my boyfriend made some bad choices several years ago, and got a couple DUI's. 5 years later the courts still deney him his licence.
So, I must first say that everyone in a relationship need time away from each other, and I am his girlfriend not his mother, so it is not that I want to keep tabs on him, but...
here is what happened last night; We got up in the morning and i took him to work. He had just a short day, and got off at 4:00. So i did what I had to do during that time and awaited his call. I wanted to know what he was doing and if i needed to pick him up. So 4, 5 o'cloc rolls around...don't here from him...I am watching the rose bowl (by myself cause i didn't want to make plans with anyone in case i need to pick him up) and I wanted to drink some beers...but i held off just in case...so fianally i was like like, oh well he must have a ride...so i had 2 bbers at home and then went to the bar across the street to play pool and have a few more(cause i was bored as hell)
2007-01-02 05:24:50 · 18 answers · asked by ladyjno7 4 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
well about 15 min to 8 he calls me up... asks me what i am doing and if i want to come to his friends house...(about 20 min away) I was like, not really cause i have been drinking and I really just didn't want to... so he actually seemed a little tiffed with me. I thought about it after I hung up and thought...I bet he doesnt have a ride home... so i called him back and sure enough he didn't. (i did end up getting him BTW) My point is how can I tell him that I won't wait around for him to decide he want to hang out with me or needs a ride...I have a life too...and how can i ask him to keep me informed with out him thinking i am trying to keep tabs on him...I didn't call him and ask yesterday cause i want to give him space....help
2007-01-02 05:29:58 · update #1
Your boyfriend is in the position he's in because of his own stupid choices, and although we all reasonably expect our partners, family, and friends to support us during tough times, it seems as if you actually think you are obligated to be his chauffer without any boundaries. I don't think that's the case at all. The least he could do, with all the generousity and support you are showing him, is to make it as easy as possible for you to do that.
I would tell him exactly what you told us here, I mean, how you see the situation and why you are begining to feel resentful. Who cares whether or not he gets angry? Where's your backbone, girl? How dare he get angry? I would be furious if he did to me what he did to you.
So yeah, I would say to him what you said to us here, and at the end, I would say:
"Here's how it's gonna work. You have 30 minutes to call me after you are done with your shift/event/whatever. After that, you need to find your own way home. If you don't know *when* you're going to be done somewhere, I'll hang around and wait to see if you need a ride if I don't have anything else to do, but if not, just assume that you're going to need to get your own transportation. And don't just invite me places because you need a ride there."
That's how I'd handle it. Then again, I'm kind of a *****.
2007-01-02 06:19:35 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
You need to get out of that relationship and don't look back. A good relationship is about sharing your lives together. If he knew you were waiting for him, he should have called you and told you what was up. It seems he has no respect for you and just wants you to be at his beckon call. Not a good situation for you. Great for him.
2007-01-02 13:39:46 · answer #2 · answered by rbarc 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
from my experience, a guy who doesn't call(and let me guess he has no cell phone, right??) is useless, I'm glad that you went out and did your own thing, opposed to sitting home and sobbing all night. Usually when you feel like something is just not right, its not. Find a guy that you can trust and depend on.
2007-01-02 13:32:11 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
You don't. You tell him you picked up some dude, did his brains out and when you woke up you were in Mexico married to a chinese midget.
2007-01-02 13:30:14 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Hey,that's tough...you know. He should have called. Oh, and take care of his DUI's!
2007-01-02 13:31:51 · answer #5 · answered by just me 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
we all make bad choices. he needs to be more considerate if he expects a chauffer.
2007-01-02 13:34:55 · answer #6 · answered by sinned 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
What's the question again?
2007-01-02 13:31:18 · answer #7 · answered by Just me 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i think u should stop dranking and get a job lol
2007-01-02 13:36:54 · answer #8 · answered by ? 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
What exactly is your question?
2007-01-02 13:52:13 · answer #9 · answered by Brandy 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
What is the question?
2007-01-02 13:28:56 · answer #10 · answered by Brownie_baby 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋