I will be 20 this year and all my life I've never really felt that I've done anything for myself at all. I'm always saved, or overprotected, or kept out of trouble, and not a chance to make my own mistakes OR get things right on my own.
It makes me feel like I will never learn because my parents are in the way. They tell me there must always be strict rules in life (aka. religion), that I have to be smart enough, and all those this-is-life-and-growing- up crap.
Well I feel stupid, that's for sure.
And this year I would like to go to Europe for a couple of weeks to experience Summer. I really need to breathe. I have a good friend over there who will be waiting for me. I told my parents once but they said no just because I'm a girl and they don't like it that I want to go on my own. But I need this and I will try again.
But this time I want to know how to tell them in a way that they listen to me. I need them to take me seriously this time.
Some help would be appreciated, thanks
2007-01-02 06:01:17 · 15 answers · asked by HollowTree 3 in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
p.s:
Yes I am paying for the trip, I plan to keep working till then, and this country I wish to visit is Germany.
I only dread what they keep saying, that bad things will happen if I go without their blessings, or that as long as I'm still not married they still have control over me.
Well, it's just a trip. I know how to take care of myself. And yes, what happens happens. It's not like I'm planning not to come back.
Anyway, thank you for all your answers. I will need as much courage as I could get.
2007-01-02 07:00:54 · update #1
I'm sure your parents love you very much & are just worried about your safety.
So seeing its your safety thats the problem with your parents
you need to convince them you will be very safe!
Get all the holiday information & share it with your parents so they feel better about the places you will visit, letting them know you are going no matter what
Don't argue with them as you need this trip to be a happy memory
so use words that wont upset them but staying firm at the same time
Happy Holiday & New Year for 2007
2007-01-02 09:33:10 · answer #1 · answered by ausblue 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Mom, dad, I just wanted to let you know that I am leaving May 2ND for Europe and I was wondering if you thought there was any must see places while I am over there.
Something like that should work just fine.
Don't waste your time arguing with them.
If you feel and need to argue just ask your parents if they feel like they have done such a bad job of raising you that you are not fit to go out of town without a chaperon.
2007-01-02 06:09:00 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
It sounds like your parents don't want to let go of their child. Unfortunately, I don't think it's possible to talk to them and make them hear you out because they've been doing this your entire life. It's probably hard for them to stop. Instead, show them what you mean. Their "no" about your trip to Europe is no longer mandatory because you're over 18. By going despite their disapproval you will have shown them that you're an adult now. It may hit them hard, but they need to see that they are not allowed to make decisions for you anymore. Plus, the trip will give you the independance you want. good luck!
2007-01-02 06:06:29 · answer #3 · answered by julka323 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋
You are of an age where your parents can no longer tell you what to do. However, if you are asking them to pay for your trip, they have the right to say no. If you are paying for the trip yourself, just let them know when you are leaving and assure them that you will check in with the Embassy wherever you go. Give them a copy of your itinerary and let them know where to reach you in case of an emergency.
Have a wonderful time and send them postcards!
2007-01-02 06:48:48 · answer #4 · answered by AnnieD 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I lived in Europe for 5 years. It all depends on what part of Europe you are going to. If you're going to Britan then its no big deal and your parents will realize that. If you are going to eastern europe; prague, budapest, warsaw, slovakia, ukraine then I would tell you not to go. Life is cheap there, no place for a young girl like yourself.
2007-01-02 06:06:08 · answer #5 · answered by doc4life29 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Bottom line...You are 20 years old. You can do what you wish.
Tell them that this is what you are going to do and you will send them post cards. When they start to disagree, remind them that you didn't ask for permission, you are merely being responsible and letting them know of your plans.
Good luck and be safe.
2007-01-02 06:10:41 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Are you paying for this trip? If so, then they have no right to interfere. You are an ADULT!!! Just go! Have fun! Stand up and tell then that you are an adult and you ARE going to go, whether they like it or not. The end.
2007-01-02 06:07:09 · answer #7 · answered by S. Elizabeth 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
wow,,,well... i would rlly take them aside one night and just started spilling out your decision-crying adds to the effect- and say that u are grown-up and responsible and they need to know that youll always love them and do your best to be the best person u can be but u need some time to figure out my life. then ask them if they ever needed/did this in their young life cuz they most likely did.
2007-01-02 06:06:48 · answer #8 · answered by dachshundgirl04 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Wow, it is merely like me!! i can absolutely relate. i attempted turning out to be veg final 3 hundred and sixty 5 days in spite of the undeniable fact that it did no longer paintings out. Now i attempted it lower back and that i've got been vegetarian for 3 months! ok, so it grew to become into hard with my mom, too. What you're able to desire to do is print a catalogue of issues with protein--nonetheless your mom will possibly no longer have reported it precisely, that's what she's in contact approximately--getting each and every of the burden loss application areas fulfilled healthily. do slightly examine and locate out what a stable vegetarian needs. when you have chanced in this out, approach your mom with a comfortable, clever physique of ideas. make specific to guarantee your mom which you're in uncomplicated terms turning out to be vegetarian for the animals' sake--no longer because of the fact which you're turning out to be hippie and smoking pot and having 7-foot hair! LOL. She needs to renowned the reason at the back of it, and the certainty which you're no longer likely to alter who you extremely are merely because of the fact your weight loss application is changing for the animals! if your mom remains irritating and disenchanted, tell her to start procuring unfastened variety meat--it is meat that helps the animals to have happier lives, and is plenty extra healthy. stable success! If i can do it, you're able to do it. Kate
2016-10-06 08:21:14 · answer #9 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
tell them that you would love to have their blessing to go but even without it you will go. get your passport, visa, and buy your ticket before telling them but dont tell them that you have just do it... this is so you dont get swayed dont get brushed aside...
listen to their concerns. hear what they have to say and tell them that you can hear they are worried for you.... tell them that you know how much they love you and care for you and that you love and care for them too.
oh it helps if you have an older brother or sister who will support you through this too... or perhaps another family member who agrees with you that you should go... get someone on your side before you tell your parents...
Best of luck and enjoy your trip....
2007-01-02 06:47:00 · answer #10 · answered by wollemi_pine_writer 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋