just because your not supported. Take hold of your situation and make the best of it. Go to your guidance counselor for help with fafsa but you will need your parents last years income tax papers to complete. Keep your head up and you will be fine.

Answer 4

I'll help you out.... they'll realize too late that a daughter is a precious thing, not a liability. Their loss.

Email me and I'll help you get through the FAFSA and the college aps, I know it's a pain.. :) (2 kids in college, another one who's a junior, so here we go again!)

I left home at 17 and never looked back. My mother didn't realize until on her death bed that she made a huge mistake. You can't change them, you can only do what is right for you. Luv, Suz
[e-mail]

Answer 5

self confidance never come to anyone on a plate, self confidance comes by trying. what we have to remember is our parents are the product of their own upbringing and maybe they did not have the support and do not know any different.
If you cannot get the help from them go to an older student or carreeers advisor. you can tell them what your family are like.
I never got praise or encouragement, you have to give yourself encouragment tell yourself you can do it, ask advistors at the college. Go to the national assocation for sefl esteem its on the net, do their quiz, it will really boost our slef esteem.
i am afraid you will just have to give up looking to your family for support if they wont give it and look elsewhere the more you achieve the more confidant you will feel, You will do well, its scary but dont, let fears control you, read joyce meyers the Confidant woman www.joycemeyers.org she is brilliant and approval addiction she writes about not needing otherws approval to get on in life being free of it. You are doing great going to college and that.

Answer 6

because they don't see it that doesn't mean that you give up this is not the time to give up because one day you will look back and see the things you have accomplished without their support.this is something you need to do for you it's about what you want and what you want to do and once you become grown your life will not be based on your moms accomplishments or dads, but of your own yes they do play a big part in raising you ,taking care of you and should be supportive but you becoming a woman got to do whats best for you and your future. thats why you see so many teens droping out of school and having kids because of unsupportive families. teens like me and you need support and motivation to go on in life. besides when your family see you supporting your dreams and setting your goals then they will see whos laughing then!
if you need someone to talk to e-mail me at [e-mail],i am also 17.
e-mail me and god bless!

Answer 7

You re 17....you can't change them......however you can look out for yourself.
Don't stop doing things just because they don't pay attention.
do things for yourself.....look in that mirror and say I COUNT! I CAN DO IT! I WILL DO IT AND I WILL DO IT FOR ME!
Does it make you feel good.>>your accomplishments...you're now old enough to know what you like and don't. I tell myself all the time...I count and does it really matter if I don't believe in me who will.......every day is a new day.
As far as your applications go to your school counselor, get help that way. You have dreams of college GO FOR IT!
and
you know you will be a better person ...because you have learned from your life.

Have Faith in yourself.....
Make 2007 a year of Dreams and New Beginnings!
Girl Go For It!

Best wishes

Answer 8

I have been in your shoes kiddo, and I can honestly say I know how you feel. My best suggestion, go to your school counselor and ask for help on filling out the FASFA form yourself. I think it is awesome you are going to do something with yourself and go onto college, may you be able to do all you set out to do kiddo! My prayers are with you! If possible, can you find a good youth group to be a part of, with a church maybe? I know you will find mentors and good listeners there. Prayers!

Answer 9

Welcome! I have been in the same situation for about 16 yrs. I just finally said f*** it and went my own way and did my own thing. I am 33 and Now, THEY come to ME for support, THEY come to ME for help.Even though they were'nt there for me, I never turned them away but I always let them know that if they want something or need help they have to work for it or figure it out themselves because I will not always be here. I'm loving it!
If I could help you I honestly would.

Answer 10

I don't know what to tell you. I'm 28 years old and my Family is still like that towards me. All I can say is keep doing what your doing. If your making yourself happy, I'll be happy! Theres not much else to do.

One day someone will fall in love with you. And with everything you've done up to that point is all about you, no one else can take that credit!