I am my boyfriends 1st girlfriend. He liked girls before me, but i do not know what happened btwn that, he's never told me. He still considers all those crushes friends though and is very friendly with them. it annoys me because i do not know if he still has feelings for them or not. when i ask about his past with them, he says do we have to talk about this. so i drop the subject. i feel like i have a right to know why he liked those girls and what exactly happened btwn them so i can know where they stand now. infact one of the girls he still talks to, the first time i met him, she was all over him that i had actually thought she was his GF. he began macking me a few weeks after that scene but yet him and her are still friends. Am i wrong in letting this bother me? Its just hard for me to see him talking to a pretty girl whom i THOUGHT was his GF by the way she was lounging on his lap the 1st time i met him. Any advice? This relationship is new and i dont want to ruin anything...
2007-01-02 04:58:29 · 18 answers · asked by enchantinglydia 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
It would be hard not to be jealous. You sound pretty young, so I wouldn't take it that seriously. But, tell him how you feel. Good luck.
2007-01-02 05:01:49 · answer #1 · answered by Rosie aka Rosie 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well if the guy you are with is being 'cautious', then it must mean that he's a little insecure about you. It would be normal for anyone to have the feelings that you've explained. You obviously long for more intimacy and the guy you're with isn't giving you enough and if you pursue the guy you're having an 'intimacy crush' on without breaking up with the guy you're currently dating, then you would have made a mistake that so many people in the world have done before you. And not only that, the insecurities your current boyfriend has would be confirmed. It comes down to when you and your boyfriend would spend time talking about your relationship and where it's going from there to know for sure if you should pursue the other guy.
2016-05-23 06:36:01 · answer #2 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
This is a natural response. This is what keeps us from taking the other for granted (in a relationship)...its when we become too comfortable that things sometimes happen. When you are in a relationship, you have to give a certain amount of trust and risk. The incident between he and the other girl is in the past...before you were 'macking.'...so, it is best to just let that go. Sure, he can have friends...but, as the relationship develops, you will both establish ground rules, as to excepted limitations. For example, if that girl now walks up to your current boyfriend and lounges on his lap, you have every right to say in a serious, clear, and calm tone, "get off my boyfriends lap." And, then you also have to be open enough to tell your boyfriend that he has to understand limitations in relationships and behave if you are his gf...especially, if he expects or wants these limitations to be exhibited by you. This would only be brought up, if a situation did occur. Telling him that you are his and that you only think of him is another way of reinforcement without being overbearing, overly jealous, or controlling. If he doesn't care, and he thinks that it is OK for him to flirt heavily with others while he is dating you....and this bothers you, you need to be true to yourself and realize that he is probably not relationship material, for you.
2007-01-02 05:12:49 · answer #3 · answered by What, what, what?? 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I dont know how old you guys are, but im thinking since you are his first not that old. Learn this now before later.... you cant go around worried about what your man is doing every second. Life is too short to worry yourself over what he is doing. He is with you for a reason. you could ruin this relationship if you try and make a big deal about somthing that is soo small. He might really just be friends with them and really like you! If he wants to go somewhere else, he will no matter what you do, so there is no point in trying to control who he talks to. Just figured i would help you out alittle. sorry if i sound rude... goodluck!
2007-01-02 05:05:19 · answer #4 · answered by smitty4626 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I think u hve to work hsrd but still this suspicion will not go/ it was ok if it dint come ur notice but when u know it u must use ur judgement/n if possible leave him at this stage amicably/otherwise life will be hell for u/ Take a matured decision/ dont discusss much with others. /Better change before it is too late/watch not take it seriously/ u can always partwith at this stage/ if i am wrong pl forgive me.
2007-01-02 05:22:22 · answer #5 · answered by raashi 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If he doesn't mind those girls being around him neither should you, flirt with other guys as well just like he's doing. If this ends up bothering him, he'll speak up. If you really like this guy then tell him how you feel, if it's just a fling then I think you deserve better, because your boyfriend seems like a player and that's not cool.
2007-01-05 17:26:29 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
your showing your jealous and he loves it why dont u spend time with some of your old crushes and see how he likes that and if he asks you "who is that" or "where do you know him from" tell him "its really not that important" just how he does you 2 can play the game dont let him get the best of you and if he continues drop him and find another all men a replaceable.
2007-01-02 05:05:24 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
I hope that it is all right, as I'm still chummy with my high school girl friend even though I have a good marriage which I fully intend to keep.
2007-01-02 05:01:38 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
girl dont be dumb.. he needs to stop... if he really wants you then he'll keep a distance from all this girls.. i dought that he would like you to have a whole lot of sexy guys around you and specially if he saw them making out with you even if it was before you guys got together....
if he doesnt stop.. than drop him .. he aint worth it.
2007-01-02 05:05:35 · answer #9 · answered by JACKIE M 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
WELL, YOU NEED TO TELL HIM HOW YOU FEEL. I GUESS I WOULDNT WANT TO TELL MY BF ABOUT MY EXES OR MY CRUSHES EITHER SO I UNDERSTAND HOW COME HE DOESNT EITHER. YOU NEED TO ALSO TELL HIM THAT B/C YOU KNOW YOU ARE HIS FIRST GF IT ISNT OK FOR GIRLS TO BE HANGING ALL OVER YOU AND HIM ON THEM. IF HE DOESNT GET THE PCTURE START TO DOING THE SAME AND THEN MAYBE HE WILL. IF NOT HE ISNT WORTH YOUR TIME.
2007-01-02 05:04:21 · answer #10 · answered by becca_2 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋